AS ALLIES


He stared discretely at her from across the mess hall. She sat alone, her long, fiery red mane draped around her face and tumbling down her shoulders. He could imagine that he saw her glowing, ice blue eyes from where he sat. They were two fiery orbs, hilighted by her red hair, set amidst her dark, hardened features. Her eyes were narrowed, like a snake’s, surveying the inhabitants of the mess hall coldly, as if she was detached from the rest of the busy inhabitants, a severed limb from the whole body. One of her small, wiry hands was stretched out on the table before her, the long, thin fingers rhythmically tapping one at a time upon the hard surface of the table. He watched her gaze journey across the mess hall, surveying the inhabitants, checking the exits, an instinctive habit she had to have picked up over her years as a public enemy.

He realized her eyes had latched onto his, her gaze penetrating his gaze. They sat locked there for a moment, challenging from opposite sides, and he felt his darkened soul reaching out and searing into her. But she was ice, and immune to anything he did. Not a flicker of emotion rose to her cold face, and then, with a contemptuous nod, she acknowledged him before her gaze difted elsewhere. Chakotay felt his face burn crimson. He knew what she did was all just a show, the feigned show of submission to his authority, the feigned loyalty and sturdiness. He knew this woman, had stalked her since they were both children, his hatred fed with each labored beat of his heart as he closed in on his prey. He knew what that stony surface covered up, he knew the evil that lurked behind that facade. Pure, uncorrupted evil. She dared not release it now, not while she was at his mercy. Chakotay thought with a bolt of pain flashing through his head. *Damn that Caretaker for this!*

He had been closing in on her. Soon he’d have her, he had promised himself, checking the sensor readings for the ion path her ship had left. Janeway had taken quite a chance using such a tiny, weak ship to conduct her most recent attack in. Though it was lithe and maneuverable, the shields were weak and the ship easily damaged. In addition, the ship’s weapons were feeble and ineffective.

His intelligence agents had been quick to inform him of her most recent attack, and Chakotay was soon on her tail, closer to her capture than he had been in the twenty one years since she escaped the Tarnoth Penal Colony, when her reign of terror arose. He almost spat at the memory of that fatal day, when he was twenty two, the news that Prisoner 007351, or Kathryn M. Janeway, had started up a riot and escaped from the maximum security prison. He had felt sick for days afterwards, had felt the awful sting of disgust in himself for allowing her to get free, after the cold blooded murder from years before. Then, gathering his wits about him, he had taken a memorable pilgrimage to his childhood home, on Kreivor Manor, where the calamity had taken place.

The memories were blurred, fuzzy from years of searching to try to uncover the full extent of them. To this day, he still couldn’t remember all the details. He remembered the flames, the bright talons licking their way up the wall, clawing over the spilled furniture and the writhing bodies. He still remembered the screams... Oh Gods, the screams... He saw his father’s face, staring up at him with dead eyes, trapped under the rubble across the room, choking even before the fire managed to consume him, struggling to free himself from the wreckage, calling for Chakotay to run, calling for Chakotay to help him, screaming. Chakotay, then eleven, stood there, watching, eyes wide with horror, as the world burned around him, as his father disappeared behind the wall of menacing flames. He vaguely remembered the strong arms of one of the colony’s soldiers reaching around him, grasping him, pulling him out of the reach of the golden talons, sweeping him swiftly through the mansion, suspended in midair, feet dangling above the ashy ground as they plunged through the smoky darkness until they reached the outside, the fresh, uncontaminated air.

He was nursed back to health by a number of Cardassian and Bajoran nurses. Just hours after the fire, the Cardassian gul his father had held lands for explained harshly to a semi-conscious Chakotay the fact that a young Terran girl had been responsible for his father’s death and the destruction of his estates, planting the bomb within the pack of supplies that was taken in by the estate twice daily.

“ An event such as this,” The gul spat, “ Occurs regularly. This is the perfect demonstration why Terran scum is worthless in this universe, no matter what good laborers they may make.” His smile, containing an indifferent sort of warmth, directed itself at Chakotay. “ Though, there are some exceptions. Your father was a great man, and with proper instruction, you could become one, too. I shall see to your schooling and training, and rest assured, you’ll become a great warrior in the Alliance.”

“ I don’t care about being a great warrior.” The reply tore angrily from his lips. “ All I want is to *kill* that girl who killed my father!”

“ Rest assured,” The gul had replied, “ She shall be punished severely for her actions. But you must realized, young Chakotay, that she couldn’t have been acting alone... not at her age. There must have been someone behind it.” He went on to explain how he suspected someone in the girl’s community might be responsible, but there was no way to sort them out from one another.

“ Why bother?” Chakotay had murmured. “ Kill them all! Sort out the bodies!” The gul chuckled and patted him on the head.

“ I believe you and I think on relatively the same wave length... At this very moment, a legion of my finest soldiers are destroying the village. I promise you, they’ll apprehend her as soon as she arrives home from her daily shifts. What happens to her after that is up to you.”

Chakotay had tuned the gul out as he spoke, thinking only of this little girl who had been responsible for his pain, for his father’s screams, for the loss of his wealth... When the decision fell upon him as to the fate of the girl, he took the gul’s advice and sent the girl to the prison facility-- a fate worse than any death she could receive. Instead of having a quick, instant death, she’d waste slowly away over the years, until she was broken both body and spirit-- then she’d die off. He turned it in his head just how she could have committed such an act alone, like he privately believed, despite the gul’s assurances to the otherwise. The question plagued him for the next eleven years, until the day came when he received word of her escape from the prison facility she had lived in for all the years since her apprehension. He had read over the casualty reports with a clenched jaw. Then it hit him. She was just plain evil. She was not a product of the darkness, she *was* the darkness, born into it, consumed by it, eaten alive by it. How else could one so young kill? This is more than just vengeance, he had realized as he prepared to begin his twenty year hunt for her, this was about the destruction of evil, of the antichrist itself. Every man has his devil, and Chakotay knew he had found his.

Meeting his expectations, Janeway went on to become the most notorious terrorist the Alliance had dealt with in a century, pillaging, rampaging, robbing, and murdering hundreds to thousands of people within her years. When the rebellion arose, she reluctantly joined their ranks, being lured out of one life of bloodshed to a life of a different kind of bloodshed. Instead of lawless, motiveless killing like she had engaged in beforehand, she was now fighting for the ‘Terran cause’. Chakotay had never bought into this rebellion of theirs. It was merely a bunch of disgruntled, worthless slaves who never contributed in any way to the welfare of the Alliance in the first place. As a mercenary employed and raised to serve the Cardassian/Klingon Alliance, Chakotay had a comfortable enough life already without the other fools in his race rising against what they considered tyranny. The fools. They needed to be kept as slaves. It was the best thing for people such as them.

His thoughts quickly drifted back to Janeway. He remembered just how tempted he had been to kill her when they were both stranded in the Delta Quadrant together, before the Kazon destroyed the array to prevent the ruthless Ocampa from getting their hands on it, preventing Chakotay and Janeway’s vessels from getting back to the Alpha Quadrant. He had been shocked at the fact that she sacrificed her own vessel to save his own. On the viewscreen, he saw her ship about to careen with the Kazon vessel. He ordered her immediate transport out of her vessel for only one reason-- he didn’t want her to die in an act of heroism. He wanted her to die shamefully, during one of her evil deeds like she deserved.

It had been with the greatest of reluctance that he had taken her on as his first officer. Unfortunately, he had no choice. He needed the Rebel crewmembers to fill in the places of the dead Alliance officers, and Janeway was the only way he could get control over the rebels. Even so, he had a hard time restraining himself. Each and every time she approached him, her cold eyes burning holes through him, his fingers itched to snatch his weapon out of his holster and kill her right there. The minute they got home-- then he could follow through and destroy her once and for all. But for now, he had to put up with her presence.

He had for almost a year now.
* * *


Clutching the report in her hands, Janeway approached the readyroom. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed some of her crew eyeing her nervously. Kathryn avoided the readyroom whenever possible. She didn’t need to be alone with that tyrant. She stopped abruptly and turned her head towards the nervous crewman. When she caught his gaze, he quickly averted his eyes with a blush. He had reason to be nervous for her, she mused. The entire crew knew about how Chakotay had hunted her for twenty years, for some dark, heinous crime in the past which none of them were quite clear about. Janeway turned back and took the final steps into the readyroom, her lips almost twitching with the irony of the fact that she was still haunted every moment of her life, even after thirty-two years, by one fatal mistake...

She heard him call for her to come in. Smoothly, Janeway glided through the threshold of the readyroom. Chakotay was facing away from her, bent over something he was working on, only the back of his dark head facing her. He expected her to wait until he finished whatever he was working on. Impatiently, Kathryn shifted her weight. She wasn’t one of those lower ranking officers he could push around as he pleased. Janeway paced strongly over so she was in his line of sight. When he must have realized it was her in the readyroom with him, he glowered up at her darkly.

“ What can I do for you, *Commander?*” he demanded. Undaunted, Janeway set the report down on his desk.

“ The personelle report for you, Captain.” She didn’t trouble herself with using the same tone back at him that he used at her. Janeway recognized what he was trying to do to her-- to break through her walls. It was almost amusing, she realized, a smirk pricking at her lips. He thought-- even after everything that had happened to her at his hands-- that he could bother her with this merciless persecution. He knew nothing. Absolutely nothing.

“ Take a seat,” he said. He eyed her cautiously, with an unwavering gaze, as she slowly sank down in the seat across from him. He felt her cold eyes on him as he read over the report. He wondered just what she thought as she stared at him like this, her knives piercing into him. Did she still remember the day she killed his father? Or was that just one death out of thousands, one that she’d forgotten in the pool of all the blood staining her soul?

“ This report is indecipherable,” he remarked. “ It’s like reading the grammatical context of a three-year old--”

She smiled dryly at him, eyes cold, face dead. “ I’m afraid, *Captain*, in the Tarnoth Penal Colony, I didn’t have much time to learn English grammar, so before you berate me for that, remember that *you* are the one who ordered the prelate to keep me imprisoned there, and as a result, I just can’t seem to formulate reports to your grammatical liking. You should have thought of that consequence before you made them convict me to a life sentence.” After the words left her lips, Kathryn wondered just why she had broached the forbidden subject. She shrugged it off and braced for the oncoming reaction.

He sprang to his feet, anger sprouting in him at the mention of their evil connection. “ *You* should have thought of the consequence of life imprisonment when you killed my father!” He spat.

“ But I was having so much fun as I was doing it.” She replied, a smirk tugging at her mouth.

Chakotay almost punched her, almost wrapped his hand around her tiny throat and let her die, slowly, painfully, for that remark. He saw the smirk tugging at her lips, and he realized just how amusing she was finding this. She didn’t take any of it seriously, and getting a rise out of him was her only intention. He clenched his fists, feeling his body shaking and seething with rage, but holding it back as he glowered down at her.

“ Just remember,” His voice shook-- he couldn’t stop it. “ Just remember that during those eleven years, as a result of your actions, you were tortured, raped, and worked to a skeleton at Tarnoth, while *I* was living in a palace on Cardassia.”

She still gazed up at him, still in a relaxed, comfortable position, her fierce eyes glowing, her hair spilling down her back. He couldn’t tell whether or not the last remark had fazed her, pierced some hemorrhage underneath the thick layers of defense she had under the surface. Coolly, icily, she rose in her chair until she was as close to eye level as she could be at her height.

“ And just remember,” She hissed, “ That while your father was screaming in agony as his life burned away, I was dining in a local cafe.”

Her reference to his father’s murder pushed him over the edge-- as she intended to do. He felt his arm swing back, his vision honed in on her left cheekbone. She saw it coming. She didn’t flinch, the light of self-satisfied triumph flashing in her gleaming eyes as she held her ground in front of him, not attempting to duck out of the way of his oncoming blow.

“ Seska to Chakotay,” His fist froze mid air. Janeway’s gaze broke off from his, as she glanced at his combadge.

“ Chakotay here,” he barked, turning away from Janeway, clenching his fists as the muscles beneath his face contracted.

“ We’re detecting some sort of spacial anomaly off the port bow. Please come to the bridge.”

“ I’ll be there in a moment,” he replied, with a glance out of the corner of his eye at his first officer, now standing with her arms crossed stubbornly across her chest, feet planted on the ground shoulder width apart. The scrape was over. She was safe from him momentarily, not that she felt she was in any danger in the first place. Chakotay wondered, in some dark part of his mind, if he would have been able to stop with just one blow. Once he had started to release his years of rage upon her, would he be able to stop there? “ Chakotay out.” He nodded his head towards the door, and Janeway stealthily, like a tiger, walked over to the door, her every muscle coordinated and smooth as she made her way over.

He stepped out onto the bridge fast onto her heels. A few of the crewmembers looked up, wondering just what kind of talk they’d had in the ready room. None bothered to look at Janeway for some hint. She looked the same in any situation, nothing fazed her cool exterior. Instead, they glanced at Chakotay. From the slight flush on his cheeks and the slightly hastened mannered in which he spoke, they knew there had been some sort of spat. Paris, the helmsman, one of Janeway’s old crew, turned his descreet gaze back to the viewscreen. He would give *anything* to know just what they had said in there, and to know just what dark secret existed between them.

He glanced once more at Janeway as Chakotay ordered for scans. She was leaning slightly forward in her seat, an odd spark in her eyes. Her features weren’t so hard and unyielding now that she gazed at the viewscreen, enraptured. She seemed to have some odd fascination with spacial anomalies, he’d noticed, even before they ended up on the Alliance vessel, Voyager. The name really had a double meaning. It was called Voyager, similar to the human word, but Voyager was also in one of the Cardassian dialects the word for ‘vengeance’. Knowing that Chakotay chose the name, Tom privately believed it mean the latter. He realized his mind was drifting, and he refocused on Janeway. Her eyes were narrowed, studying the swirling, bright mass on the viewscreen.

“... I recommend a shuttle be taken out for further scans,” Tuvok was saying. Chakotay listened to this analysis carefully, unsure whether or not he should follow Tuvok’s suggestion. He had come to trust Janeway’s crew a bit more recently, but he always took his own crew’s word over Janeway’s crews. He glanced at Rollins, the man immediately ahead of Tuvok in the chain of command, for confirmation that what Tuvok was saying was correct, that they needed further analysis of the anomaly to make sure it wouldn’t be a threat while they were in this region of space. Rollins gave an almost imperceptible nod.

“ All right then. Tuvok, you can go on that shuttle... and we’ll need a copilot.”

“ I’ll go,” Janeway volunteered from behind him. He turned, somewhat surprised. She was looking at him now, instead of at the viewscreen. He read in her face some sort of new light of... was it interest? It almost intrigued him to the point of letting her go, but then his familiar malice kicked in. Why let this woman indulge in anything?

“ Actually, Commander, I was planning on accompanying him,” Chakotay replied. Her face grew completely impassive as she settled back in the chair. They both knew what had just passed, even if the rest of the bridge was unaware of it. Chakotay had decided to go out of the mere intention of not letting her go and explore something that she might enjoy...

But he began to rethink his logic as he and Tuvok left the ship in the shuttle. He was leaving Voyager in Janeway’s hands. While he didn’t doubt she’d take care of the ship, he wasn’t sure what trouble she’d cause while she had it to herself. Janeway had enough support from the crew, probably more sway over the general populace than he himself did... There was the danger of a Rebel mutiny when he was on the ship, and it was only escalated when he was off of the ship...

However, he had been off the ship before, and she had never tried anything before. But still, he never could know... And with Tuvok right here next to him; he could easily kill Chakotay if he caught him off guard.

“ Sir,” Tuvok spoke, “ I’m detecting a wave of thoranic particles from the anomaly.”

“ Thoranic particles? Those can be used to line the replicator filters, couldn’t they?” Chakotay inquired.

“ They have been in the past,” Tuvok replied, remembering B’Elanna Torres, the assistant chief engineer, the half-breed’s report about how the replicator filters were being worn out with overuse.

“ Let’s beam aboard a sample and check them out,” Chakotay said.

Tuvok’s face lit with what could be considered alarm. “ Captain, we have insufficient data regarding this anomaly to ascertain the risks involved--”

“ Beam aboard a sample,” Chakotay ordered, cutting him off, preparing a container for the particles to be beamed into. He was getting a sick feeling in his stomach and a weight on his chest as time passed and dread over Janeway being in command on his ship without him there.

Reluctantly, Tuvok keyed in the commands. Chakotay set the container down on the transporter pad and stood back, the blue light of the shuttle’s transporter bathing his face as the gaseous matter shimmered into existence.

Chakotay pulled out his tricorder and took in a quick, first glance analysis. There was some strange substance mixed in with the particles. He reported this to Tuvok. “ We’d better do some more scans--”

He never finished the sentence. Suddenly, the gas within the container flickered, then the container exploded. Tuvok ducked down to avoid the impact, diving behind his seat. As quickly as the chaos began, it ended. Tuvok crawled over to Chakotay, lying immobile and bleeding on the floor.

“ Captain,” There was no response. Quickly, he ordered the computer to autopilot the shuttle back to Voyager and emit a distress call. Tuvok ran the tricorder over Chakotay. He was alive, but badly injured, skin singed by the gas from the sample container.

* * *


“ Chakotay,” The quiet whisper breathed into his ear. A soft, gentle voice and tone, spoken in a warm, soothing way that he hadn’t heard in a long time. There was a soft hand stroking his forehead, smoothing his hair back from his forehead. “ Chakotay,” The voice was louder, firmer now, with a note of authority that compelled him to push his reluctant, heavy eyelids open.

Soft, blue eyes gazed down into his, a smile lighting her lips as she realized he was conscious. “ It’s good to have you back, Commander.”

Chakotay felt his insides grow cold. He didn’t know what shocked him more-- the fact that it was Janeway ministering to him, or the fact that he was called Commander. He jerked back, out of her grasp. He stared, stunned at her. Her appearance had mutated since he last saw her. Her face was brighter, cheeks with a pink flush to them, her eyes softer, without the usual fierce gleam, her hair was shorter, a calm, reddish brown color instead of the fiery red, and somehow softer. Her expression told a lot, her features sympathetic and kind, reminding him of honey instead of steel.

“ What’s going on?” He demanded.

Her eyes flickered, confused at his tone for a moment, but then she attributed it to his disorientation. “ You were injured right after you collected the Thoranic particles. Commander Tuvok managed to get you back here. Your injuries were heavy, but the doctor managed to repair them. Though,” She admitted with a warm smile, “ You gave us quite a scare for a few minutes.”

*Commander* Tuvok? Why was she acting like this? Why was she dressed like she was? Something was wrong here. Was this an alien impostor?

*I need to play along until I know what’s going on,* he reasoned. He gave her a shadow of a smile. “ I see.”

“ Perhaps you’d like to rest awhile more, Commander,” she observed. *‘Commander’ again,* he noticed.

“ I think I’d like to. I’ll go back to my quarters and rest there, if no one has any objection,” He said, holding his breath. If Janeway thought he was Commander of this-- this ship, then he undoubtedly had quarters somewhere.

“ Of course. Do you want me to walk you there?” She asked.

“ No!” He bit in quickly. Softer, then, “I can manage.”

She nodded quietly, staring at him out of concerned eyes. It amazed him just how expressive her face was compared to how it usually looked. “ You’re sure you’re all right?” He could hear a note of inquiry, suspicion in her voice. It wasn’t hostile suspicion, just a curious sort of wondering.

“ Just fine,” he replied hastily. “ Excuse me.” Chakotay brushed past her towards the door of the sickbay.

“ Captain! May I speak with you a moment?” A man’s dry voice called. Chakotay turned, expecting the man to be addressing him. He was stunned when Janeway replied, “Of course, doctor.”

She followed the doctor into his office. Chakotay felt his jaw drop open. He recognized the hologram. He was Zimmerman’s creation, used on Alliance vessels to help subdue enemies when they commandeered the vessel, programmed to be ruthless and cruel. Now... he was a doctor?

Chakotay hurried out of sickbay, his stomach queasy. What had happened while he was gone?



Chakotay opened his eyes, his vision still swirling queasily around him. His body was weak and exhausted, and it was with the greatest effort that he managed to push his leaden body up by his elbows. He glanced around the darkened sickbay, curious as to why nobody was here when he awoke. He closed his eyes momentarily against his headache, recalling being in the shuttle with Tuvok, collecting the sample of Thoranic matter... His memory faded out there. Chakotay assumed he must have been injured and lost consciousness at this point in his blanked out recollection.

“ Doctor?” He called, noting how dry and hoarse his voice sounded. There was no answer. “ Computer, activate emergency medical hologram.”

“ That program is not recognized,” Came the computer’s monotonous reply. Chakotay’s brow furrowed, and with a moan, he sat all the way up. He reached for his combadge, but his hand froze in midair. He was wearing entirely different clothes. It wasn’t his starfleet uniform, it wasn’t the medical garb-- it was civillian clothing. Odd, he thought. I need to contact someone. They can explain everything.

He got up and dropped onto the floor next to the biobed. Chakotay lumbered over to the nearest comn panel, his bones and muscles still sore from his injuries.

Tapping it, he called, “Chakotay to Janeway.”

There was a pause for a beat, then her sharp voice, with a slight edge to it, came over the comn line. “ What is it?” She snapped, her voice like a whiplash.

“ Sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if I could see you down in sickbay for a moment, if you’re not busy,” Chakotay said.

There was an uncertain pause, which was enough to prompt Chakotay’s curiosity. “ I’ll be down in a few minutes. Janeway out.” Her voice was monotonous, not uncertain, but not filled with the usual prompt note of affirmation.

*I’ll know what’s going on in a few minutes,* he assured himself, settling back on the biobed.

* * *


Janeway walked down the corridor towards sickbay. Her steps were slowed by the doubt and uncertainty that plagued her. What could he possibly want with her now? He never summoned her to his presence unless to meet about ship’s business or berate her for sloppiness on one of her reports.

His tone... it had sounded so different over the comline. Less brooding, not harsh as if he would rather be cutting her throat instead of talking to her. Something was wrong here. She set herself on edge as she approached sickbay, careful not to let this strange, rare feeling of uncertainty show as the doors slid open.

“ Captain?” He called. Janeway halted abruptly, her brow furrowed. She took another cautious step forward out of the shadows so he could see her face. He caught her gaze, his face sincere, his features soft. “ Captain, sorry to bother you.”

‘Sorry to bother you.’ He had said that over the comn line, too. She had thought it curious then, but now she knew something was seriously wrong. Plus, he called her ‘Captain.’

“ Excuse me? Did I hear you right, sir?” Janeway queried, taking a cautious step closer to him, courteous merely out of her wariness. Normally, she *never* addressed him as ‘sir’... but it had been so long since she’d felt uncertain or insecure about any situation. Most things never had any effect on her. It was shocking just how much of an effect this was having on her now.

“ What?” Chakotay was confused. Did she just call him ‘sir?’

“ I thought I heard you call me-- well, nevermind. What is it?” *Get down to business,* she reasoned.

“ Well,” Chakotay paused. “ I was just wondering... why isn’t anybody here in sickbay? I expected you, or the doctor, and when I tried to activate the emergency medical hologram, the computer had no idea what the program was not recognized.”

What the hell is he talking about? Janeway wondered. She slowly said, “ I’m sorry, Captain, but I thought you preferred me not to be present when you woke in sickbay... and somebody has to run the bridge...”

Did she just call me Captain? He wondered. He studied her, suddenly noticing how drastically she had changed in a appearance. She, too, was out of uniform. Her hair was long again, and not tied up in a tight bun or ponytail but left to spill loosely down her back. The locks were redder, and her eyes were a cold, icy blue. Her features were hard, her blood red mouth set in a grim line, her cheeks and face pale, with dark shadows brooding about her eyes. In fact, she looked almost dead, the only part of her face alive were the fierce eyes, eyes that projected an intensity that overwhelmed him. What was it he saw in them? Coldness, a hard fierceness that he had never seen from her before-- never seen from anyone.

That spacial anomaly, he realized. Could this be a parallel universe?

“ Commander,” He began, purely guessing. She had called him Captain, and it seemed that she had some authority on this ship, so he speculated that she was the first officer, “ You did nothing wrong. I--I was just disconcerted.” (She nodded her head coolly at this statement.) “What exactly happened to me?”

“ You and Tuvok were collecting samples of Thoranic particles,” (He noticed, with curiosity, her use of the word ‘particles’. Being the scientist she was, he had expected her to use the correct term, ‘matter’.) “ You were injured. Tuvok brought you back to the ship with extensive injuries. Doctor Fitzgerald saved your life.”

“ Ah, Doctor Fitzgerald. Why isn’t he here now?” Chakotay queried.

“ He’s off duty,” Janeway replied. “ You don’t expect him to stay here during his free time, do you?”

“ No,” Chakotay hastily replied. “ I just thought that someone would normally be on duty in sickbay...”

“ That would be difficult considering that Fitzgerald is the only doctor onboard,” Janeway replied coldly, a frown pulling at her lips. Then, taking another step forward, she boldly spoke, “Did your... injury... somehow affect your memory, Captain? You don’t seem to be yourself.”

He let out a breath. “ I *am* a little disoriented... and some things are a bit fuzzy, but I think I’ll be fine.”

Janeway waited impatiently. *Why* did he call her down here? The question still echoed through her mind, no clearer now than it had been before. “ If you want me to get Doctor Fitzgerald down here to check your injury out again--”

“ I’ll be fine,” Chakotay cut in. The last thing he needed was their doctor to scan him and pronounce him just fine... that would arouse suspicion. “ I think I just need to rest. I’ll go to my quarters... and I suppose the ship is yours tomorrow.”

Janeway watched him through narrowed eyes. She was still expressionless, emotionless, despite the suspicions raging through her. She didn’t speak a word, but she nodded slowly and supplied, “ Rest is always good.”

Chakotay couldn’t tell whether or not she had suspicions by looking at her. With his Janeway, he always knew what she was feeling. This one was different. She had a thousand walls built up around the fragile core. But knowing the Janeway from his universe-- she was sharp. He knew this one had probably already deduced that something was amiss, whether or not she’d let him catch on to it.

“ All right. I’ll see you tomorrow,” Chakotay said, with a nod to Janeway. She didn’t move as he left sickbay, but he felt her eyes following him. Those eyes-- the fierce, blazing eyes.

* * *


Captain Chakotay read over ‘Captain’ Janeway’s profile once again.

He had figured it out. He was in a parallel universe, a universe with an alternate history. In this universe, there was an organization called the United Federation of Planets, consisting of Terrans, Vulcans, and hundreds of other species. The Bajorans and the Cardassians were deadly rivals, the Klingons were allies with the Terrans and enemies of the Cardassians. This Chakotay had been a Maquis rebel, a Terran whose home had been taken away from the Cardassian who had joined the Maquis to fight the Cardassians. His vessel had disappeared in the badlands. The revered Captain Janeway was sent after him. hey were both pulled into the Delta Quadrant, Janeway destroyed the array to keep it out of the ruthless *Kazon* hands, and they joined into one crew onboard Voyager.

So similar, yet so different. He thought, keying to scroll down in this Janeway’s profile. Hardly the same ruthless terrorist as his Janeway was. Made the second youngest Captain in Federation history, at the age of thirty, had won several metals for valor and excellence in duty.

Chakotay pushed the console away. One Janeway was no different from another. They were probably both just as ruthless as each other, only expressed in a different form. He had concluded a long time ago that his Janeway was just plain evil, born that way. This Janeway must have been born that way as well, whether or not she openly expressed it.

And yet, when he read this Chakotay’s logs, he realized his double had a positive outlook on Janeway. Almost... a loving one. Chakotay quickly pushed the thought aside with disgust. Needless to say, he knew enough now about who this Chakotay was-- a highly spiritual, very loyal man-- to play the part until he got the opportunity to get back to his ship. Only God knew what hell Janeway was raising back on his ship with his weak double present instead of himself.

His thoughts were interrupted by a chime at the door. He glanced up, called, “Enter!”, and quickly shut off the console with Janeway’s profile.

The slender woman paused in the light of the entrance way, then stepped fully in, letting the door hiss shut behind her.

He stared at her darkened form. She stood for a few seconds, watching him, then spoke quietly, “ You never told me you could see in the dark, Chakotay.”

“ Computer, full lights,” he barked. The room lit up, and he had to squint to keep his eyes from being overwhelmed by the full flood of the light. “ What can I do for you, Captain?” He asked, almost stumbling over the word ‘Captain’, so unfamiliar coming from his own lips.

“ I just wanted to check and see how you were doing,” she replied, sitting down in a nearby chair uninvited. “ You seemed out of sorts in sickbay yesterday, to say the least.” Her blue eyes narrowed as they plunged into his, searching him with a gaze that seemed to reach to his very soul. She has beautiful eyes, he noticed for the first time. Even his Janeway had beautiful eyes, even if he never could tell. He usually was overwhelmed by the intensity of them-- he had never quite looked at them. They were the only part about Janeway that aroused any feeling other than hatred in him. His contempt and hatred for her usually overwhelmed everything else he might feel towards her. But those eyes-- they haunted him. Part of the reason was that they showed him that there was something beneath the cool surface other than just her evil-- something that scared the hell out of him-- an intensity of emotions and passion churning, and pain-- pain that he knew he had been the main factor in causing. Chakotay broke out of his musings. Where had that come from? He had never quite taken the time to look beneath his hatred for her, beneath her coldness towards him, to contemplate what Janeway could possibly feel, whether or not she knew she felt anything. Something about this new Janeway unraveled his web of hatred... Even though this was only the second time he had spoken to her.

“ I’m fine,” he replied smoothly, not sure what all to say to her. He tried to speak to her as if she was someone completely different than Kathryn Janeway. In a way, she really was. She was bright, happy, alive, vulnerable. His Janeway was hardened with a dead soul and a heart of darkness.

But if his Janeway was born evil, this one must have been as well.

“ We did an analysis of the Thoranic matter. Unfortunately, B’Elanna concluded that it wouldn’t be suitable for lining the replicator filters-- too much of it had been despoiled by the chrymocyroctic particles produced by the anomaly.”

*I don’t understand a word of what she’s saying,* Chakotay thought. He had never been too learned in science. Not sure what to say, he spoke, “It’s a pity. I know Torres really needed something for the replicators. She’ll have to recalibrate all of the replicators herself now.” He thanked the spirits that he remembered reading B’Elanna Torres, the half-breed, was chief engineer onboard this ship.

“ Well,” Janeway said, a smile quirking at the corners of her lips. “ B’Elanna will have a field day with the repairs. She’s actually been complaining for once of having too *little* to do.”

“ Well,” He spoke slowly, “ I think we can rest assured that we’ll run into some Hirogen, Borg, or another damned spacial anomaly that will remedy that problem quickly.”

Janeway grinned full out now. It lit up her face with a warm light, her eyes glowing with merriment. She *was* a beautiful woman... “ With our luck, that wouldn’t be too unlikely. But, quite frankly, I’d deal with hostile Hirogen or Borg any day before a grouchy B’Elanna Torres.” He chuckled with her. It was friendly laughter, his hatred for this Janeway melting. He had to remind himself repeatedly to remember who he was talking to to keep from giving in to a reluctant liking for this woman.

Janeway seemed to be waiting for him to say something more. When he didn’t, she abruptly slapped her knees with the palms of her hands and stood up. “ Well, I guess that takes care of that. I’d better be heading back to the bridge if there’s nothing more. Oh, and Chakotay,” he glanced up. “ Would you care to join me for dinner tonight?”

He couldn’t help grinning, forgetting for a moment that this was Janeway and he was in a parallel universe. “Ah, the ulterior motive.”

With a smile and a fake blush of shame, the other Janeway let her head hang slightly. “ I have to admit that was one of my reasons for coming here.”

“ What time?” He asked. *I shouldn’t be doing this,* he told himself, *I should be looking for a way back to my ship. Besides, you know who you’re talking to!*

“ Holodeck three, at 2000 hours. I’ll expect you to be prompt, Commander,” She said as she turned towards the door.

“ I’ll be there,” Chakotay promised her as she slid out of the door.

He sat, staring at the closed door during the few minutes after her departure, contemplating why he had just agreed to dinner, wondering what exactly had prompted his brief loss of control.

He shook off the strange numbness of confusion that was descending upon him. He’d contemplate this all later. For now, he’d simply try to figure out what he’d do from here until he could figure out how to get home, and whether or not he should tell this crew about the fact that he was from a parallel universe.

Instead, he ended up unable to concentrate on the task at hand, staring at the chronometer, waiting for 2000 hours, one question stuck in his mind:

Why was she having this much effect upon him?

* * *


It had been a few days. Commander Chakotay had adjusted to the routine aboard this strange Voyager, playing his part carefully, constructing this other ‘Captain’ Chakotay’s persona from the entries he had read in his personal logs. From what information he had gathered about this other crew, he figured it would be safer for him to refrain from revealing his identity. The crew was vastly different from before.

Seska was alive, his third in command. She was a full blooded Cardassian who didn’t bother to hide her identity. Tuvok was a Vulcan rebel, B’Elanna Torres was (in the other Chakotay’s logs) a half-breed rejected by both the Alliance crew and the Rebel crew, but she worked for the Alliance. Tom Paris was a pilot, part time alcoholic, and one of Janeway’s crew. Harry Kim was a scar-faced, hardened rebel fighter. Seven of Nine was Anika in this universe, without borg implants, the other Paris’s girlfriend and a former call girl. Neelix and Kes had never joined the crew. The doctor was no doctor, but a killer hologram designed to help defend the ship against invaders. Chakotay was working for the Alliance, one of its mercenaries. Janeway, last of all, was one of the rebel leaders and a notorious terrorist responsible for killing hundreds of people.

He didn’t see her very often in this universe. She sat in the chair next to him on the bridge, but all attempts to start a conversation on his part were deflected, received with a suspicious glare on her part, and monosyllable responses. He reasoned that this Janeway and this Chakotay must have some ill humor between them. From reading some of this Chakotay’s log entries, he noticed that she as referred to as ‘The cold blooded-bitch’ or ‘Evil, conniving murderer’... He also noticed that this Chakotay repeatedly referred to twenty years during which he relentlessly chased her throughout the galaxy, but there was never a motive mentioned.

Now, he read over a few stray padds of information he had found on this ship’s computer about parallel universes, containing far more information than the other Chakotay was finding on Voyager. This universe, he reasoned, had been so drastically altered by crossovers that it was only natural that they’d have extensive research conducted on them.

Janeway was currently on the surface of Umari Prime, a planet his Voyager had visited before looking at the spacial anomaly. She was collecting the materials for which the other Chakotay had agreed to exchange dilithium. Chakotay personally thought this other captain was insane for trading dilithium. It was a substance that was very difficult to come by. In his universe, it was Voyager that usually received dilithium from other ships.

He heard a beeping on a console behind him. Chakotay stood up and turned on instinct, about to call Tuvok for a report, shocked to see Rollins at the station. “ Rollins, report,” He called, trying to shake off the momentary shock at the unfamiliarity of seeing someone other than Tuvok at Tuvok’s station.

“ I’m detecting phaser fire near the away team’s location--” He began.

“ Seska to Voyager,” Chakotay’s combadge abruptly came alive. “Requesting emergency beam out for myself and the team members immediately next to me.”

Chakotay nodded for the beamout to be authorized. “Who’ve we got?” He demanded after an interval of still silence during which the beam out occurred.

“ Lieutenant Seska, Ensign Kraal, and Lieutenant Paris have been beamed up,” Rollins reported.

“Patch me through to the transporter room,” Chakotay ordered him. Rollins’s fingers danced swiftly over the console. “Seska, where’s Janeway?” He demanded.

“ The Umarians tried to cheat us out of our foodstuffs. Janeway refused to leave until she got them. She ordered the rest of us to beam out. The insolent bitch--”

“ Enough,” Chakotay cut her off, tapping his combadge to close it. He glanced around the bridge briefly. “ Tuvok, Rollins, and uh--” He paused glancing at a young Cardassian, “ You, come with me. We’re beaming down there.”

“ Sir..?” Tuvok was confused. What was he doing? Beaming down to get Janeway?

“ Do you have a problem, Lieutenant?” Chakotay demanded, steel in his voice and eyes as they shuffled into the turbolift.

“ Not at all, Captain,” Tuvok replied stiffly as the turbolift zoomed down to the transporter deck. “ I simply find it curious that you are concerned about the Commander’s safety now after observing how the two of you... interact.”

“ I would do this for any of my crew, the commander included,” Chakotay replied shortly. Feeling the puzzled glances of all in the turbolift, Chakotay realized just how out of character he was acting for the other Chakotay. He stared at the turbolift doors, jaw clenched firmly. It was probably best to remain silent for the next few minutes before he made more mistakes than he already had. But Chakotay refused to allow anything to happen to Kathryn, his protective instinct towards her extending even into a parallel universe with a completely different Janeway.

Part II

Return to my Homepage