HUMOR Digest - 22 Oct 1997 to 23 Oct 1997

Date: Wed, 22 Oct 1997 03:52:00 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Politics as Usual

There's a of good things about living under a system of gov't such as we have in the US. Democracy, free speech, etc. But I think my favorite is the fact that only one of the clowns running for most offices will be elected. Of course, in the case of the Clintons, we got a two-for-one co-presidency whether we wanted one or not.

Overheard in a Washington DC restaurant -- one girl to another: "What I'm looking for is a man who will treat me as if I were a voter and he a candidate in a race where every vote counted."

Never fear out there ladies, Mrs JimJr does at times get the best of me. During the last Election Day, while I was reading the newspaper, she dialed a number on the phone and then said, "Hello, Mr Gallup ? I've changed my mind."

Ever since the landing on Mars, Martian stories have been running wild. The last one I heard was about one who landed in Las Vegas.

After watching a series of players pumping the arms of the slot machines, the Martian stepped up and whispered, "I don't know what offices you guys are running for, but disabled or not, you've got to try to smile a bit when you shake those hands."

Contrast our system of government with Brazil's. Their states are divided into "Municipios". One losing candidate in his concession speech said, "I'd like to thank the 600 voters who said they would vote for me as well as the 800 who said they did. The final tally out of the 1,100 voters in our district, was my worthy opponent 3,412 to my 72 loyal supporters."

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