PassionMay 27, 1997
St Kilda East.I want to love someone with all my being. I want to feel as though another person in invading my soul, possessing me, devouring me.
That familliar feeling of restless anxiety, a wandering gaze, straying thoughts, shifted focus. I want love to define me, to give me bounds, to set me on a course, to contain all that I need to be. To leave nothing left for anyone else, even for me.
I want to quake before another person, I want to feel my heart beat fast and my throat catch with unspoken emotion. I want to feel inescapable passion and lust. I want to feel a hundred feet tall and all powerful. I want to know passion and heart rending love. Again
I have loved like this before. We almost tore each other apart, and it surely would have been fatal if we had let our relationship run its course. But as an older, wiser and different person I am ready again for this kind of all or nothing love. At the end I was tired, sated, full. Worn out and ready for some peace and quiet.
I am emerging, finding my way again. I have felt clouded and foggy for such a long time and I have been searching for a reason. But I think I know now, I really think I do. I am ready to love like that again. I am prepared to risk everything. To give all that I have. To feel like that again, even if only for a moment, a second, a breath. It would be enough.
Unending Love
I seem to have loved you in numberless forms,
numberless times,
In life after life, in age after age, forever.
My spell-bound heart has made and re-made the
necklace of songs
That you take as a gift, wear round your neck in
your many forms
In life after life, in age after age forever.
Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, its age-old
pain,
Its ancient tale of being apart or together,
As I stare on and on into the past, in the end you
emerge
Clad in the light of a pole-star piercing the
darkness of time:
You become an image of what is remembered
forever.
You and I have floated here on the stream that
brings from the fount
At the heart of time love of one for another.
We have played alongside millions of lovers, shared
in the same
Shy sweetness of meeting, the same distressful
tears of farewell--
Old love, but in shapes that renew and renew
forever
Today it is heaped at your feet, it has found its
end in you,
The love of all man's days both past and forever:
Universal joy, universal sorrow, universal life,
The memories of all loves merging with this one
love of ours--
And the songs of every poet past and forever.
Rabindranath Tagore
Indian, 1886-1941
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