HUMOR Digest - 24 Apr 1997 to 25 Apr 1997

Date: Thu, 24 Apr 1997 04:09:10 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Mrs JimJr & Wives

I guess we all get in somewhat of a rut from time to time, but I vowed just the other day to get out more often and maybe even do some traveling. You see, my wife has kept a diary since she was a teenager. Now I've always respected her privacy, but it was just too tempting. She was outside tending to her flowers and I happened to see the diary open on the kitchen table.

I couldn't resist and quickly took a peek. There were like 114 pages of nothing but ditto marks for this year alone.

If your wife doesn't feel well gentlemen, do what I do to speed her recovery -- offer to help with the housework. If you don't think there's such a thing as a miracle recovery, you oughta see my wife get well again every time I start to vacuum the windows.

But let's get real here guys, I mean who exactly are we kidding ?

A husband controls his wife in much the same manner as a barometer controls the weather.

A recent study showed that the average husband only actual speaks to his wife about thirty-seven minutes each week. Well, yeah, I can believe that, I mean just how long does it take to say "Uh-huh" or "Yes dear" or "I'm sorry" ?

I never realized just how many vitamin and mineral supplements my wife was taking these days until just the other morning she got out of bed, stretched and then slowly turned North.

My wife is redecorating our house again. We'd had this house about twelve years now, and I can't say how many times she's done it over, but so far, she's never had to dust.

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