Enjoy!
Who says all robots are humanoid? Certainly not this playful felonious pooch! Sure sure sure, he pretends everything is okay so you're still thinking "Ah, Bumpus, man's best friend!" But all the while he's secretly in the van of a new dawn for this world and many others! Sure he's humping your leg but, be honest, wouldn't you?
Weather's beautiful! Love the locals! Enjoying your respite from the workaday world? Well this timely and provocative piece will remind your puny human brain-pan that quite frankly Johnny Foreigner wants you dead, bastard :) So whether you're livin' it up loafin' in Cancun or mixing up some wicked domestic colonialism at Lake Meade or Four Corners you are advised to remember never to leave home unless directed to do so by a robot or pursued by a cop!
Only robots and the occasional mandroid have perfected the art of earth travel! You puny humans know we are your masters when you see us drifting above you in our silent airships! See yourselves drool in admiration of our quiet grace! All right, I admit it, there were some fatalities. And, sadly, our mighty skycraft were popular with Nazis. But don't blame the machine for that! Do you blame the gun when Elvis shoots a tv? No, you blame the children (who, by the way, are responsible for 90% of divorces). *sigh*, I wish I were a zeppelin pilot.
A comfort and succor to many earthlings is mortality. Relieved of the noxious burthen of afterlives humans are uniquely qualified to live life to its fullest and truly reorder a paradise on earth, unless they are near krauts. These oddly rhyming folk are sequel-happy and it wasn't such a good show the first time, like weekend at bernie's;) Getting caught in the vicinity of a sausage-mad square-head will make your life seem eternal, soon you will pray for death. And if old Fritzie has his way you'll likely have it!
For robots personal cleanliness is not just a hobby or a government propaganda exercise like it is for you people. No, for us being clean is an integral part of a powerful physical fitness regimen that includes indolence and sloth. Our sinews are stronger than your mightiest strongmen with or without practice. In fact too much exertion could cause some kind of malfunxion. Better just to stay in then. Ever-vigilant hygiene keeps out the rust-n-dust and dirt-n-grime and keeps us humming along smoothly towards galactic domination! I believe the man in this picture is your king?
This perky crew knows how far it is to Tipperary...and Babylon! There's nothing like a little momento mori with your morning joe! For you humans death will eventually be as a tall glass of lemonade on an unreasonably warm day in July. So cheer up! All this trouble, but man o man, what a great glass o' juice awaits! Mmmm, that's smooth sippin' oblivion!
Links to other sites on the Web
NEW!!! See pix of the 'bots and their pals!
Planning a party? Maybe these guys can help!
What sort of Hors d'ouevrs were you thinking about? maybe you want to reconsider.
Live it up fast, before this prophecy is past.
Armageddon don't come cheap. How can we afford it?
Don't believe in Santa Claus? You will!
I wonder what's going down in Hollywood right now.
Catya Sassoon!
We are not the first!
Important!
On the trail of a madman.
A quick dip!
Art lovers satisfied since 9 July 1999
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