Midnight on a dark and stormy world, the wind blows and the t=
hunder rumbles as a
crosstime riff opens in the sky releasing Excaliburs train in mid-air, hu=
rrling towrd a great castle
pearched perelously on a Mountain cliff.
Within, works A doctor Alstair Stewart on his latest creation=
Meanwhile back in the normal dimension of time and space Logan =
has finally gotten fed up
with his stupid box and decides to open it. He opens it only to find hims=
elf and the X-men getting
sucked into another dimension. They land none to gently. "OOWW!! That hur=
t damn it!!!" Warren
exclaims as Logan drops on his head, "Great Logan be impatient and look w=
here it gets you. Stupid
miserable $@#$@$ little runt!!!" The X-men look around to find the box ly=
ing a couple feet away,
and themselves standing on a rocky cliff. "What the heck?" Scott mutters =
as a light appears out of
nowhere blinding them all, "What is this a near death experience?" "NO!!!=
", Hank exclaims, "It's that
train barreling down on us!!!" Some of the X-men choose that moment to sc=
ream as...
AS a train appears and drops down on to them. Jean thinking quick=
ly erects a TK field around
teh train holding in place. Logan smiles and says, "Well, it if it isn't =
the little red head that could."
Beads of sweat drop from JEan's forehead as she slowly loses her grip on =
the train. Storm flying up
commands winds to begin to lift the train up and away from them and blow =
it away at a far distance.
Storm lands near the X-Men and discusses with Scott what plans should be =
done next. Psylocke
suddenly extends her psi-blade and Logan pops out his bone claws. "We got=
company kiddos!" A
portal pops open and out steps Amanda Sefton. The X-Men sigh with relief.=
With her are Kylun,
Cerise, Feron, Rahne, Piotr, Douglock and Micromax. Daytripper speaks, "W=
e can't have an
Excalibur story without ALL the members of the team, past and present." L=
ogan sniffs again and
quickly runs and tackles Amanda, "Get down girl!" The members that telepo=
rted with her suddenly
trnasform into Warwolves and ...
The warwolves look over all of them smugly as they state..."We are =
here for Phoenix...do not
intervene." At this point the X-men look at one another and say, "Which P=
hoenix. Phoenix one was
a cosmic entity, possessing Jean's body. Phoenix two was Rachel. Now ther=
e is Phoenix three
which is Jean, so it is sort of Phoenix one as well as three and she is s=
tanding right beside you. How
are we supposed to not interfere when we have no idea who you are after?"=
The warwolves look at
each other and then at the X-men..."Hold that thought, we'll be back late=
r. We are going to go get
Mojo to clear this one up for us." They then teleport away muttering abou=
t the miserable mess that
has become the Phoenix name. The X-men look at each other smiling in reli=
ef. Meanwhile on the
train with Excalibur...
While back on Mojo World the warwolves have returned to report and ge=
t imput from Mojo
about this Phoenix deal. Mojo starts yelling at them about their monument=
al stupidity. "I want
Phoenix!!!" He exclaims. The warwolves then ask him which one and explain=
the whole complicated
mess. Mojo then gets as confused as them and says, "Fine then!!! Get them=
all!!! Oh and get those
X-babies on the phone!!! They have a contract!!!" His head of affairs the=
n looks at him and says
"Um...sir the X-babies are gone. They just up and disappeared on us." Moj=
o's outraged scream
follows the warwolves departure from the homeworld. Meanwhile back on ear=
th in the alternate
dimension...
The X-men are trying to figure out what to do when they hear some very =
creative German curses
coming from inside the train. They quickly open it to find Excalibur thro=
wn all over the thing and
slightly ticked off to land so ungently. Kitty looks up from underneath B=
rian and sees the X-men.
"Great! Another day another dimension. Look guys, Logan is even uglier he=
re." The rest of
Excalibur look from their different postions and see Logan and the X-men.=
"Great Katchen, are you
people good guys or bad guys?" The X-men look on baffled until Jean (for =
a change) makes the
connection. "They are from the past guys. They don't know who we are...we=
ll sort of...oh, you
know what I mean." The X-men then look on annoyed because they hate this =
past is the future time
loop things. There is a sudden disturbance as they hear a high pitched vo=
ice saying, "Hi ya'll.
Uh..look we need your help. Mojo is after us and we need to get out of ou=
r contract if ya know
what ah mean." The X-men then turn around to see the X-babies, but they a=
re not alone. They
managed to show up with...
Suddenly, and without warning, Wolverine's Box begins to glow again as al=
l but the crosstime-caper
core members of Excalibur are zapped away to parts unknown.
"Zutimful! that was strange!" says Nightcrawler. I recognized most of the=
m, yet I don't believe any
of them wore a familier costume." "The War-Wolves excluded of course."
"I know what you mean." mentions Shadowcat. It would be nice to s ee the =
X-men again if we ever
gie out of this dimention hopping mess."
At that point, the train slams into the Castle wall sending Captain Brita=
in hurling into first igore,
whom is carring a duck, then bolth the Captain and the duck into an energ=
y field.
"Oh, Man! this is going to get messy!" Cries Igore ducking for cover as a=
brilliant burst of light from
the explosion fills the room.
The captain adnd the duck have been merged, and Meggan is not happy! =
Gene looks out over all the Marvel writers and editors =
(icluding Stan Lee himself) and
grins. "Congrads guys and gals we did it. We took over Marvel!!! Now to s=
et things straight
here!!!" =
Dracula looks over the Marvel writers with a gun and st=
ates calmly, "Get on the phone
and get Claremont too Gene!!! Damn it these people can do nothing right!!=
!"
Jon and the other members look on as well smug in the k=
nowledge that we've won this
round. Obsidian comes in and yells..."Rewrite time people...these Flashba=
ck issues have got to be
redone while we're at it. *So says the dark heart of comics Obsidian*!!!"=
I am looking at them and stating our demands for their =
release..."Okay...we want
CLAREMONT back you $##@$!!! We also want Lobdell to get some talent or to=
get out!!! We
want the X-women to quit looking like bimbos!!! We want contiuity, consis=
tancy, quality, and
characterization DANG IT!!!" The writers are at the same time getting pum=
meled by me with a
rubber chicken, and I am pretty preoccupied when Lady Luck nails me in th=
e ribs with her elbow.
"Yo sis, your on here!!!" I look up in surprise and smi=
le, "Oh!!! Er...hi everyone. Give me
a minute here and I'll explain the game." I then smack Lobdell unconsciou=
s with the rubber chicken
and walk up calmly with it thrown over my shoulder.
"Okay here is the premise of the game. We are going to =
prove to Marvel that we can do
a better job writing then they can (it won't be that hard). We are redoin=
g the Flashbacks our way.
At the same time, we can wreck romance as I introduce a new idea for a Fl=
ashback. It is for Cable
because the last one didn't make any sense. My idea is how it should have=
been done (ego I know).
It is going to be the Flashback of when Cable met Domino. You know it was=
n't a normal meeting,
so have fun with it. Feel free to wreck...er...rewrite the other Flashbac=
ks while we're at it. Let's
have some fun here. Drac put the gun down for the time being okay. I don'=
t think Claremont is
home right now, and the rest of you put the tar and feathers away for now=
=2E We can use them later!!!
Have fun everyone and Excelsior!!! I shall start the story and until next=
time Shadowcat Rules!"
A long time ago...a seedy South American bar...
Domino is undercover and is currently sitting on a man's lap that she'd rather not be sitting on. He smells a lot worse then some of the nastier places she has been in.
Suddenly there is a disturbance...Domino looks up to find a white-haired woman, that is shooting wind and lightning from her fingertips! She jumps off of that stinky guys lap and he is knocked to the ground by the wind. She reaches for her gun but the wind blows it away. Domino is thrown to the ground! the woman says, "I am the Shadow King! This is Ororo Munroe. I have taken control of her body! Now, there is someone in here that I need to talk to!I think he knows who he is!" A man stands up. "I am here." the white haired man says. His name, Nathan Daysping Askani'Son Summers.
He then smiles upon noticing Ororo's figure. He turns to see Domino on her butt on the floor. "Pardon me, Ms. Munroe." He goes over to Domino and helps her up, =
"I'm Nathan." She blushes, "Call me Beatrice." He smiles, "Excuse me while I deal with her."
Domino resumes sitting on the man's lap. He places his arm tightly around her waist. "Welcome back." smiles Tyler, "I see you met pop." Nathan walks over to the bar, "May I get you a drink, Ms. Munroe?" Storm smiles.
Cable looks over to the bartender and winks. Kane X nods to the wink. He turn and asks Storm, "What would you like?"
Storm in a think manly Arabic accent says, "A gin and tonic." Kane smiles, "I'll get right on it." He goes to make the drink and secretly puts in it a small vial of sodium pentothol. Being an enormous, glutton, the Shadow King, in Storm's body, downs the drink like a shot, slams the glass down and orders another. Kane gives him/her a double, double pentothol. Storm/Shadow King downs this one a bit more slowly, gulping the first half and sipping at the rest while munching from a bowl of dates.
"So," Cable says, examining Storm's face, "You said you were looking for me. You're a bit young to be in a bar, much less picking up older men (Storm would be about 15 at the time of Flashback). What can I do for you?"
Storm pops down another date and motions to Kane that her drink is empty. Turning toward Cable she says, Screen change to the Flashback of Alex Summers...changes to his first date. He pulls up in front of the house that his friend gave him to pick up his blind date. He gasps in horrified fascination when a knockout blond climbs into the car. She has an unnatural gleam in her eyes and a skull pendant pinned to the front of a choker she is wearing. She looks at Alex and smiles..."Hi you must be Alex. Oh, I can see looking at you that we're going to have a killer of a time tonight. Just for the sake of not knowing each other you can call me Malice and I'll call you...?" Stupdified he answers,"Ah...Havoc I guess. We'll probably create plenty of it tonight babe." She then laughs as they pull away from the curb...
Deep from within his lare, Mr. Sinister watches the procedings between Alex and the Malace host with intrest. "Go get 'em Malice." Grins Sinister, soon I will not only have yet another Summers under my control, but a XXX-men tape to market thus funding my research!" he chuckles.
Back in the bar...
Storm/the Shadow King is about to tell all about why he/she is there when suddenly Mr. Rictor comes through the door with a big gun and sees Cable. *translated from Spanish* "You!!! You are the rat that killed my cousin. Die you bastard." He then points the gun at Cable. Cable having no idea what he is talking about never the less quickly acts by quickly shouting, "Okay everybody this is a sting. Federal Marshal!!! Hands in the air, guns on the table and no one gets hurt!!!" He then dives behind the bar (being sure to grab his beer on the way over) and throws Ororo behind it as well, where she promptly passes out. Kane looks over at Cable some-what annoyed and asks,
"Now what?" Nate looks up at the ceiling sipping his beer and shouts (while everyone is reloading),
"Gee isn't it nice of our current Nark to be here with us. Now we can bring all you criminals in!"
Domino who is in the middle of all of this quickly looks around and shouts, "It is that Rictor creep, I saw him talking to them outside." The offender is quickly shot by a lot of guns. Then another patron looks at Domino and says, "Wait a minute!!! I didn't see him talking to them and I was with him all day!!! You lie!!!" Guns then point at Domino but she is already behind the bar with Kane and Cable by that time. The gunfire quickly starts up again and Dom looks at Cable,
"So now what?" Cable looks at them, nursing his beer and states, "Hell, I don't know we'll think of something."
Meanwhile...
Malice and Alex drive to a diner in the city. A black waittress takes their order and goes back into the kitchen area. She stares at them with an odd curiousity. She heads into the ladies wash room and then teleports into a secret room in the sewer. "What do you have to report, Fatale?" asks Dark Beast. she smiles, "Prelate Summers is in the diner with some blond who is coming off as a mutant, but she is unfamiliar." Beast smiles, "not to worry. Prelate Summers will be ours some day." He looks back, "Won't he Emma." He laughs as young Emma is bound and gagged over in a corner crying in a torn white dress.
As the fire fight continues, Domino And Kane try to hold off the other occupants of the bar. "Uhhm, Cable could yu help us out just a little." asked Dom. "Damn!" "Are you hurt Cable?" Asked Kane as he ran ovewr to check for wounds. "No I'm out of beer and that white h=
aired chick is waking up." In a sunny playground in Califonia Jubilation Lee and Angelo Espinoza get in a fight over who
is going to go down the slide first...
But the fight is soon over as Jubilation smiles and says," Fine, you go first." She shoves Angelo
down the slide face first.
Little Jubilee is laughing as Angelo skids down the slide.
Back at the ranch....
Shadowcat Rules! are getting fed up with this.
Suddenly the Shadow King becomes conscious and asks Cable in between gun fire, "Askani Son
why don't you use your powers on them." Cable looks at him/her and states, "Look I don't know
what kind of quack you are but I don't have any powers yet. That was just a stupid screw up on
Marvel's part. Besides that, who needs mutant powers. They're for sissys I got myself a big gun and
a lot of plasma grenades." With that Cable quickly takes the pin out of one of the later and throws it
over the bar. There is humongous explosions as the grenade sets off a lot of the alcohol in the place
and things start really getting ugly (blood guts and stuff). Domino looks over at Cable and says, "I
am impressed!" "As am I child. I now know I made the right decision in coming here." States the
Shadow King. He/she looks over at Cable and says, "I came here because I got a deal for you. I
am willing to get rid of Stryfe if you will come work for me." Cable looks at him and grins a
somewhat insane grin, "No way!!! I don't think so!!!", he says, "Stryfe is mine, and I am going to
have the pleasure of ripping off his head and drinking my pleasure from his skull. No one else is
going to have that pleasure!!!" The Shadow King looks at him and shakes his/her head..."You mean
to tell me you are turning me down. You will regret this, I will destroy all you care for for this
affront." Cable looks at him/her and grins, "Too late. Ice bucket head already did in everyone I care
about." The Shadow King then lurches to his/her feet and staggers for the door mumbling about
how crazy all these people are. Tylor stalks after him/her a leery look on his grimy face. About two
minutes later there is the sound of thunder and a scream of pain. Domino looks out the window and
winces. "I don't think he'll be doing anything to anyone for awhile." She then looks at Cable and
asks, "So, what do I call you?" Cable then grasps her hand and smiles. "Call me Cable, or better yet
Nate. I think we are going to be good friends!"
Meanwhile...Alex and Malice had one hell of a night on the town. The authorities had to be called in
because somehow they got involved in a situation dealing with a duck, a bellhop, a chicken truck
and a harem. Alex still will not talk about that date to this day.
As for Jubilee and Angelo...Well Jubilee proved she was queen of the slide and really showed him
didn't she.
I smile a big smile and look over at everyone. "See, we didn't even make it that long and we're still
better then these losers." Jon now holding a gun resembling something Cable might use then looks at
Lobdell who is starting to regain consciousness. "Hmmm...do you think we should just shoot him
and put him out of everyone's misery?" She looks rather violent, so I say "Nah...let him live we can
stick him in the Archie comics section or something. Ooooh...or better yet on a new Barney
comic!!!" At that point Lobdell lets out a terrified scream and begs for mercy. Meanwhile Drac is on
the phone with Claremont telling him we'll give him anything he wants as long as he comes back to
the fold. Stan Lee is now ungaged and looking at us somewhat impressed..."Okay how about this
true believers..." He says, "I'll put some of you on as Marvel employees to keep good quality books
going out." We think about it and decide what the hell anything is an improvement. Stan then names
Mike and Gene chief editors, Drac head negotiator, Obsidian as assistant editor and Jon as back up
negotiator. Josh is even hired on as a new writer (because he is a hell of a lot better then what they
got now). Me...I am still coordinator of games on the BB and still losing what little sanity I have left
(Hee,hee...I'm not insane, just odd), although Lady Luck is hired onto the letters page and is printing
some actually critical stuff, instead of empty compliments. Source is knocked up from lowly Marvel
employee to a story coordinator and editor for one of the books. Of course other people are put
into postitions of power too.
Well there you have it people. If we ever take over Marvel, let's hope it goes that well and we don't
end up in prision. Hey, we're smart and resourceful...it could happen!!! Well, until next game...
Shadowcat Rules!
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