Date: Wed, 27 Mar 1996 18:03:45 -0500 (EST)
From: elclin0@pop.uky.edu (Eric Lee Cline)
Subject: Spaceballs: The Crossover Part 3
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Once upon a time warp...


"What are those things coming out of her nose?"
"Spaceballs?"
"Oh, shit.  There goes the planet."
        - Two Apemen


S P A C E B A L L S :  T H E  C R O S S O V E R


"I am the keeper of a greater magic.  A power known throughout the universe
as the..."
"The Force?"
"No!  Da Schwartz!"
                - Yogurt and Barf

The Schwartz

To use the Schwartz, you must be either on the Up Side or the Down Side.
Use the Force rules for this (with some modifications)

"There are two sides to every Schwartz."
        - Dark Helmet

Up Side
All Schwartz(Force) powers are as written.  Schwartz users of the Up Side
progress as a real Jedi would.

Down Side
All powers are one difficulty higher.

There are no advantages to the Down Side.
The Up Side is more powerful, but not necessarily good.

Each Schwartz, of course, has both sides.  What this means, is while Lone
Starr may have been Schwartz-sensitive to the Up Side, there will now be a
Down Sider somewhere for him besides Dark Helmet, because Dark Helmet was
the Down Side of Yougurt's Up Side.  This provides GMs with a good excuse
to make cheap bad guys.

Oddly enough, the Up Side is usually good, while the Down Side is usually evil.

A player wishing to become Schwartz-sensitive must tell his GM.  His GM
will roll a die in secret.  Even means the PC got the Up Side, odd means he
got the Down Side.  The other side may go to wherever the GM sees fit.

Schwartz Rings

"Not that!"
"Yes, that."
        -Asshole and Dark Helmet

With a ring, a Schwartz user may focus a blade of pure Schwartz or fire a
bolt of Schwartz.  Activating is an Easy Alter task, and gives no Dark Side
Points(if you choose to use them with the Schwartz).  The sword may be kept
"up" indefinitely, if wished, with no penalties, but will deactivate if the
PC is hit hard enough to knock the breath out of them, or 2D stun damage.

Schwartz Bolts: 5D damage, Ranges 2-10/20/50
Schwartz Swords: 5D damage, Moderate Difficulty

If two people fighting with Schwartz Swords roll exactly equal to hit and
block, the Schwartzes get twisted, and they must pull them apart(Moderate
Strength roll).

"I hate it when my Schwartz gets twisted"
        - Dark Helmet

Schwartz rings are also supposed to hold the Schwartz in them.  Many
Schwartz masters say this to their pupils, but it's not true.

"The Schwartz is in you Lone Starr, it's in you!"
        - Yogurt

Schwartz Powers

Block Schwartz Blade
Control Power
Difficulty: Moderate
This may be kept "up."
Effect: This is what allowed Dark Helmet to block the blade of Lone Starr's
Schwartz ring.  It projects a Schwartz energy field around the user to
block any and all Schwartz-based attacks, i.e. Schwartz Bolts and Swords.

Eric Lee Cline (elclin0@pop.uky.edu)

How about trying a handful of new mint-flavor Palpatines for that bad
breath?
Source: geocities.com/area51/shire/4788

( geocities.com/area51/shire) ( geocities.com/area51)