"If you like I'll make that donkey laugh for you. That should make an interesting picture, senor."
"You mean you can do that?"
"No problemo." And sure enough after whispering something in the donkey's ear, the animal was hew-hawing and stomping all four of his feet.
"Thanks for the opportunity of a great picture," said the happy tourist.
"That's nothing senor. Maybe you like take ee-nother. Yah, right now… You see I think I can make him cry also. That got to be worth few more peso's, right?" That was also true. With a grand swish of cloth, the Mexican flipped open his poncho and the surprised donkey began sobbing and actually shed copious tears.
"How did you do that. Share such a secret and I'll give you a very nice tip for your trouble," stated the American tourist.
"Well, senor, when I whispered the first time in his ear, I merely said that my sexual tool was bigger than his. The thought of such a thing gave him a laughing fit. Then all I had to do to make him cry was to show him the proof!"
Then the whining began. "I don't want to go to school, ma ma, I don't wanna go to school. They hate me. Everyone… Everyone there hates me. The teachers think I'm stupid. I understand nothing when they talk to me. The children curse me and spit on me. I don't have any friends there."
"But David, sweetie, you must go to school. You're the principal."
Resolving to surprise her husband, the executive's wife stopped by his office and found his secretary sitting on his lap. Without hesitation he dictated, "…and in conclusion, gentlemen, shortage or no shortage, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
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