All characters belong to Paramount, but the story and the character Chumani are mine. (Please don't use any parts or the character without the mention of my name - thank you.)

THANKS to all the people who gave me wonderful feedback for my first three storiesJ, I didn't expect that so many would read them and like them. Many asked me for the continuation, here it comes. Sorry you had to wait that long. Enjoy!

Rated: PG-13

This story takes place after "Daddy2".

CHUMANI

by Lisa Hanson

I awoke for the 5^th time and looked again at the chronometer on the nightstand. Only  2 hours had passed since I was awake the last time. I took a look at Chumani, who's bed stood beside ours. She was still asleep and breathed calmly. I asked myself if that would continue, to wake up a few times just to check out if the baby is all right. I turned to the other side and looked at Kathryn, she was still sleeping. She looked exhausted. She had all the right to be, after all she's gone through. Fortunately men  don't have to do this, I've never been a weak person, but I guess giving birth would kill me, considering the condition I've been in just supporting Kathryn. No further children, that's for sure. Besides I felt wonderful, my life was so perfect, it couldn't be  better. Chumani chosed that moment to stir and weep a little. I got up, picked her up and cradled her gently in my arms. No doubt her behind was wet. I went into her room. 

"Do you think we'll get the diaper changing done? - Yeah, we will, right?"

I placed her down and began carefully changing her diapers. It was tricky, but in the end I succeeded. When I was done and she laid back within my arms I said "See, we both managed very well."

Chumani stuffed her fist into her mouth and began to suckle. "Sorry honey, can't help you with that. We have to wake your Mama."

I went back into the bedroom and sat down on the bed. I stroked Kathryn's cheek. "Wake up love." I repeated that a few times until she blinked and opened her eyes. She stretched and grimaced.

"How are you feeling?"

"Little bit tense and sore, but wonderful."

"Someone is very hungry."

Kathryn sat up and I handed Chumani to her, she placed her into the right position and began to nurse her. Chumani greedily suckled and Kathryn had the most wonderful smile on her face watching our daughter, she looked fantastic, she radiated happyness.

"What changed your mind about the way you want to feed her?"

She looked into my eyes "When you told me yesterday that Chumani is hungry, the first thing I thought was that I have the food here inside me, I didn't think about a bottle. It was instinct I guess."

I smiled. "Instinct? You always told me scientists don't make decisions because they have an instinct."

"Well, you made me a mother, that has changed me."  She smiled at me.

I could have sit there for hours just watching my family, but Kathryn didn't eat in a while and I thought she should have a proper meal.

"It's 13:00. What do you think, lunch?"

"Yes, I'm starving."

What do you want?"

"Eggs, croissants and orangejuice please."

I went into the living room and replicated eggs, toast, orangejuice, tea and strawberries for Kathryn. I considered to replicate a bunch of roses, but I thought their strong smell wouldn't do the baby any good and decided instead for a single red one. I went back into our bedroom and placed the tray on the nightstand as Kathryn was just about to put Chumani back into her bed.

"Already done?"

"Yeah, she fell asleep." Kathryn said and got back into bed. I sat down too and I handed her the rose.

"For making me the happiest man alive."

She smiled at me. "I noticed. You are aware that you didn't stop grinning since hours?" she asked me.

"Yep, it's just that I'm so happy."

"Me too."



"You've been right." Kathryn said during lunch.

"Bout what?" I asked, still chewing on a mouthful of rice pudding.

"About our wedding."

I stared at her and almost choked my food "Our wedding?"

"Yes, you were right about everything you said to me. We have to live here and now. We managed to live together and the pregnancy without violating the command structure or the protocol." She smiled at me and added "And I like the idea being married to the man I love."

I took her hand in mine, my heart beat fast and I felt wonderful. I lifted her chin so that I could look into her eyes. "And you are really sure about this? There is no way back, this is forever."

"Yes, absolutely. I'm very sure that I love you."

That was all I needed. "And I'm very sure that I love you." I kissed her.

After we broke the kiss I said "Kathryn, you have a really bad habit about telling me important things."

"Huh?"

"You told me you want to have a baby at breakfast and now you're telling me we should get married. Why can't you chose a nice evening for these things?"

She smiled at me "Because I'm not always a reasonable woman. That's what you called me once."

I laughed "True. When do you think should we do it?"

"We have to think about how we could manage this. I'm the only one aboard who can marry people, we have to find a way to solve this problem and I'd like to wait until I'll fit back into my gala uniform"

"Okay. Close your eyes now. I have a surprise for you. I'll be right back."

I went to my desk. I had hidden a ring for her for a long time. I took it and went back to her. I held the ring in one hand and took her left hand in mine.

"Now you can open your eyes." I took a deep breath. "Will you marry me?"

She looked into my eyes and smiled "Yes."

My hands shivered as I put the ring on her finger and kissed her.

She looked at her hand "Oh, this ring is so beautiful. Since when do you have it?"

"For a while." Kathryn was always a very curious person and I loved to tease her.

"Spill it. Since when?"

"Well, I spared my replicator rations right after we came back from our first shore leave."

"But you couldn't be sure then."

"I knew that if I would be patient you would finally give in someday."

"You're..." She laughed.

"...incredible, I know." I laughed too.

We kissed again.

"So, now we are officially engaged." I said and laughed "Not in the most romantic way people usually do, but we are."

Kathryn laughed "What has been usual in our relationship?"

"Nothing."


On the first day in her life Chumani got many visitors. Neelix came over and brought a big basket of fruits for Kathryn. "Captain, promise me to eat all of them." he said and he made compliments about Chumani "She's as beautiful as her mother."

Tom and B'Elanna came over and brought a box full of baby toys and the first thing she said was "Chakotay, whatever you do, you don't do it halfway, this girl is the exact copy of you."

Tuvok stood there stiff and formal as always, but as he looked at our girl I could swear that I saw a flash of a smile on his lips.

And Harry, Harry was wonderful, Kathryn was very touched, he brought her a little bunch of flowers from Earth and a stuffed dog for Chumani "Because you told me, that you always loved dogs.". All other crew members had sent greetings over the computer. 


The first days we were nothing but happy. Every day when I went home, we sat together for a while, holding our baby girl in our arms and admired her. I've never before felt constantly that wonderful and happy. I was complete now, that was the peace I've been looking for my whole life. I finally found the other half of my heart and soul. It wasn't always peaceful between us, we still had our argues, but we were always able to solve our problems. And the birth of our daughter was definitely the best thing what happened to us. I was totally in love with my girl. Tom used to tease me a lot about that when we met off duty. but I knew that he was equally happy having his son, and so I laughed about his comments and usually teased back. We all had changed so much the last years, since we met so many things had happened - good ones, bad ones. I've never thought I would ever be friend with Tom Paris, the arrogant and superficial men, I've met first. I've never imagined I would be together with my Captain and never thought I would end up having a child with her, well a child at all.

My life had changed so often, I left my tribe for starfleet, I have built my carreer, I left starfleet to fight for my homeworld, I ended up in the delta quadrant and now the biggest challenge in life had begun, to raise a child. The first nights I got up and sneeked into Chumani's room, sat down in the rocking chair beside her and thought about my life and my parents. I've never thought that much about them before. The way they have raised me and my sister, our disagreements, our good times. I began to understand a lot of things my parents had done. The fear, the love they have felt and showed. I felt the same way since I was a father. I wanted to be the best father I could and I was afraid, this was such a new feeling for me, I've never feared much, now it was different, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to love and support her enough, to make things wrong in raising her.


About one week after Chumani's birth, I went to the bathroom after my shift. I thought Kathryn was with B'Elanna and I would take a shower. When I entered the bathroom, Kathryn stood there, naked and it seemed that she would take a bath.

"Hi Honey" I said

"Couldn't you ask before you enter?" she shouted at me and took fast her robe and held it in front of her body.

"What's that?" I thought. "Sorry, I didn't know that you are in here and besides what's the matter, I've seen you naked before." I laughed and stepped closer to take her into my arms.

"Please leave me alone." she stepped back.

"What's wrong, Kathryn?"

"I don't want you to see me. I am not looking very attractive at the moment."

"You'll be always attractive to me." Wrong words, Kathryn became angry.

"Not anymore, if you would really look at me, you wouldn't say that. My belly looks so awful, fat and the skin sags."

"Kathryn, you've had our baby in there a week ago. Soon you will have your figure back."

I couldn't understand that, we shared the most intimate moments two people can share and now she was shy on me. We were lovers since almost two years and I knew every part of her body and I've seen her giving birth to our daughter and that was far more intimate than every night we've spend together. I've seen her laying there in not the most attractive position, sweaty, in pain, screaming and that experience made her not less sexy to me. I wanted to tell her that, but not then.

Her anger became sadness, she began to cry. I stepped closer, took her into my arms and held her tight.

"I don't know what's wrong with me." she said under sobs.

"Doc told us, we should expect this. Most woman go through this."

After a while I said "So, I'll leave you now to your bath and take a look at Chumani."

"Yes, and sorry."

"It's okay." I said and left the bathroom and went to Chumani's room. I bend over her bed and stroked her face "Hi Sweetie, Daddy's home." I smiled at myself, I loved to hear the word Daddy and I couldn't await hearing when Chumani would say it for the first time to me. She was awake and looked at me, I took her out of her bed and sat down in Kathryn's rocking chair. I sat there for a long time, talking to her until Kathryn came inside.

"Sorry to disturb your conversation, but it's time for her dinner."

"Sure", I stood up and handed her our daughter. She sat down in the chair and opened her robe, I decided that it would be better to leave her alone because after the incident in our bathroom I wasn't sure if she wanted me there.

"I'll take my shower now and then we can have dinner." I said and went towards the door. I took my shower, dressed in a shirt and trousers and went to our living room. Kathryn had made dinner for us, we sat down, ate and discussed the events of the day.

"Would you like to be captain a little while longer?" she asked me.

Kathryn had decided, in the last week of her pregnancy that she would return to duty as soon as possible after the birth.

"Don't you feel well enough?"

"No, it's just, I would like to spend more time with Chumani and besides I can't feed her in the captain's chair." She laughed.

"No, you can't do, think about Harry. If he would see you feeding her he would be shocked." I laughed.

"It's such a bad view?"

I embraced her "No, for me it's a wonderful view. You look so lovely and peaceful when you feed her, but Harry is always so embarrassed when it comes to looking at a woman's bosom, when he does he will soon be flushed."

"And you don't?"

"Well, I've looked often in my life, but the last years I only looked at your bosom." I laughed.

"I hope so."

We sat silent for a while, snuggled together.

"It was when we were on New Earth." she suddenly said.

"What?"

"When you looked the first time at my bosom, when I stood beside the tub."

"No, I've looked before. But that was the first time I wanted more than looking."

"I was aware of it."

"Really?"

"Yes, I saw the look in your eyes. And I had the full prove that day when you gave me the neckrub. I've been fully aware of that you wanted to do more than massaging my shoulders."

I blushed "Really? I didn't know that."

"Hey." she said and stroked my cheek "That was natural. It had a similar effect on me, you know. Your hands on my shoulders, your breath in my hair, that's because I ran from you. I've been afraid. And I thought we had to define parameters before the things would go out of our hands."

"It hadn't been my intention to...seduce you when I gave you the neckrub, I just wanted to help you. Well, I didn't think that I would react so strong to your closeness."

"I know that."

"That was the day I realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you."

"You have never before considered it?"

"Not in that way. I think, the uniforms helped. I was attracted to you, but I knew it couldn't happened. But when we were stranded, I fell more and more in love with you." I paused.

"Kathryn?"

"Hmmmm."

"I meant what I said in the bathroom today. You will always be beautiful to me and the birth of Chumani was the best thing what happened to me beside the fact that you love me. And while you gave birth to her and since then I never thought that you are less attractive or sexy."

I looked at her, she had tears in her eyes which began rolling down her cheeks. I wiped them away "Hey it was a compliment." I smiled

"I know, it's just .... I am so happy to have you and my baby."

"So am I."


Four weeks later when Kathryn returned to duty our life became difficult. Not even that she had a hard time sharing her time between duty and Chumani, we got low on energy and there wasn't any planet in reach for a long time, so we had to set up regulations to save the energy we had and flown only with impulse drive. We had less time for each other, all days long we tried to solve ship problems and when we finally went home, we took care about Chumani and that had become difficult, she has become restless, at nights she awoke almost every second hour and cried. And sometimes she was restless even on the days.

When I went home after my shift I heard Chumani crying in the corridor, I hurried to press my entering code and stepped into the living room. Kathryn was sitting on the floor, the crying Chumani in her arms. I went to sit beside her. "What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know, she just won't stop crying. I tried everything, I tried to feed her several times, but she just won't drink, I changed her diapers, I paced around our quarters, rocking her, but it just didn't help." I could see that Kathryn was on the edge with her nerves.

"Come, give her to me for a while and get yourself some tea." Kathryn went to the replicator and I rocked my little girl softly in my arms. "Shhhhhh. What's wrong, Sweetie? Must be something serious, when you are complaining that loud, huh? Calm down, honey, will you?" I spoke to her in a low voice. I stroked her cheek, then over her mouth and she sucked on my finger. "Kathryn, did you try camomile tea?"

"No, not yet." She went to the replicator, ordered a bottle of camomile tea, came over and handed the bottle to me. I replaced my finger with the nipple on the bottle, but Chumani spit it out and decided to cry further. I tried it several times, still talking to soothe her and somehow she began to drink. "Now this is good, isn't it?" I whispered and still rocked her a little.

Kathryn sat beside me all the time, watching us. "You have such a way with her. She always seems to be more calm when you're around."

"It's just luck."

"No. Remember the time I was carrying her? When she was restless, always bouncing around inside of me, when you've been around, stroking my belly and talking to her she always calmed down."

Chumani finnished drinking and I took the towel which lay on the couch beside me and placed it over my shoulder, then I placed Chumani on there, stroking her back. "Those were always the moments when you tensed up too much. When you are calm, the baby is calm, it's that simple." I paused looking at Kathryn. "You don't need to be a perfect mother, just relax and show her that you love her."

Kathryn looked at me "I guess you are right." She said and placed her head against my shoulder.

About four weeks later we've succeeded in solving all our energy problems, life was back to normal, at least depending the ship.


I awoke and heard crying, it took a while until I realized where it came from. The nursery. I jumped out of the bed and went there. Chumani was crying loud. She woke usually a few times at night and wanted her bottle. Most times Kathryn fed her, she wanted to do it, because she had less time for her all days long. I enjoyed these nights when I got up to feed her, I held her always for a long time and thought a lot about my past and her future. "Shhhh, what's wrong, Chumani?"

I took her into my arms. I checked the diapers, nothing. "Are you hungry then?"

I went to the replicator, Chumani in my arms and she still cried "Shhhh, we won't wake up Mama."

I replicated a bottle, went back to the nursery, sat down in the rocking chair and fed her. "So my little girl was hungry."

After she had finished, I held her until she was asleep. She looked really peaceful in her sleep, I smiled, Kathryn had told me, that Chumani looks exactly like me when she is asleep. I stroked her cheek "So that's what I look like." She was still very similar to me, same dark hair, dark skin, my mouth and my eyes, but definitely Kathryn's nose, what I think is better for a girl. I loved this little girl since the moment when I saw her for the first time, no that's wrong, I loved her before, when we heard from the Doctor Kathryn was pregnant I began to fall in love with that life inside of her and the feeling grow like Kathryn's belly. And when I held her right after she was born my heart was bursting with love. Nothing was comparable with that feeling I had for my daughter, not even the love I felt for her mother. It was special, Chumani was a part of myself.

I was lost in my thoughts and didn't notice that Kathryn had entered the room until she said "You should have woken me up."

"It's all right. I just fed her. She's already asleep again."

Kathryn embraced me from behind and lent her head against mine, she laughed softly.

"What?" I asked her.

"I'm still stunned by the fact that she is the exact copy of you. Did I ever told you that you are a wonderful Dad?"

"I'm trying my best."

"Let's go back and catch a little sleep." She said and kissed my cheek.

I put Chumani back into her bed and we walked arm in arm back into our bedroom and got into bed again.


"She's three months old now, it's incredible." Kathryn suddenly said.

"Yes, the time is running by so fast, do you know that she smiled at me today as I bend over her bed ?" I was proud, it was the first time she seemed to recognize me.

"Really?"

"Yes, well, she loves me."

"I know someone else who loves you?"

"And who might that be?"

Kathryn snuggled into my arms. "Guess."

I laid my arms around her and held her tight. Then I kissed her and it wasn't one of the gentle loving kissed we've shared the last months, it was full of passion. Well, holding Kathryn so close made me crazy, we had the permission from Doc since 6 weeks. Kathryn responded at first, but soon she withdrew.

"We should sleep now." She said and turned around. I touched her arm.

"Wait. Kathryn, what's wrong? You avoid me. Every time I kiss you, I have the feeling you run from me. Why?"

"It's nothing."

"No, it's not.

Her eyes looked at the sheets, her lips pressed together. She didn't say anything.
That was the old Kathryn Janeway who struggled to talk about things which were to emotional.  I sighed.

"I am so tired Chakotay and all things seems to be to much for me lately, I can't be a captain, a mother and your lover at the same time."

"It's no sign of weakness to delegate things, Kathryn."

Suddenly she smiled.

"What?"

"You can always read my mind."

"Hmmm, at least I try. What do you think, a little bit snuggling tonight?"

She laughed. "You always make me laugh, do you know that?"

"Yeah, that's only because I love to see you happy. What's now about the snuggling thing, I'd really love to."

"Can't let you suffer." She said and snuggled into my arms.

"Feels good?"

"Mhmmmm."

"See, I told you." I said and stroked her back. Soon she was asleep.


One evening a few days later Kathryn stood in front of the mirror, dressed from the party on the holodeck, she wore the green sleeveless dress she liked so much and I have to admit it fitted her. I hugged her from behind. "See, your figure is back."

"Almost." She sighed "Still a few pounds to much. Here and here." She indicated to her hips and her belly. I let my hands roam softly over her hips and let them rest on her belly and stroked it. "Well, I like that you are a bit more rounded. It suits you." I nibbled along her neck, she lent her head back, rested it against my shoulder, her eyes were closed. I turned her in my arms and kissed her, we kissed for a while, I was really turned on, I already thought that it might become my lucky night…

"I need to go to the bathroom." Kathryn suddenly said and soon she disappeared.

I knew that she was tired and overstressed, but this was really frustrating. I removed my clothes and went to the bed. After a while Kathryn came back, laid beside me, kissed my cheek, said "Good Night." and turned to her side, her back against me. In the past I would snuggle against her from behind, but that night I guess she wouldn't wanted me to. Soon I heard her breathing even, she was asleep.

I laid awake for a long time and thought. We had to do something against that. I loved her and I was happy to be together with her, talking, kissing, touching even arguing. I enjoyed it all, but I really missed the intimate part of our relationship, every try to seduce her has been without success.

I understood that she was tired and that she had to adjust to all the changes in our life.  It slowly drove me crazy. My mind told me to be patient, to wait until she would be ready, but my body plain and simple wanted her. Well, I lived almost five years without making love to her, but then I didn't know what I would miss.

Sleep wouldn't come and so I decided to turn to the casino, I had left a note for Kathryn in case she should wake up and headed there, only stopping at my office to take a few reports. The casino was empty, I ordered a herbal tea and sat down, sipping my tea, reading. After a while Tom, who had the night shift, joined me.

We chatted a while about ships business until Tom said "It's not easy to adjust to live with a child, is it?"

"No."

"After about half a year life will be back to normal and…you'll be even allowed to touch your wife again."

Boy, how could he know, why I was there, I mean, did I have a fluorescent lamp on my forehead showing "I am frustrated"? I searched for a diplomatical answer, I didn't need to discuss my sexual life with Paris. To my relief he stood up and said "I'm back to work, see you tomorrow."

"See you, Tom."



The next day I reserved the holodeck for 24 hours and bid B'Elanna to take care of our daughter. When our shift was over and Kathryn wanted to go to our quarters I said "No, we have the next 24 hours off, vacation at Lake George."

She looked at me "But we can't..."

I interrupted her "Yes, we can. B'Elanna will take care of Chumani and we both will have a nice time." I kissed her to stop all further arguments. We went to the holodeck, changed from our uniforms to informal clothes and walked along the Lake, I took Kathryn's hand in mine. After a while we stopped and watched the dawn. I stood behind her and held her tight, her head was leaning against my chest, her hands on my arms. We stood there for a long time without talking. Suddenly I felt that Kathryn was shivering. "Cold?" I asked her.

"Yes, a little, let's go back."

We went back to our shelter and made dinner, Kathryn cutted the fruits for dinner while I cooked our favorite lasagna. We talked and laughed a lot.

I looked at her, she was so beautiful and sexy in that blue dress, I always loved to see her in that one. I walked over to her and stroked up and down her naked arm. "You look really beautiful in that dress, do you know that?" I whispered in her ear, then placed a kiss on her neck and went back to continue with my cooking.

After dinner Kathryn laid back on the couch "I'm so full, I think I can't move anymore."

"Not funny, Kathryn. I'd like to dance with you."

"I can't." she laughed.

"Come on, up with you." I took her hand in mine.

"Noooo."

I bend over and tickled her ribs, she squirmed and laughed.

"You like to dance with me?"

"Nooo, stop that."

I continued tickling her, she screamed.

"Ready to dance now?"

"Okay, I give up." she said breathless.

I took her into my arms and we began to move, I had ordered the program to play a slow song. She lent her head against my chest and wrapped her arms around my neck. I wrapped my arms around her waist and stroked up and down her back.

"I'd like to know if Chumani is all right." she said.

I bent down and whispered in her ear "Chumani is all right, B'Elanna takes care of her. You're not a mother and not a captain tonight. Just a woman. The two of us, like in old times." I kissed her neck. She shivered a little. "Still cold?"

"Yes."

"Come I'll warm you up." I wrapped my arms tighter around her "Better?"

She nodded.

"Kathryn, as much as I love our daughter, I miss to spend time with you alone. We should take a break more often."

"Hmmmm." she murmured.

We danced silently for a while until I felt it was time to take the next step. I slowly pulled the zipper on her back down.

"Hey..."

I silenced her with a kiss. "Shhhh, I just want to feel your skin." I put my hands on her naked back and stroked her. After a while her tense muscles loosened up and my heartbeat increased.

"Is it getting hot in here?" I asked her.

"A little. Maybe you should remove your shirt." she said and began to open the buttons and shoved it down my arms.

"Much better." I said and wrapped my arms around her again.

"Yes."

I smiled. If anyone could see us now. Two middle aged people, Captain and First Officer and parents, danced there half naked like a couple of teenagers. I stopped dancing, lifted her chin up to me and kissed her.



After our lovemaking I laid with Kathryn's head on my chest. We hadn't talked for a while and I thought she was asleep. All my fears that it might be different after the birth were destroyed, it has been wonderful, even more than before we had our daughter. Though, it was always wonderful. Nothing in comparison to our very first time, but now it was even better, we knew each other, we had nothing to hold back. I looked at Kathryn's face, she was even more beautiful since she was a mother, something soft had added to her features. It wasn't there all the time, just in those moments when she was relaxed, in sleep, when she held Chumani or when she was together with me. On duty she was the same strong woman as always, I've always admired her, she was able to step along the fine line between being a Captain and a woman. There were many female Captain's in Starfleet, but I've never met any like Kathryn, who was so strong and able to make decisions about life and death without a blink in her eye and still able to how her feminine side occasionally. Soon this incredible woman would be official mine, then I would put the wedding ring on her finger. I took her hand in mine.

"You're awake?" she asked me.

"Yeah, I thought you were asleep."

"No, couldn't sleep. It's Chumani's usual time to wake me, I think that's the reason."

I played with her fingers "Kathryn, you should allow me to get up with her more nights. It's too much for you. We're partners, you know."

"I know, but I want to a good mother and I miss her so much during the days. It's like I wouldn't have enough time, I always neglect one important part and sometimes I doubt if this was the right decisions to get a baby."

"Shhhh, don't even think that. You are a good mother and it will get better. We just have to get used to it. Tom told me after the first half year it will get better."

"You're talking with Tom about our problems?"

I laughed "Just in general, not about the intimate side of our relationship."

"You wouldn't have much to talk about these last weeks."

"True, but that changed tonight."

"Yeah, your seducing did work. Detailed planning, I know why I chosed you as my first officer." She laughed.

"I had to think about something special, you weren't very responsible to my tries the last weeks."

"I know....sorry."

I lifted her chin up "Hey, I understand that. And hot, passionate love making isn't the reason why I love you."

She raised her eyebrows.

I laughed "Okay, I admit, it's one of the reasons."

I stroked over her lips and down to her neck "Hey, what's this, two hickeys here. You remember when I made them?" I laughed.

She nodded and grinned "Yep."

"Hmmmm, think my mind always went blank when you start whispering those nice things into my ear. Baby, you drive me crazy with that."

"Baby?"

"You like this nickname?" I laughed.

"Do you think it's appropriate? I'm a starship captain and a mother."

"Most certainly it is. I'm a starship commander and a father and that doesn't stop you from whispering all these encouraging stuff into my ear." I said and looked into her eyes. Her face turned from slightly pink to red. I loved that, in our intimate moments she was often blushing like a teenager. She was always embarrassed because of her feelings, I didn't want her to feel that way and so I changed the topic. I looked at the chronometer on the nightstand.

"It's 4:00, want to watch the sunrise with me?"

"Yes."

We stood up, pulled on our robes and went outside to the lake. I sat down against a rock and Kathryn sat down between my legs with her back against my chest. I loved to sit with her that way, it was such a wonderful closeness. I wrapped my arms tightly around her waist. She lent her head against my shoulder and sighed.

"What?"

"Do you think we will ever sit this way home again?"

"Yes. We made it this far and I'm sure we'll be home soon."

"I want to be home, I want to take this crew home, but....well....it's just that it isn't the same feeling I had when we started this mission. I'm happy now, even if it will take a lot of years. I'm more calm now. All I need is here, the man I love and my baby."

She sighed again. "Do you think I'm a worse Captain now, I mean that I don't pay enough attention to my job anymore?"

"No, you're still a wonderful Captain. And the crew like you even more now since you're a mother, because it makes you more human, more reachable."

"Really?"

"Yes, I overhear a lot you know."

"What else do you hear?"

"Well, that the Captain is happy now and that this make the crew happy. And that's easier to talk to her and that she is more beautiful."

"You're teasing me."

"No, it's true. Especially the male crew members say that. Lieutenant Bornley even said 'We have the sexiest Captain in Starfleet.'"

"He didn't" She giggled.

"Oh yes he did. And I agree with him." I kissed her neck.

"He doesn't see me like this in the early morning without any Make up, think it would change his opinion." She laughed.

"I don't know if it would change his opinion, but I know that I love the way you look in the early mornings, the way your hair is in disarray, the way your skin smells."

She moved her head and smiled at me and I kissed her.

"Let's go back into bed." I murmered against her mouth and she nodded.

We made love for the second time that night and afterwards we laid cuddled together. Kathryn was already asleep. These wonderful moments I always enjoyed. Feeling calm and warm in my body and in my soul. Passion is wonderful and thrillling, but these quiet joinings are more satisfying.

The next day we've spent mostly outside, walking, swimming, laying in the sun and we finally set up a date for our wedding in four weeks.

We planned that Tuvok would be in command for one day, so when he was acting captain he had the right to marry people and we planned spending two days in the holodeck, we needed a little honeymoon too.


The next day we talked to Tuvok, he was as usual calm and emotionless, but a few hours later he came to my office.

"Commander, may I have a word with you?"

"What comes next?" I thought. "Sure, take a seat." I said.

"You know that I didn't agree with the Captain at first, as she had decided you would be the First Officer, because I thought, you would start a mutiny someday. I didn't trust you."

"I'm aware of that."

"But the last years, you've been the best First Officer a Captain could ask for and you've been her best friend, she is human and human needs friends, especially in that situation. But I didn't agree with her when she started a relationship with you, it's totally against protocol, having a child, too. But then I became aware of that the Captain is more happy since then, as I've ever seen her before. And that's because I'm here. I would just say that I accept your relationship and I'm honored to marry you."

"Thank you, Tuvok." He still sat.

"Anything else?"

"No, Sir."

He left my office.



In one of my "It's your turn to feed her, Daddy."-nights I came to a conclusion. I've had just fed her, changed her diapers and now I was sitting in the rocking chair, lulling her back into sleep. I've stroked her hair aside, for her age she had lots of hair, dark and silky. I couldn't stop watching her, even when she was sleeping. I'd felt something you could call "male proud", never experienced a feeling like that before, I had placed a seed and the outcome was this cute little girl. I was getting lost in thoughts about what Chumani's future might held for her, my soon-to-be marriage with Kathryn, our future together, I imagined us at home, I saw a house with garden, Kathryn was working in the backyard, surrounded by 4 children of different ages…then it hit me, I wanted more babies, I wanted to get into this again, but this time aware of what would happen, no, I couldn't say that I wasn't aware of when we tried to become pregnant, the pregnancy, the birth and what came afterwards, but it was different then, certainly I knew the "technical aspect" but the next time I would get into it, knowing about all of these wonderful feelings. Then my thoughts went back to my male proudness, I laughed silently, the male in my tribe seemed to like getting their wifes pregnant, they showed their rounded wifes around with a silly grin on their faces. I've always wanted to be different, I thought I had nothing in common with those ancient people, but the truth was, I didn't differ at all.

"Hey Sweety, what do you think, would you like to have some brothers and sisters someday? That would be fun, wouldn't it? But I guess we have to convince your Mom first, I'm sure she won't like this idea." I whispered to my daugher. I knew it was much to early than to think about it seriously, but in one or two years I would certainly like become a Daddy again.


Four weeks later we married. We were very excited, it was a big step for both of us. Sure in our life nothing really markable would change, we already shared our life, we already had a child, but it was an official commitment to stay together.

"When we'll be back home, Starfleet will arrest me for the rest of my life." Kathryn said and shaked her head. "What kind of things did I allow you to talk me into, hmmm?"

"Honey, there's a reason for that."

"And that might be?"

"Look, you are ordering around people, but deep inside of you, you want to be ordered yourself."

"Really?"

"Sure thing."

"And you sure have something in mind?"

"Of course, you'll serve hubby breakfast in bed every morning, keep satisfying all his needs…"

"Behave! You have very dirty thoughts, Mister."

"Do I?" I asked innocently.

She smacked me with a pillow.


The night before our wedding day we've slept separatly. After our shift I went to a guest quarter. I was eating, reading some padds until it was time to sleep. I went to bed and couldn't sleep. It was odd. I was so used to have Kathryn around, to tell her "Good Night", I made myself some tea and grabbed a book and went back to bed, drank my tea and read. After a while my combadge chimed.

"Hi." Kathryn said.

"Hi love, can you sleep?

"No. The bed is cold without you."

"This one is too." I paused "Want me to come over?"

"No, just wanted to tell you Good Night."

"Good night, Kathryn, I love you."

"Good night, love you too."


The next morning I jumped under the shower, made myself ready, put on the Gala-Uniform, but I couldn't eat anything, just had a cop of tea. Ten minutes before the ceromony Tom came to pick me up.

"Hi, how are you doing?"

"Don't ask."

He laid a hand on my shoulder "I'm feeling with you, buddy. I was not myself either on my wedding day. Ready?"

I stroked over my uniform, checking out for the 10^th time if everything was all right. My throat was tight, I was shivering. "Yes, let's go."

We arrived the Captain's office in time and we both entered, I looked around the room, Tuvok stood already there and B'Elanna and then I detected Kathryn, my eyes searched hers, she smiled at me, I thought I smiled back, but Kathryn came to my side, queezed my hand and whispered to me "You look so serious, afraid of me chicken out?" I shook my head. Tuvok begun to speek.

"Today we came together to join these two people, I'm very honored that I am the one who's doing it. Far away from home these both individuals met and chosed to stay together. And so I'm asking you, Commander Chakotay - will you marry this Captain Kathryn Janeway?

I swallowed, cleared my throat and said "Yes, I do."

"And I'm asking you, Captain Kathryn Janeway - will you marry this Commander Chakotay?"

"Yes, I do."

We put the wedding rings on our fingers.

"Commander Chakotay, Captain Kathryn Janeway. With the power vested in me by Starfleet Command and the United Federation of Planets, I now pronounce you husband and wife." and then he added "You may kiss the bride."

We looked into each others eyes and then we kissed.

Hand in hand we went home, it was unusual, we didn't hold hands in the open, just occassionally on the holdodeck, the casino, but never walking like that through the corridors, but that was a special day. We stopped at childcare to pick up Chumani. When we arrived home, I placed our sleeping daughter into her bed, when I went back to the living room I saw Kathryn ordering coffee from the replicator, I plopped down on the couch, watching her.

"Wife, hand your hubby a tea please." I grinned to myself.

She turned and smiled sweetly at me, ordered a cop ot tea too and then came to me and sat beside me. "You are really enjoying this, don't you?"

"Yep." I said and drew her into my arms. "Honestly Kathryn, I'm very happy, you know. The best days in my life yet were the day you told me that you love me, the day Chumani was born and today." I kissed her. Soon we were in the middle of hot necking. After a while Kathryn stopped me. "Hey, spare some passion for tonight."

"Oh Baby, don't worry, I'm planning on keeping you awake the whole night."

"Is that a promise or a warning?" She grinned.

"Both." I smiled and kissed her again.

She ended the kiss. "We still have a lot to do. The reports are waiting."

"Okay, okay, I know."

We had decided to work on some neglected reports until we would start our wedding party tonight. Nothing to do on the bridge for us today, because we were officially off duty.

We worked for hours, only took breakes to feed Chumani and ourselfs. The time ran fast and suddenly it was time to get dressed.

"You go first." Kathryn told me.

I looked puzzled at her, usually we dressed together.

"I want to surprise you with my dress."

"Okay."

While I was dressing I smiled to myself, wondering what kind of dress Kathryn had choosen for that night. When I was done, I stepped back into our living room and Kathryn disappeared into the bedroom. I waited impatiently for her to come back. When she came out, I couldn't even breath for a while. She was absolutely beautiful.
She wore a white, long satin dress, which accentuated her figure in the right places and the dècolletè was breathtaking anyway, her breasts had become more fuller, more rounder anyway since the birth and that dress couldn't hide it. Her hair was up, some white flowers put into it. She looked into my eyes.

"You are so beautiful tonight, Kathryn."

She smiled at me. We stood there for a while just looking into each others eyes.

"We have to hurry." She whispered.

"Yes." I wrapped my arm around her waist and headed toward the door. She stopped just before it would open and touched my arm. I knew she wanted me to remove it.

"Not tonight, Kathryn, protocol can begin when we are back to duty, but now you are just my wife."

She let go of my arm and wrapped hers around my waist too.

Arm in Arm we went to the Casino.

When we arrived the party was already in full swing. All off duty crew members were around. They congratulated us and threw confetti at us, a lot of them held speeches. We truly enjoyed our party, though I know that Kathryn missed her family and I missed mine too, but our crew had been growing that close that it almost was family. Music began to play and we started to dance. Suddenly the crew began to cry "We want to see a kiss."

"Shall we?" I asked Kathryn.

She nodded and we both kissed the first time in front of our crew.

The party went on, but about midnight we excused ourself.



I stopped in front of the holodeck door before open it.

"What?" Kathryn asked.

I picked her up "Well, isn't it the old Earth custom to carry the bride over the doorswell?"

"You're crazy." She laughed and slapped me on my back.

I kissed her and opened the door. We've decided to spend our honeymoon in a New Earth simulation, because it held a special meaning for us, there I've told her for the first time that I love her. I went inside and carried my wife to the shelter. I kissed her again and set her down, she embraced me and leant her head against my chest.

"Tell you what, you take a bath and I'll make the house ready."

Kathryn went away towards the bathtub and I called after her "Don't stay too long."

She only laughed.

I replicated champagne and carried the bottle, two glasses and candles to the bedroom. I placed the candles all around the room and lit them and placed the bottle and the glasses on the nightstand. I went outside and headed toward the tub, Kathryn laid there with closed eyes.

"Hi."

"Hi. I heard you coming."

"Do you enjoy your bath?"

"Yes, like to join me?"

"No, not today. I just wanted to take my wife back to the house."

"You can't await the wedding night, huh?" She asked me.

"Could be." I said and picked the towel from the floor.

Kathryn stood up and I wrapped the towel around her and took her into my arms. Arm in arm we went inside. In front of the bathroom she said "Be right back, you can already go into bed."

I went into our bedroom, removed my clothes and stepped into the bed. Soon she appeared there. I smiled at her, she stood there in the candlelight with a pink satin nightgown and she looked so beautiful.

"Come." I held my hand out to her. She stepped closer, took my hand and stepped into the bed. I took her into my arms. "You're really beautiful tonight, Kathryn."

We kissed for a while, then I opened the champagne and poured it into the glasses, I handed one to Kathryn. "To us, wife."

"To us, husband."


We had a wonderful and passionate wedding night and in the early morning hours we lay cuddled together. We hadn't talked for a while.

"Kathryn?"

"Hmmmm."

"I thought you were asleep."

"No, just dreaming." she laughed.

I hugged her a little tighter to me. "Do you know what I'm dreaming of?"

"You'd like to tell me?"

"I'm dreaming of the time when we'll be home. I'd like to have a house with garden where we both and our children can live."

"Our children?"

I stroked along her arm and placed my hand on her abdomen. "I want to have more children with you."

She placed her hand over mine. "I don't know."

"We haven't to decide it now, but I do really feel the urge to proceate myself again." I laughed.

"So?"

"Yes, I'm happy with the way we are, to have you as my wife and our daughter, but in my dream we're surrounded with kids."

I stroked along her arm and took her hand in mine.

"What about your dream, Kathryn? Wanna tell me about?"

"Sure. I imagine often how it will be to come home, to meet my mother and family again, to show them my daughter and husband, how we will celebrate. Too down to earth, huh?"

"Well, you're always the scientist, right?" I gave back with a serious voice.

She began to tickle my ribs "The scientist. - That's we way you see me. - Watch your tongue, Mister."

She swang herself up on my abdomen and looked into my eyes. "Ready to hear my non-scientific dreams?" she whispered.

I drew her down to me "As ready as one can be." I answered and kissed her.


To be continued

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