All characters belong to Paramount, but the story and the character Chumani are mine. (Please don't use any parts or the character without the mention of my name - thank you.)

This story takes place after "Decisions".

Rated: PG-13



DADDY

by Lisa Hanson



"I want to have a baby."

I almost spilled my tea when I heard her say it. We had just finished breakfast and only had about ten minutes left before our shifts were to begin, and yet she had chosen this moment to bring up such an important subject. "Wha…..what?" I managed to say.

Kathryn looked at me. "You heard me right. I....want....to …..have….a....baby." She emphasized every word.

Only a few days before she had told me that it might be impossible for us to ever have a child. I was really shocked. I had never thought that Kathryn would consider having a baby on board Voyager, at least not at that time . The sound of her voice brought me back to our talk.

"What do you think?"  she asked.

I didn't really know what to say. The first, but not the most intelligent phrase which came to mind was, "If you want to."

Kathryn just stared at me for a moment before she said, "You should tell me that will cause a lot of problems. That it is impossible here and now. That I am a Captain, that...I don't know...that I'm totally out of my mind."

"I can't." I was sure that Kathryn didn't even hear what I said, she continued without taking a breath.

"See, the Doctor told me I shouldn't waste time and so I've been thinking a lot about this these past few nights."

I interrupted her, "You seem to have a lot of time for thinking during the nights I spend with you. I thought you were asleep with a happy smile on your lips." I smiled while my mind was still whirling around.

"Don't tease me." She laughed shortly but soon became serious again. "I don't want to come to a day when the Doctor will tell me it's too late. I want this so much. The feeling is so strong, I can't ignore it anymore. And it feels so right, our relationship is wonderful, I'm so happy with you and I love you so much. I've always wanted a child and it wouldn't be a problem if we were home, but I just don't know how we would handle it here and...." She paused and looked into my eyes.

Usually Kathryn didn't struggle with anything. When she made a decision she would carry it out. But this was different, she was unsure. I felt that she truly wanted a baby, that she had already made the decision in her heart, she just needed a little reassurance. And because my mind had begun to clear up a little I found the right words to give her what she needed.

"We'll make it work, Kathryn."

Her face lit up and she smiled. She stood up, came around the table and sat down on my lap. She put her arms around me and said,  "But you have to want it too."

"Of course I want this too, Kathryn. I told you that I want to have children with
you and it's fine with me that we start a family now. I want you to be
happy…...I want us to be happy. This is the most wonderful declaration of
love you could make to me." I hugged her tightly and kissed her.

She had no idea what this did for me. She had made me the happiest

man in the universe. My mind was finally free of doubts about us and our future. Though we had been together for nine months my fears of losing her had lingered. I hadn't been able to trust that this relationship would be forever. A part of me had always thought that someday, something might happen to tear us apart.

"I love you." I said.

I didn't really know how we would handle it, but we'd been through so many far more difficult situations the past years that I was sure at that moment that we would find a way.

She smiled at me and said, "I love you, too."



After our shifts we went to sickbay and had the Doctor remove our boosters.
"It could take some time before you become pregnant, Captain" the doctor told us, "but I see no medical problem that would prevent you from having a child. Just be patient, let nature take its course, and give yourselves time. It could take a while."



We went to her quarters, ate dinner and worked on some reports. I yawned, it was late.

"Are you tired?" Kathryn looked up from her padd and asked.

"No, not really, but I am tired of working. Let's finish for tonight."

"Yes" she agreed. Then she stood up and walked towards the replicator, "Do you want one more cup of tea?"

"Yes, please."

She came back with two cups in her hands, coffee for her and tea for me, she handed my cup to me.

"Thank you." I paused and looked into her eyes, "Kathryn," I said, "I was thinking today that I would like us to move in together. We could easily remove the wall between our quarters. I've spent almost every night here for the past six months and I don't think it's necessary for me to continue to keep separate quarters. I know that you didn't want it at first, but when we have our child it would be a good idea to live together, don't you think?"

Kathryn smiled at me, "You have wonderful ideas, Commander."

"Well, that's part of my job." I smiled back.

She bent over and kissed me "Let's go to bed." she said.



After making love we lay there and talked. I lay on my side, my head propped on one hand while Kathryn lay on her back. I stroked her abdomen with my fingers. "What do you want, a boy or a girl?" I asked, looking into her eyes.

"I don't know." She answered, "It doesn't really matter to me I guess. The most important thing is for our little one to be healthy. What about you?"

I laughed, "Hey, I am a man, I would prefer a boy. I'll teach him to fly a shuttle, wood working and such things fathers do with sons."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Chakotay, I'm worried. What if we will have problems, what if I can't get pregnant."

"The Doc told us there will be no problems. Kathryn, I know you like to feel like you have control over everything, but this is one time you have to let things happen naturally. We just have to wait, try and see."



A few weeks passed and we continued trying to become pregnant. Kathryn was getting impatient and I tried to soothe her, but it didn't seem like we would be successful soon. A busy time for the ship and crew had begun. We flew through a very populated part of space and we had a lot of meetings with different species to ask for their permission to cross their territories. Kathryn and I worked double shifts almost everyday and when we didn't we were often scheduled for different shifts. We didn't have time to make love, we didn't even have time to talk, except about the ship.



Eventually we returned to empty space and we were finally able to relax a little. It was the week we were to celebrate our first anniversary, counted from the day when we had first kissed and I thought we needed a little break after all the work. So I decided we would spend an evening on the holodeck in Kathryn's favorite program, "Lake George".  I programmed a few additions, a shelter and a bathtub for Kathryn.

I kissed her on our anniversary morning until she awoke. "Happy First Anniversary." I said.

"Today?" she asked and blinked.

"Mmm hmm, one year ago today we kissed for the first time." I kissed her again. "I think it's worth a little celebrating tonight. I'll await you at 20:00 on holodeck one."

"What program?"

"It's a surprise. Just be on time. And, by the way, neither one of us is scheduled for duty until the day after tomorrow at 12:00. Tuvok will take over command until then." I kissed her once again.

"How did you explain it to him?"

"I told him the truth."

"Really? And that was enough?"

"He said he didn't understand but he accepts that celebrating anniversaries is important to humans."



That evening I awaited Kathryn on the holodeck. She was on time but still wearing her uniform when she arrived. I looked at her and shook my head.

"Sorry, I didn't have time to change." she said as she embraced me.

"Doesn't matter, you have to get out of it anyway."

She giggled "I thought we would have dinner first, I'm starving."

"I prepared a bath for you," I said and drew her with me into the shelter.



While she bathed I cooked dinner, vegetable lasagna and coffee ice cream. I placed candles on the table and laid a red rose at her place. After a while she came back, wearing her robe.

After looking at the table she said, "I don't think I'm properly dressed for the occasion."

"You're fine just the way you are. Sit down." I smiled.

We had a nice evening, talking and laughing about a lot of things. Kathryn yawned a few times. "Sorry, I don't know why I'm so tired. Seems I'm not really awake the last days."

"We've been busy the past several weeks. Let's go to bed."



We went into our bedroom and undressed. Kathryn changed into her nightgown and I removed my shirt. She lay down and I sat at the edge of the bed to pull off my boots. Kathryn embraced me from behind and stroked my chest.

"That was a wonderful evening. Thank you."

"You're welcome," I said and I took her hands in mine. "This has been the best year of my life. I've never been so happy before."

She smiled and asked, "Do you just want to talk or are you ready to kiss me now?"

I hurried to remove my pants and then took her into my arms and kissed her. She responded very passionately, running her fingertips up and down my back.

"I thought you were tired?"

"Not too tired."

I brushed my fingers along her collarbone. She closed her eyes. I kissed her cheek and then her neck down to her shoulder.

"That feels nice," she said.

"I'm sure you like it," I whispered and continued kissing my way down her arm and back up again until I reached her face. Then I saw that she was asleep. That wasn't the reaction I expected. "That ends the seduction," I thought. I was disappointed, but not angry. We had been under a lot of stress the past several weeks, she needed rest. Soon I felt asleep too.



I awoke hours later as Kathryn slipped back into bed.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I just needed to go to the bathroom." She cuddled against my chest. "I'm sorry that I fell asleep on you earlier."

"Doesn't matter."

"I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm constantly tired. Maybe I caught some kind of bug."

"You should visit the Doctor. You've been working too hard the past weeks and not eating regularly. Maybe you need some vitamins."

"It will be over soon, I'm sure."

"I'm not arguing with you about this, Kathryn. I'm scheduled to have my physical tomorrow afternoon and you're coming with me."

"Yes, Commander" she teased.

We snuggled close together and fell asleep again.



The next day after our shifts we went to sickbay.

"Good evening, Captain, Commander." The Doctor greeted us "What can I do for you."

"I'm here for my physical and I've convinced the Captain to let you check her because she's not feeling well."

"Well, that's a surprise, Captain."

Kathryn glared at him. I smiled to myself.

"What kind of symptoms do you have?" he asked as he took a tricorder from the table.

"I'm just constantly tired the last few days. I'm sure it's just a harmless bug or something like that. No need to worry."

"We'll see. Please lie down at the biobed."

Kathryn lay down and the Doctor ran his tricorder over her. I wanted to give Kathryn her privacy so I said, "I'll wait in your office, Doctor."

"No Commander, you should stay." Kathryn and I were confused. We looked first at each other and then at him.

The Doctor continued the exam. "Captain, may I ask you a question? When is your next menstruation period supposed to begin?"

Kathryn just stared at him.

"I mean when do you expect it to happen?"

"Tomorrow, why?"

"If my readings are correct, and I believe that they are, it won't begin tomorrow nor at any time in the coming eight months.

"What?"

"It seems, Captain, that you are pregnant." The Doctor delivered the news but was not the least bit impressed.

Kathryn looked at me as I went to stand beside her. We hadn't been expecting this. I took her hand in mine and squeezed it.

"You think....." Kathryn stammered. That was one thing I had never seen happen before, Kathryn at a loss for words. "...that I may be pregnant."

"That is what I said," the Doctor confirmed.

"But it can't be....we didn't often...." she stopped in the middle of the sentence.

"Captain, you're a scientist too. Certainly you're aware that it just takes one time. If this will help you, the baby you're carrying is 12 days old."

I grinned as I remembered what had happened 12 days ago.

                             
              ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We were in orbit around the Lagano Homeworld. They were a friendly race and Ambassador Rond had invited the entire senior staff for a two-day visit. We were to attend a dinner there and  then spend the night on the planet. We had accepted gladly, looking forward to the chance to relax after three busy weeks.

During dinner, Rond began to flirt with Kathryn. She did look so beautiful that evening; her hair was loose, she wore a nice sleeveless dress and she laughed the whole evening. But I wasn't jealous, I was proud that she belonged to me, although he didn't know. I was there as her First Officer, not her lover.

That night I lay awake a long time, thinking about the evening. Kathryn had looked so beautiful that if I weren't already so deeply in love with her I would have certainly fallen for her that night. I missed her. We hadn't had hardly any time for us during the previous three weeks; meetings, double shifts, different shifts...I sighed. Then I decided to sneak to her quarters. I arrived there without any trouble and went into her bedroom. I sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked her cheek. She awoke and opened her mouth to speak, but I put my fingers to her lips "Shhhh, it's me. I had to see you."

"But...."

"Don't worry, no one saw me."

I stood up and removed my clothing.

"What are you doing?"

"I don't usually wear my clothes to bed." I answered and continued.

"You can't sleep here."

"Who said anything about sleeping?" I answered.

She giggled, "I'm serious."

"So am I," I said as I laid down beside her and took her into my arms. "I've missed you so." I kissed her.

"We've been together the whole day."

"You know what I mean," I said, "The last three weeks we haven't had any time just for us. For kissing, cuddling and stuff like that."

"You're crazy."

"Right, I'm crazy about my beautiful Captain." I kissed her on her neck, I knew that was her weakness.

"But we can't, not here."

"Do you really want me to stop?"

"Yes. You have to."

"No one will know. I'll be gone before everyone else is awake, I promise.
I'm very experienced in "sneaking out", remember?"

She smiled.

I didn't stop. We made love for the next few hours. I wanted her so much that night. Then, in the early morning, I sneaked out of her room and back to my own.

                    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My mind returned to the present. I bent down and whispered into Kathryn's ear, "Remember the Lagano Homeworld?"

She smiled at me. "Yes, I remember *all* of it."

The Doctor ran his tricorder over her abdomen once again and said, "Everything seems to be all right...."

I heard nothing of what he said after that and I am sure Kathryn didn't hear it either. We just stared into each other eyes. I saw tears in Kathryn's eyes and felt some in my own too. "Kathryn, I love you," I said and kissed her and then repeated my words and kisses over and over.

"And I love you, Daddy," she said.

Daddy. I was going to be a Daddy. It had been such an abstract thought when we talked about it, but now it had happened. No longer was there just Kathryn and me, from now there would be a third person who would share its life with us. A little one created by Kathryn and myself. A new life.

We ordered the Doctor to keep our situation in confidence. We needed time to adjust to the news ourselves, before we could inform the crew.

The evening seemed to pass in slow motion. I couldn't keep my eyes off of Kathryn. I had visions about our future; Kathryn's abdomen swollen with our child, myself sitting with a baby in my arms, the two of us walking with our little boy between us. Later, we lay in our bed in the same positions as we had when we first talked about having a baby.

"It's incredible, Chakotay. I cannot see it, I cannot feel it, but I know it's there."
"Yes," I said and pulled Kathryn's nightgown up so that her abdomen was naked. I laid my hand on it.

"Hello little one. Welcome. This is your Daddy. You should know that we are very happy that you're here."

I placed a kiss on Kathryn's belly then cuddled myself against her shoulder, placed my leg over her legs and laid my hand on her abdomen. "Sleep well, Kathryn," I said.

"You too."



The next few days went by as usual, usual shifts, usual duties, usual things. Then one morning it began; as I awoke I heard Kathryn in the bathroom, she was heaving. I stood up and went to her. "Everything all right?" I asked.

Kathryn sat beside the toilet and nodded. She looked very pale and exhausted. I sat down beside her and took her into my arms. "Will you take today off?"

"No."

"You really should consider it, you don't feel well today. Give yourself time for your body to adjust to your condition."

"I am still the Captain."

"Yes, but you are also a woman who is pregnant."

She gave me one of her 'I don't want to discuss it anymore' looks. I decided that she certainly knew her body better than I did, and maybe she didn't feel as ill as she looked to me. I placed a kiss on her hair and stood up.

"I'm going to make myself a cup of tea, do you want one too?" I asked her.

"No, thanks."

I walked into our living room, replicated a cup of tea and sat down to read a few reports until Kathryn was ready. After a while she appeared, came over to me and laid a hand on my shoulder.

"I'm going to stop by sickbay and ask the Doctor for a hypospray and then I'll meet you on the bridge," she said and kissed me on the cheek.

"Okay, see you then." I answered.



During the following weeks I tried to help Kathryn whenever I could, but she made it difficult for me. We often quarreled during that time.

One day she felt very ill in the morning. She vomited a few times before our shift began. I suggested again that she should stay at home, but she told me the same thing she always did, "I'm the Captain and my place is on the bridge."

Well, I didn't want to argue with her. It had never been easy to do so anyway, but since she had become pregnant it seemed to be a lost cause to me. We went to the bridge and began our shift.

Kathryn looked very pale, though she had tried to cover it with make-up. After a while she handed the bridge over to me and went into her ready room. When she didn't come back after half an hour I decided to look in on her. I found her sitting beside the toilet in her bathroom.

"What's wrong Kathryn? I was scared. Do you need to go to sickbay?"

"No, everything's all right. I just need a moment."

"Everything is not all right. Come..." I took her arm and helped her to stand up. We went back into the main room and I placed her on the couch.

"You lay down here and I'll replicate some tea."

I turned to look at Kathryn as I waited for the tea. She just lay there she looked so sick. I was worried, even more than usual. I went back to her and handed her the teacup. She drank and I sat silently until she had emptied the cup.

"You can't go on like this anymore. You have to get more rest." I told her firmly.

"I'm the Captain..."

"Spare me the Captain speech, Kathryn. I won't accept your behavior anymore."

She sat up, "How dare you talk to me like that!"

"Oh, I dare more. From now on you'll stay at home on mornings like this to take care of yourself. If that doesn't work I'll start scheduling rest periods into your official duty logs."

"I won't allow you to treat me this way."

"And what are you planning to do? Throw me in the brig? I don't want to argue with you, but you have to realize that you're not responsible for just the ship anymore, you have to take care of yourself and our baby. If you don't listen to me now, then..."

"I knew it was a bad idea to have a relationship with my first officer," she interrupted me. That shocked me, I didn't know what to say.

"Do you regret it?"

"Maybe. I don't know."

I sat there, not knowing what to do or say, so I decided to do nothing.

Kathryn began to speak again. "I don't know what I'm feeling the past few weeks, I can't think straight anymore. I feel so bad, I could cry every day, then laugh. My stomach and my mind are whirling around at the same time. I never expected it would be like this. I hate it."

I took her into my arms and held her. After a while she said, "I don't really know how you can live with me now and always be so calm."

I laughed, "I'm not really calm, Kathryn, sometimes I could kill you, honest."

"I don't regret us," she said.

"I know," I answered.



After that day she stopped refusing to let me help her. I often sent her to her ready room for breaks during our shift, I took care to see that ate well and enough, although, she couldn't eat much, and I replaced her coffee with herbal tea.

She continued to suffer almost every day with morning sickness. The Doctor gave her a hypospray, but it didn't help much. In addition to the morning sickness she had a lot of mood swings. Usually Kathryn went home directly after our shift ended and I took care of things regarding the ship for about one more hour and then went home too. I was never quite sure what to expect when I entered our quarters. Sometimes I found Kathryn sitting and crying on the couch and I would hold her until her sobs subsided. At other times she embraced me and kissed me passionately, but sometimes she acted like she couldn't stand the fact that I had just kissed her. I missed the past when we cuddled on the couch, talking, kissing, touching. Sometimes it had led to wonderful lovemaking. Sometimes we just talked through half of the night.

One evening when I arrived home, asking myself as I entered what might await me tonight, I found Kathryn sitting at our dinner table. She had set it with a wonderful dinner lit by candles in the center. She stood up, came to me and hugged me.

"I'm glad you're home," she told me and kissed me. "Tonight I want to make up for the past few weeks. I know it hasn't been easy living with me lately, I'm so moody all the time, and it struck me today that it must be very difficult and confusing for you."

"You might say that," I answered.

She smiled at me, "Go and get out of your uniform and then we can have dinner."

I changed from my uniform into a shirt and trousers and then we sat together and ate. After dinner we went to our couch. I sat down and pulled Kathryn onto my lap and we talked. We spent half the night sitting there together. It reminded me of the days at the beginning of our relationship, when we would talk for hours without noticing how much time was really passing. I felt more content and relaxed than I had in months.



When Kathryn arrived in her twelfth week it was suddenly over. The morning sickness and the mood swings seemed to disappear overnight. She was almost constantly in a good mood and the paleness in her face was replaced by a rosy glow that looked extremely healthy and beautiful. Many of the crew members noticed it and paid her compliments, but no one knew the real reason, except B'Elanna.

She came into my office one day and the only thing she said was, "Congratulations."

"Congratulations? For what?" I asked her.

"Silly man, on your baby," She smiled at me.

"Umm....." I shifted in my seat and searched for the right answer.

"Don't bother trying to think up a good cover story," She laughed "I know I'm right."

"And may I ask how you found out?"

"It's obvious. The Captain has been looking more pale the last couple of months, you've been acting more worried about her than usual, and now she looks healthy in a way that only pregnant woman do."

I smiled.

"You are both happy, aren't you?" she asked.

"Yes, very happy."

"If the Captain needs advice or a woman to talk to about the pregnancy, I'm always here for her. And it's our secret, I won't tell anyone, not even Tom."

"Thanks B'Elanna."

"You're welcome. Give the Captain my congratulations, will you?"

"I will."



Kathryn began to eat more in the following weeks, and sometimes she ate very strange things, like strawberries with baked potatoes and B'Elanna's bloodpudding.

One day we were in her ready room eating lunch when she decided to have a big portion of bloodpudding followed by strawberries with cream,

I said, "Kathryn, I think you're not pregnant after all, but instead you have begun to mutate into some kind of alien, maybe partly Klingon. How can you eat that?"

"My baby wants it." She told me laughing.

"Maybe your baby wants it, but I'm not sure about mine. I'm beginning to feel sick just watching you eat it."



When Kathryn was in the beginning of her fourth month I found her in our quarters one day, standing in front of the mirror in our bedroom, wearing only her underwear. She had both hands on her abdomen.

"Hi," I said.

"Hi, come over here and look," She sounded really exited.

I looked at her abdomen, there was a slight swell. I laid my hand on it and in that moment I began to feel extremely happy. I could be a part of it now, I could feel it.

I had understood, of course, over the past few months, that Kathryn was pregnant. In addition to living with her uncharacteristic mood swings and the morning sickness, I had heard the tiny heartbeat and seen a picture of the fetus from the intra-uterine scan that the Doctor had performed. But I had always felt like an observer with little to see, everything was happening inside of Kathryn.  Somehow this changed things. It was more tangible, and I felt more a part of it now.

"I think it's time to announce our news to the crew," I said,  "Your regular uniform will soon be too tight to wear and I think it would be better to have this out in the open before you start wearing a maternity tunic."

"Yes, I agree, we tell them tomorrow. I think I'll take my bath now, could you make dinner?"

"Sure."



The next morning we called the senior stuff into the briefing room. Kathryn looked at me and smiled. I smiled back.

She began, "Well, everyone, Commander Chakotay and I would like to tell you something. You're all aware that we are involved?"

Everyone nodded.

"And now we are expecting a child." We both looked around the table. B'Elanna had a big smile on her face. Tom looked up at Kathryn with wide eyes. Harry was embarrassed, I think, and Tuvok raised an eyebrow, thought for a moment, and then said "Congratulations." Seven nodded her approval to Tuvoc's statement, and Neelix became so excited I actually thought for a moment that he might get up and dance a Talaxian Jig. Instead, he just kept repeating,  "Oh Captain, such wonderful news."

"Thank you," Kathryn answered. "I may need your help and support a little more than usual during the next few months, but in general nothing will change. I'll continue in my command of the ship for as long as I can, and then Chakotay will take over. Any questions?"

We looked around again. Everyone shook her heads.

"Okay. That's all for now. Dismissed." Kathryn turned toward her ready room, but then she looked back with a grin on her face and said, "By the way, Tom, you can stop staring at me, there's nothing to see yet." She laughed and Tom blushed and said, "Yes Ma'am. Sorry."



One morning, a few weeks later our day began as it usually does; Kathryn rose first and went to shower. When she returned and began to dress I took my turn in the bathroom. I came back to see her standing in front of the mirror, staring at her reflection. She was wearing a maternity uniform for the first time.

"It looks odd, don't you think?" she asked.

"No, I don't." I stepped behind her and put my arms around her waist so that my hands were resting on her abdomen. "Soon you will fill the empty space."

"I've never seen a Captain in a maternity uniform," she laughed.

"Me neither, but there's a first time for everything."


It was Tom Paris' birthday a few days later and there was to be a celebration at Sandrine's. Kathryn had just finished dressing for the party when I came into our quarters. She wore a light dress with lots of flowers.

"What do you think?" she asked.

"Beautiful," I said.

"That's what you always say. I want an honest answer. Do you think I look
fat?"

"No."

"But my tummy looks so big, it shows in this dress." She rubbed her hands over the visible swell.

"So? You're pregnant and there's no reason to hide it. You should be as proud as I am." I wrapped my arms around her from behind and laid my hands on her abdomen, "And besides, I like the fact that everyone can see that you're carrying my baby in here." I smiled.



About four weeks later we sat in our quarters, I was on the couch with Kathryn on the floor between my legs so that I could massage her neck. She moaned.

"What's wrong? Did I hurt you?"

"No, I think our little one moves."

"Really?"

"Yep, there it is again," she said, her hands on her abdomen.

I moved to sit beside her on the floor. "Let me feel."

Kathryn took my hand and placed it on her belly. I could feel a soft flutter. "Wow, it's really exciting," I said.

She looked into my eyes. "I do really love you, you know."

"And I love you," I said and leaned over to kiss her. It was a soft, gentle one.

"Do you still find me attractive?" she asked.

"What?"

"I mean, do you still feel passion for me?"

"Of course, Kathryn."

"Why don't you act like you feel it?"

"What do you mean?" I was really surprised by her questions.

"You haven't really touched me in weeks and your kisses are nice, but nothing more."

The first trimester the Doctor had told us to be careful, so as to avoid any problems. Kathryn didn't feel well anyway back then and the truth was that we had only made love a few times since we learned about her pregnancy.

"Kathryn, I'm afraid. I don't know, I don't want to hurt you or the baby. You didn't feel so well the first few months and now, well, I thought it would be uncomfortable for you. But I still feel passion for you. You're the sexiest woman I've ever met. I would be honored to make love to you whenever you want."

"Could I interest you in a few hot kisses tonight then?" She asked and smiled seductively at me at me.

"Always," I said and began to kiss her with all the passion I had been suppressing over the past months.



I was fascinated by the changes that were happening to Kathryn. I don't think I had ever before found her so beautiful. She was totally woman now. Not that she wasn't very feminine before, but it was different somehow. She was round and soft with warm eyes full of the emotion which she used to keep hidden. I had always loved watching her, but the past few weeks she had became an irresistible view.  When she stood naked in our bedroom I would look at her, at the way her breasts had become more rounded, her body soft and voluptuous. I loved to touch her, to lay my hands on her abdomen. It was exciting to be with her in this way, it wasn't sexual, it was spiritual.

That isn't to say I didn't lust for her. Of course I found her exciting in that way too, and since our talk on the night when she asked me if I was still attracted to her, we had begun to make love more often. But I was uncomfortable with it. It was a new experience for both of us. I'd never made love to a pregnant woman before, except of course Kathryn in the early months, but that was before her body had changed so much.

This was different. I could see that our baby was in her body, I could feel it moving and I just couldn't imagine that she really enjoyed our love making. We always took a lot of time, more for me than for her, she was turned on with the first kiss, and I was more afraid than she was.

"I won't break," she always told me, laughing when I hesitated too long, or stopped to ask, "Did I hurt you?" in the middle of our passion.

"You make it very difficult for me to enjoy," she said one time after we'd finished making love, "It's not fun when you're so tense."

She was right, I couldn't relax.

"Talk to the Doctor. He'll tell you that you won't harm me or the baby and that making love can be very relaxing and exciting for a pregnant woman."

"Kathryn," I said, "You know that I love you and that I love to make love to you, but…….I can't relax. I am so afraid of hurting you."

"Don't be. I have always enjoyed making love with you and that hasn't changed," she assured me.

I talked to the Doctor the next day and he convinced me that there's nothing to be afraid of. I still wasn't really sure about it, but at least I was able to relax from that day on.



Early in the pregnancy the Doctor had asked us if we would like to know the gender of our baby. Kathryn had been curious to know at first, but we decided to wait until the birth. We often discussed baby names. One night as we lay in bed our baby was very restless, moving around and kicking. Kathryn was lying on her back and I had my hand on her abdomen.

"I'm sure you'll get the boy you're hoping for," Kathryn laughed, "Only a male baby could be this lively, always kicking and boxing."

"Maybe not," I replied, "It could be a girl who will be a scientist like her Mom and she's just exploring the environment."

Kathryn became serious, "We do really need to find a name."

"Yes," I agreed, "What do you think of David for a boy and Nathalie for a girl?"

"Hmmmm, I don't know," she thought about it for a moment, "I like David for a boy, but for a girl I'd like.....Chumani."

I stared at Kathryn and she returned my gaze but didn't say anything. It took a while before I was able to speak.

"How do you know?" I asked her.

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