Pain, pain, pain. Bored, bored, bored.

Monday
February 22, 1999
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Pain, pain, pain. Closely followed by it’s (surprisingly) not too distant cousin Bored, bored, bored.

During this past week, my idea of what constituted boredom and what really IS boredom have met head on.

The pain thing didn’t need much explanation - it was there. Constantly and unrelentingly, hurting me. Pain the likes of which I have not experienced before, no relief with eyes wide open, none with eyes firmly shut, a little relief with anaesthetic drops. Imagine someone poking a toothpick in your eye, someone else making sure there’s “just enough” sand in there, and someone else telling you all the while - “This will pass, by Friday you’ll be driving”.

Ha!

Then keep in mind that this pain goes on 24 hours a day - without subsidence, and is made worse by the fact that I can’t bloody well see anything.

Somehow the pain wouldn’t be so bad if I could see. Because with the unrelenting pain, came the boredom. Hours of breath catching pain, coupled with an equal measure of boredom. Can’t read, can’t watch telly, can’t focus on anything.

So now we’re bored. Bored, bored, bored.

Am able to produce this page by typing the copy in MSWord with the font set to 40pt and the display set to 200%

The reality of what boredom IS won. (As reality surely will) To date the statistics are as follows:-

  • 1 x PRK Laser eye fixing procedure.
  • 1 x “Bomb” of prescription drugs.
  • 1 x Baggie of sundry other prescription drugs and anaesthetic drops (The value of which was to unfold later), cotton swabs (?still don’t know what they’re for) a roll of micropore tape (?ditto on the tape).
  • 1 x Appointment to attend the clinic for a ollowup the next morning.

    This is just post op stuff here, my house is full of little baggies marked (I’ve been told) LEFT and RIGHT which contain the myriad drops and creams and other crap that I have to administer into one or both eyes at any given time in a day. Some things are six times a day, some two, some four, others three a day, one is one time a day. The endless dilemmas about what time of day I should have the one a day drop or cream is about all I have to defray the boredom. My life has been reduced to this boring, sodding, half blind mess.

    The annoyingly chirpy Clinical Optometrist that seems to be looking after me is driving me bananas. Because along the way we’ve discovered the following, absolutely riveting facts about ME:-

  • I’m a slow healer
  • I have a very low pain threshold
  • “Well, no. I don’t suppose you will be driving by Friday.”
  • I have a very low boredom threshold.
  • I am very cranky when I am in pain.
  • Suggestions of enjoyable things I can look forward to once I’m up and around, DO NOT cheer me up. (As one hapless visitor found out.)

    So as it stands I have spent 9 full days and nights in excruciating pain. Then all of a sudden on Sunday I woke up and my eyes felt normal again. I cautiously opened my eyes, but shit no banana. Still can’t see. However today - Monday morning, I can see - except it’s all in double vision, but I did have a moment of clarity this morning and was able to read a little.

    I’m hoping that tomorrow I might wake up, with no pain, no blurry, no double, and almost useable eyesight.

    Sick of all this now. Everyone is sick of hearing me say “This is the stupidest thing I have ever done.”

    To tell the truth, I’m sick of saying it.


                           
    For My Listening Pleasure
    Lauren Hill
    The Mis-Education of Lauren Hill

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