Music and jokes do go together.

A man takes the day off work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Ribbit 9 Iron."

The man looks around and doesn't see anyone.

"Ribbit. 9 Iron."

Now the fellow is a bit annoyed. He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts his other club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! he hits it 10 inches from the cup. He is shocked. He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog, eh?"

The frog reply's "Ribbit. Lucky frog."

The man decides to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?" the man asks.

"Ribbit. Three wood."

The guy takes out his three wood and boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "OK where to next?"

The frog replies, "Ribbit. Las Vegas."

They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "OK frog, now what?"

The frog says, "Ribbit. Roulette."

Upon approaching the roulette table, the man asks, "What do you think I should bet?"

The frog replies, "Ribbit. $3000, black six."

Now, this is a million-to-one shot to win, but after the golf game, the man figures what the heck. Boom! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table. The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You've won me all this money and I am forever grateful."

The frog replies, "Ribbit, Kiss Me."

He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him he deserves it. With a kiss, the frog turns into a gorgeous 15-year-old girl.

"And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room."

*****
It happened one night in a deserted parking area high above the Hollywood sign. A young boy seeking privacy from other lovers in parked cars suggested to his girl that they crawl under their vehicle and make love. After locking his girl-friend in a passionate embrace the two were bathed in a bright light, and a voice sounding rather authoritative, announced: "What do you think you're doing there on the ground!"

Without looking up into the blinding light of the flashlight, the young man answered, "My muffler was dragging and we are wiring it in place."

"Likely story," announced the man in blue wearing a badge. "Your brakes need a little adjusting too. You'll find you car against a tree down in the canyon. Just look over yonder cliff if you don't believe me."

*****
The boy friend was over-seas and sent money as a Christmas present to his girl friend back in the states. He had noticed the last time he was on leave that she was gaining a little weight and he thought to make her a present of an exercise bike, so consequently he sent off the money.

The girl was a bit miffed at the fellow's not so subtle suggestion for her Christmas present and while in a pet store with a friend, impulsively bought a pet monkey that had taken a fancy to her.

Not realizing that she had neglected telling him she had not carried out his request, some months passed when in one of her letters, she complained that everything was fine except for one thing. "Can you believe it?" she wrote. "All the hair is falling off my monkey."

In the next post came back her boy friend's urgent message. "Call the Goodwill and donate your bicycle to them. Get rid of it, quick!"

*****

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