Title: Ghosts
Author: Snack Pack
Rating: R
Category: A
Spoilers: Talitha Cumi, Paper Hearts
Keywords: Character Death
Summary: Mulder and Scully find Samantha and so much more. Authors Note: Thanks to Purplecoral for support and critique. This is my masterpiece!
Disclaimer: The song lyrics that are written toward the end are from the song "Why I Don't Believe in God" By Everclear. The Characters of FM, SM, TM, DS, CSM, and WS don't belong to me, but to CC and 1013 productions. Don't sue me.
I am barely able to save enough baby sitting money for a CD, let alone a lawsuit!

Ghosts By Snack Pack

Scully***
Journal- Here's another entry for you. I don't know why I even address it "journal" I should address it "Dr. Markus", since he's the one who reads it. You know, Mulder's poisoned my mind against shrinks. I was *willing* to see a therapist at first, but all of Fox's bitchin' and moanin' has brainwashed me. Well, the good doctor wants me to talk about "it". It's been two months now, I think Fox and I can talk about it finally. Hopefully. I remember we were in our new office. It was bigger than our old one- had my own desk, my name on the desk. I remember thinking "I'm really his partner not the chick who spies on him". It was a good thought. Well, we were gonna go see Skinner about our next assignment. Some occult worship something-or-other. Well, Mulder got a call. From his mother. About Samantha. We rushed to Connecticut as fast as we could. Mulder was silent the whole way. I thought of the hearts and his dream. And when he thought the clone *was* Samantha, and he still sacrificed her for me. I feel guilty for putting him in that situation. I could have avoided it. I could have done something. Anyway, those are old ghosts. Time to move on to new ghosts, eh? We got to her house. She was totally calm. I hold so much respect for her. She has dealt with more shit than she has to, but she is such a warm and loving person. I guess I have respect for the whole Mulder clan- except for his father. Bastard. She had gotten a frantic call from Samantha. It was terrifying. You know what Fox says? He says I can't just tell a story without adding a side note of my own. And he's right. I relate to Mrs. Mulder. We have both lost daughters. A pain like that it's... indescribable. God damn, she is just an amazing woman. Mulder is so much like her. Anyway, she had gotten a frantic call...

Mulder***
That damn doctor keeps giving me these looks. He is one patronizing son of a bitch if I ever did see one. He looks up at me from my journal that he's reading. In my last entry I had to write about it. I had no idea what to write. He wouldn't let me see Dana's. Damn him. He is so fucking smug. I just keep reminding myself that I'm doing this for her. So she can get over this. So I can get over this. He closes my journal. "You didn't finish your entry, Fox." I want to punch him. "Mulder. Call me Mulder." "Well, Mulder?" "Well what?" "Why didn't you finish your entry?" I shrugged. "I dunno." He sighed at me. This bring brings back a lot of memories of my dad. "Where were you, Fox? Why are you home from school so late?" He'd ask me drunkenly, a glass of Scotch in his hand. Always. Always that glass of Scotch in his hand. I'd shrug. "I dunno." "Probably at the library, huh? Ya little book worm. Now I know you weren't out with girls, huh? No, not you. You really don't carry the tradition of the Mulder men, huh?" "I dunno." I would shift nervously as I took this abuse. "I remember when I was your age... played football... was gonna go to college. Got in the army, though. You gonna be in the army, Fox?" "I dunno." "Yah, better that you don't. Scrawny kid like you, you don't have the build." He would lean toward me. "Yer the brains of the fam'ly. Got that from *my* side of the fam'ly tree. Musta inherited yer mother's cowardice. You keep bein' the lil' book worm ya are, alright Fox?" "Sure." Little did he know I was out smokin' chronic with my friends. I chuckled a little at the thought. My father, the drunk bastard who never knew a thing about me. "Mulder?" "Hmm?" "Would you please finish your entry?" "I will. In time." He handed me my journal. "Try to get it done this week, huh? Dana has progressed quite nicely, I'd like to see you to get as far as you can with this. Maybe then some of your "ghosts" might not haunt you like they are." "Fine. Is that all?" He nodded, and I was off.

Scully***
I stood in the kitchen, drinking a glass of wine, waiting for Fox to get home. He had his session with Dr. Markus today. They were going to talk about "it". I watched Mulder as he wrote his entry. He was so frustrated. He sat at the desk with his glasses on, staring down at the notebook, pen in hand. He rubbed his eyes under his glasses, like he always does when he has a headache. He sat there for two hours. He wrote for maybe ten minutes, total. I want to know what he thinks about all this. I want to be there to comfort him, like I've wanted to so many times when we were working on the X-Files. But I can't. We both have to work this out separately for now. I listen as the door opens and closes. I come out of the kitchen and find Fox sitting on the couch, hunched over, head in his hands. "Fox?" He looks up at me, his hazel eyes tired and blood-shot. "Hey, Dana." He says hoarsely. "What's wrong?" I ask as I approach him and take a seat next to him. He sighed. "Nothing. Just that arrogant bastard of a shrink is breathing down my neck for me to talk about..." He shook his head. "I thought this process was supposed to be gradual." "You still can't talk about it with him?" He shook his head and sighed deeply. "Can you talk about it with me?" He met my eyes. "I dunno, Scully." "Alright. I won't push you."

Mulder***
I watched Scully at dinner that night. She seemed hurt. I know she wants me to talk. It's just that I can't. I am watching her sleep. God, she is so beautiful. I would do anything for her. Kill. Die. Live. I have to get this off my chest. I look over to the clock. 3:26. I can't wake her up. I get out of bed slowly, not to wake Dana. I walked out into the living room slowly. I left my journal on top of the bookcase. I pick it up, and grab a pen out of the holder. I walked back into our bedroom, flip on the dim desk light, and sat. It's time to write about my ghosts.

***
We arrived at my mother's house around noon. She ushered Scully and me inside and sat us down in the living room. "Mom, what's wrong?" I asked. Her hands were shaking as I grasped them. "Oh, Fox," She said, her gray eyes brimming with tears. "She called, Fox. She called me. My baby's coming home." "Samantha? Samantha called you?" My mom nodded. "What did she say, Mom?" "She said that she's been trying to find us for a long time. And that she wants to come home." "Where is she, Mom?" "She's in New York, Fox. She sounded so young- she would be thirty- four now. She sounded like she couldn't be more than fifteen. You have to find her. I have to know what is happening to her. *What* happened to her. On the phone, she seemed hurried, and she hung up very suddenly... please, you have to find her." My mom began to cry then. I stood up and hugged her. One thought plagued me: Is it really her this time?

Scully***
We left Mrs. Scully's house and Mulder was immediately on the phone booking two seats on the next flight to New York. I tried to talk some sense into him. "Mulder, it could be a clone. They could be trying to trap us again." "Well, we're just going to have to take that chance, now aren't we?" "We?" "Scully, I need you on this." "Remember what happened before? I was nearly killed, you were deceived again... why should we believe it this time?" "Because my mom does." So we booked ourselves on a flight to New York, having no idea where to look first.

Mulder***
I put my pen down and turned off the lamp. That's as far as I'm going to get tonight. There was so much more to write, though. Practically a novel! I climbed back into bed slowly and fell asleep.

Scully***
I sat at breakfast that morning with Fox. He was up early this morning and cooked (sort of- does microwaving pancakes count?) breakfast. "Have to keep up your strength, Dana." He said as he put my plate in front of me. He always has this look in his eyes now. He's truly happy now. I thought. He kneeled down by my side and put his hand on my stomach. I looked down at him. I never thought I'd see Fox Mulder like this. He is a changed man. He was so different two months ago.


Mulder had booked two seats to LaGuardia that day. We got on our flight at about 3, I think. He was nervous, I could tell. I couldn't say anything to him that would comfort him. Perhaps that is how I earned my nickname (Ice Queen). I have absolutely no idea how to act in an emotional situation. We sat through the flight, wordless. I wondered where we were going to begin. Mulder had asked some people at the bureau to trace any calls that come in to his mother's house, in case Samantha called again. But we had no lead. Why would Samantha sound young? She should be in her thirties by now! I wondered. We landed at LaGuardia shortly. I kept looking at Mulder's face. He was putting on a front, of course. Trying to play it cool. He didn't want to get disappointed again. Emotion. Show emotion. I kept reminding myself. I remember putting my hand on his arm. I remember it because he gave me this look. Not a bad look. I don't know what kind of look. I just remember wanting to hug him. But no. Technically, we were on duty. Wouldn't be appropriate. We rented a car and drove to a Holiday Inn. After we checked in, Fox's cell phone rang. It was someone at the Bureau. Samantha had called again. They traced the call- a phone booth downtown. Mulder had asked to speak to his mother. I heard the conversation only from one side- his mother was terrified for Samantha. She was in obvious danger. It was sometime after dark when Mulder and I left the hotel. He was speaking so fast I could barely understand him. "It's her Scully, I know it is." He kept repeating over and over. We reached the phone booth. It was in a pretty bad part of town. Graffiti, gang insignia, prostitutes. Mulder had a look of sheer terror on his face. I know what he must have been thinking. This is where my sister was? We walked down the block, searching for any sign of her. We questioned a few prostitutes- many of them teenagers. Such a shame. This one girl, Stephanie, if memory serves, IDed her. I remember exactly what she said. It must have broken Fox's heart. "Oh, yeah. Sammie. Yah, she's real popular 'round here. She always seemed scared though. Probably of getting arrested. Anyway, she got in this guy's car 'bout an hour ago." She took a long drag of her cigarette, and blew the smoke in Mulder's face. He ignored it and continued to question her. Samantha really didn't live anywhere, she didn't have a pimp, and she drank occasionally and did drugs. We stayed there and waited for awhile for her to return, but it was obvious that Mulder was becoming uneasy. I felt so badly for him. I suggested that we leave, and he agreed.

Mulder***
I never pictured Samantha as a prostitute. At first I thought that Stephanie was mistaken. No, not my sister. Samantha would never sell herself like that. But she had been. We went back to the hotel. At about two in the morning, we got a call from Stephanie (I had given her my card). She told me that Samantha had returned and she was hurt somehow. I asked her if she had told her that we had come. She said "Why would I do that? She doesn't need to know the feds are lookin for her right now." I told her that I was her brother. I woke up Dana. If Samantha was hurt, I wanted her to take a look at her. We raced back to that street corner. My heart had nearly stopped. I think I was crying. We got there and -

I dropped my pen. No, I can't go there yet.

Scully***
I got out of the shower and got dressed. I was beginning to show and my jeans didn't fit. I walked out into the living room and Mulder was at the desk, writing in his journal. He had been writing late last night, too. I know I should be happy that he is finally getting this off his chest, but it hurts me a little that he can't talk about this with me. We used to be like this all the time. No matter how close we got; it was a rarity when we were totally honest with one another; when we could totally confide in each other. And it never bothered me this much before. It's probably because now I love him.

Mulder***
Two days later, I had another little session with Dr. Markus. I had written anything since that morning when I just couldn't write anymore. He took my journal and began to read. "Well, well, Fox. Seems as though you have made some progress." I grin and bear it. "Yeah, seems so." He closed my journal and put it on his desk. He hunched himself over, staring at me square in the eyes. "How difficult is it, Fox, for you to talk about this?" I considered the question, but he starting speaking again before I could respond. "Too difficult to even talk about it with Dana- the woman who went through it all with you?" "Did she say something?" "That's not the question at hand. Why can't you talk about this with Dana? You love her, don't you?" "I really don't think this is any of your business." "Nevertheless..." "Yes, I love her!" "Before you can be completely rid of these ghosts, you need to practice open communication." "Whaddya mean communication? I communicate plenty in my journal!" "Only because I make you!" He lowered his voice. "Talk to Dana. Lord knows she trying to talk to you."

Mulder***
We got there and Stephanie was on her haunches, hovering over this girl, trying to soothe her. Scully and I exchanged a glance, and briskly walked over to them. Stephanie looked up. "Hey." She said. "Here's the girl you've been lookin' for." She backed away slowly and stood up. A girl sat in the shadows. She was covering her nose, and tears welled in her eyes. Her hair was short and brown, and her hazel eyes looked up at me. I knew then that it was Samantha. "Samantha?" I asked, ignoring the glaring fact that here was my sister, only four years younger than I, in the body of a teenager. I kneeled down beside her. She had been beat up pretty badly from the looks of her. "It's me, Samantha. Fox." I said. I don't remember exactly what happened after that. I hugged her, I think, and we both started crying. I was ecstatic. It was her. I knew it was. Dana and I took her back to the hotel. I asked her so many questions. "What happened to you?" "Where have you been?" "What do you remember?" She told me that she would tell me in the morning, that now she just needed to get cleaned up and hit the hay. Scully offered her hotel room to Samantha, and that's where she stayed. Scully cleaned and dressed her wounds. Her nose had been bleeding, she had a cut on her shoulder, and her leg was bruised. She took a bath and went straight to bed. I hugged her tightly and told her how much I had missed her and looked for her. She said, "I know. I missed you, too." And she went to sleep.

Scully***
That night I stayed in Mulder's room- Samantha was in mine. I woke up at about 5 and looked over to the area of floor where Mulder had been sleeping. He wasn't there. The adjoining door into Sam's room was open. I got out of bed and walked through the door. Mulder was sitting on the edge of Samantha's bed, watching her sleep. I couldn't see his face. Samantha looked like an angel. There was no way that you would ever guess that she had done the things she did. She looked like an average teenage girl. Her most have seen me standing in the doorway out of his peripheral vision or heard the floor creak under me or something, because he turned around and looked at me. He had that Charlie Brown kinda wishy-washy grin on his face. I walked up to him and put my arm around his shoulders. "She's finally home, Scully." He said quietly, not braking his gaze from Samantha. I asked him if she had told him what happened. He shook his head. "We'll find out tomorrow." Then there was a bright light.

Mulder***
This bright light flashed, filling the whole hotel room. Instinctively, I reached for Dana's hand. It wasn't there. Samantha wasn't there either. I remember thinking "No not again." It was like I was floating alone in a yellow room. I screamed for Scully. Seconds later everything was dark. I couldn't see my hands in front of my face. Then I heard Samantha's voice. "Fox? Fox what's going on?" I called for her and told her to follow my voice. She came up to me; she was cold and shaking. "Scully!" I called. I got no response. I called for her, and Sam shushed me. "Listen, Fox." I shut up and listened. There was a faint groaning sound coming from somewhere. I followed the sound and my hand brushed up against something. "Scully?" I whispered. "Mulder?" She replied. Samantha was on my heals. "Fox, where are we?" She kept asking me. I had no idea where we were. Then, the whole room was lit up with a bluish-purple light. I looked over to Scully. She had a gash on her head. She told me she must have hit it when she fell. The room we were in- it was odd. The ceiling was low, and the room seemed circular. I crawled to one of the walls. It felt like metal- it was freezing. Actually, the whole room was really cold. Then the ceiling started to rise, making this sound that sounded like a note on a xylophone. I exchanged a glance with Dana. She was keeping her cool- I was terrified. Samantha was shivering, so I hugged her tightly. Then something caught my eye. It was... I don't know. I can't remember to this day. It came to take Scully away.

Scully***
Then this thing came in to the room. It grabbed my arm, pulling me upwards. I tried to resist, but I couldn't move. I couldn't even talk. My head was turned around, and I mentally pleaded with Mulder to help me. He stood and started to come after the thing, but something must have happened because he collapsed. And they took me away. The next thing I remember I was floating. My eyes were shut. It was like I was in a bad dream where I knew I was dreaming and couldn't open my eyes. I tried to scream, but I couldn't even breathe. I started to panic, my mind so clouded I couldn't even think straight. Then I had this pain. Like menstrual cramps. Something was doing something to me and I couldn't see what it was, let alone resist. Then I felt myself bleeding. My other senses came back to me, too. I could feel the air against my skin- I was naked. I could feel the blood going down my legs. Then, there was a pain at both of my temples. Pinching. Sharp. I screamed. I was shocked when my mouth opened. I tried to open my eyes. I blinked and was back in the room.

Mulder***
They paralyzed me and took her. There was nothing I could do. I tried futily for several minutes to find a crack or an opening in the wall. I collapsed on me knees in despair. Samantha crawled over to me and hugged my shoulders. "It'll be okay, Fox." She whispered. I turned around and hugged her tightly. I wasn't going to let it (whatever it was) take her, too. I pulled away from her and asked her "Samantha, what happened to you?" She looked at me intently. There was a certain amount of distrust in her eyes, and with good reason. "They abducted me that night, Fox. They took me and examined me and gave me shots. I... I don't remember exactly what they did to me. But these men were there the whole time. Watching me, studying me. I think they took some of my blood and hair. And this one guy, he was a guy daddy knew, he told me not to be afraid. But I was, Fox, oh God, I was so afraid. They did things to me, and afterwards I couldn't remember. But it all hurt so bad. And then, one day, they shaved off all of my hair, and put me to sleep or something. I must have been asleep for a long time because when I woke up again, the guy daddy knew was old. Very old. "He told me that he was my dad and that I had been in a coma since I was born. I knew it wasn't true. But I played along. I just wanted to get out of there so bad. And he took me out and fixed me up. I lived in this place where I was all-alone all day. I knew that I had been asleep or whatever for a long time but I was still eight years old! I was so confused. "After I grew back all of my hair, the man took me out of the place. We got in this plane and he told me he was taking me to Washington to see my uncles. My "uncles" were the same men who tested me and watched me. The man and I stayed in his apartment. One night, when he was asleep, I escaped. "I went to New York on a train- I stole some money from him. And I... oh God Fox- for seven years I did that! Seven years I was a whore! A dirty whore! I knew Mom would be so disappointed in me. I could barely live with myself! I wanted to die so much, but Stephanie helped me. She gave me drugs and things felt better." It was at that moment, exactly, that I hated Stephanie. "I tried, kinda, to look for you and Mom and Dad. Sort of. I know it sounds horrible, but I couldn't stand to face Mom and Dad after I had become a prostitute! Then, one day, I saw him. He was in New York. I hid from him, but from then on I was totally paranoid that they were looking for me. So, I found Mom. And I called her. I was so scared. But I had to go home. I couldn't be a hooker forever. "Then the night when you came, this guy... he beat the shit outta me! He tried to get me to do it for free... when I declined he starting hitting me. I screamed and his neighbors came knocking. I escaped then. "I'm so glad that you found me. I don't know how much more I could take." Then Samantha lifted up her sleeve. There were bruises up and down her arm that I hadn't seen before. "I'm addicted to heroin, Fox." She said. Then, there was a bright flash, and Scully appeared in the middle of the room. I rushed over to her. She was dressed in all white- the material felt like polyester. She was curled up, rocking back and forth, rubbing her temples. "Dana?" I asked, putting a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and looked at me. Her pupils were so dilated I didn't think she had any iris at all. Her eyes were bloodshot and she was sobbing. I looked down. Her pants were bright red with blood. "What did they do to you?" I asked. "Oh, God, Mulder, it hurts!" She wailed, hurling herself in my arms. I think I began crying then. I tried to comfort her as best I could, but I knew I couldn't take her pain away. And then they came to take me.

Scully***
My eyes slowly adjusted to the light, and, with that, came the over-whelming pain in my temples. The pain was so great I began to cry. I sat up, shutting my eyes as tight as I could, massaging my temples as hard as I could. I felt Mulder's hand on my shoulder, and I turned around to face him. He looked at me worriedly, then his eyebrows raised when he saw all of the blood on my pants. The sharp pain was shooting into my temples, and I couldn't keep control any more. I wrapped my arms around him, and he held me equally as tight. I looked up behind him. That thing that took me was back. As if something had invaded my body, I jerked away from Mulder. I tried to tell him to look out, but no words would form. And then he was gone. I strained to move my body, but I couldn't until he was gone. I wailed in despair and threw myself in a corner of the room. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't bring myself together to even comfort the teenager who was also in the room; scared shitless. I stayed in that corner, trying to lessen my pain, just waiting for Mulder. Like a coward.