MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
Between two hunks of bread.
Mary had a little lamb.
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's tail
and turned it's wool to nylon
THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL
Who had a little curl
right in the middle of her forehead...
And when she was good, she was very very good
But when she was bad she got a fur coat, jewels, a sports car......
HUMPTY DUMPTY
sat on a wall
Humpty dumpty had a great fall
All the kings horses and all the kings men
Had scrambled eggs on toast for breakfast
HICKORY DICKORY DOCK
Three mice ran up the clock
The clock struck one;
the others got away with minor injuries
GEORGIE PORGY
Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
LITTLE MISS MUFFET sat on a tuffet,
her clothes all tattered and torn.
It wasn't the spider that crept up beside her,
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.
SIMPLE SIMON met a Pieman,
Going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman,
What have you got there?
Said the Pieman unto Simon,
Pies, you twit!
JACK AND JILL
Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Jill, that dill
Forgot her pill
And now they have a son.
There once was a barmaid named Gale
On whose breasts was the menu for ale
But since she was kind
For the sake of the blind
On her ass it was printed in Braille