Sig files and Quotes

Assortment of Sig.s and Quotes

Here is a collection I have put together of signature files and quotes that I have found on other people's e-mail. Nothing here has been thought up or written by me -- I have just collected it all into one place because I have never seen such a collection and think that most of this is really neat, and that the creators deserve as much of an audience as possible (though this page will probably not help much). I have tried to assign credit wherever I could, but I have not put any e-mail addresses, so I'm afraid you won't be able to bother the creators. Have fun... and by the way, if you've seen any neat sig. files and the such that aren't here, feel free to send them via e-mail...

First, the sig. files...

WANTED: trendy & cool sig. in gd condit., orig. owner, pref. new, low
usage. gender/race doens't matter but pref. aqua blue. will pay in wb
page hits.

      -- by edwin (real name unknown)

I thought that one was kind of clever. Here's a spoof of a dos error message that I found hilarious:

Warning, Unrecoverable error in "life.sys"
Abort/Retry/Fail?_

      -- by David Huh

Here's an actual dos error message that I found on an e-mail 3 days after a friend actually got it:

No keyboard. Press F1 to continue.

My friend, Charles Hall, had ordered a computer in pieces, and received the keyboard last. He was hoping that he could at least get some of the setup done without the keyboard because he had a mouse, but DOS just gave him that message.

+=======================================================+
| DISCLAIMER: The above expressed views are not necessarily that of the author. |
| In fact, he disclaims all knowledge of his statements and rebutes his own                 |
| stated beliefs. That said, his recommendation: "Take my words to heart."                |
+=======================================================+

      -- by David Huh

That was found right below the "error in Life.sys". I have often considered putting something like it on some of my pages...maybe even this one? Now here's the only decent piece of ASCII art I have ever seen, though I have seen many variations:

\^^^^^^^^/
(.) (.)
--------------------------.oooO-- (__) --Oooo.--------------------------

      -- by Tim McGuire

Well, that does it for the sig. files, for now at least. Now on to the quotes.

"If the only tool you have is a hammer,
            everything tends to look like a nail."
      -- by Johan Lindstrom.

"It is now proven that smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics."
      -- variously ascribed.

"If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried." -- Murphy's Laws
"Indecision is the key to flexibility."
"All things being equal, fat people use more soap."
      -- from Mark Kuba.

I used to be lunacy in all its radiant splendor.
            Now I'm just 100 watts of brilliant madness.
      --Chris Pilgrim.

"Never ask what sort of computer a guy drives. If he's a Mac user, he'll
tell you. If not, why embarrass him?" -- Tom Clancy.
      -- Though I don't agree, I still think it's funny.

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