Just a little "what if" story about my favourite (if
*very* minor) Ranma 1/2 character. Basically, the
premise is, "What if Ranma decided to tell Mikado
Sanzenin about his curse?"
-=-
Ranma 1/2 Fanfic:
"Slippery When Wet"
by Cherryne Edejer (aviatrix88@yahoo.com)
-=-
Mikado Sanzenin sat calmly in the hot baths at the
municipal skating rink, eyes closed. It had been a
particularly trying skating practice; Azusa had found
something cute again. He touched the bumps behind his
head and winced. He suspected he had developed a certain
amount of resistance to the blows she gave him, as
they would've killed a lesser man, but they still
*hurt*.
"Yo, Sanzenin."
Mikado opened his eyes. At the entrance to the baths,
stood Ranma Saotome, with a towel wrapped around his
waist. He raised an eyebrow.
"Yes?"
"C'mere for a second."
Mikado paused for a moment, then shrugged. He grabbed
a towel and wrapped it around his waist, then stepped
out of the bath. The other men in the public bath began
to stare at them both, but they ignored it.
"What is it, Saotome?" he asked, a touch irritably.
Mikado gestured at the steam-filled room around him.
"This is hardly the place for one to issue a challenge."
"I didn't say nothin' about challenging you," replied
Ranma quietly. "I just wanted to show you somethin',
that's all." Mikado arced his eyebrow again.
"Oh? And what may that be?"
Without a word, Ranma filled a bath pail with cold water
and lifted it over his head. "This." He poured the water
over himself.
Mikado stared. If some of the bathhouse patrons weren't
paying attention before, they were certainly doing so
now. Ranma-chan glared at them.
"What are you looking at, you perverts?" She snatched a
bucket of hot water and poured it over herself,
reverting back to male form. It was at this moment that
Mikado was finally able to speak.
"You're... You're that pig-tailed girl..." he trailed
off weakly.
"Yeah. Disappointed?" Ranma smirked. Mikado placed a
hand to his head, a vein throbbing in his forehead.
"Do you mean to tell me... All this time... I had kissed
a *man*?!"
"Whoa. So you're not so dumb after all, eh, Maniacal
Sex-Fiend?"
"For the last time, that's *Mikado Sanzenin*! And how
dare you toy with my affections like that!" Ranma
blinked in surprise, then in anger.
"What are you talkin' about? *You* kissed *me*,
remember?" Mikado clenched a fist.
"To think I should debase myself by kissing a *man*...
Ranma Saotome... You make me sick!" In one swift
motion, Mikado kicked Ranma squarely on the chest.
Caught off guard by this surprise attack, Ranma slid
across the tiled floor and hit the wall with a
resounding thump. As usual, Ranma shook it off.
"Okay, jerk," he growled. "If that's the way you want to
play it..." He picked himself off the floor and launched
himself at Mikado, who watched his approach
unflinchingly.
At the last possible moment, Mikado sidestepped Ranma's
attack, and with a cold expression on his face, tripped
him. Ranma went sprawling into the hot bath behind him.
He resurfaced, spluttering.
"You're just *askin'* for it now, Sanzenin!"
To the amazed eyes of the onlooking bathers, he jumped
out of the bath, and threw a punch at Mikado,
which the latter easily dodged. But Ranma was ready for
that this time, and followed up with a lightning quick
fist to the face. To his surprise, Mikado slid back,
avoiding the punch. He then neatly pirouetted and aimed
a kick at Ranma's face, who just managed to duck in
time.
As the fight progressed, it repeated that same pattern:
Whenever Ranma would try to attack Mikado, the latter
would move just out of reach, but close enough to be
able to fight back. What's going on? thought Ranma to
himself, as he blocked another of Sanzenin's reversals.
Mikado slid across the room away from Ranma, amused by
the frustrated expression on his opponent's face.
"Problem, Saotome? Surely you can't be tired yet."
"I'm just gettin' warmed up, Sanzenin," replied Ranma,
gritting his teeth. Looks like it's time I brought out
the big guns, he thought to himself. He decided to wait
for Sanzenin to attack this time.
Mikado watched his opponent. So, he wants me to attack
now, he thought. Too bad. He will come to regret his
mistake... Mikado slid back deceptively, then swerved
around. He accelerated towards Ranma, preparing to kick
him.
Ranma steeled himself for the coming attack. "That's
right, you jerk. Closer... Closer..." Just when Mikado's
kick was about to reach him, he cried out, "Katchou
tenshin ameguriken!"
Mikado was surprised by the flurry of fists about to
touch him, but not enough so that he couldn't react.
He quickly changed his attack: "Dance of Death!"
The other bathers watched in fascination at the speed
of Ranma's punches, and Mikado's attempt to block them
with his spinning attack. It was difficult to tell who
was winning; both were moving so fast! But, eventually,
both wound down. They moved away, and circled each other
warily.
Damn! thought Ranma. When did he get so fast?
"Surprised?" asked Mikado, mirroring his thoughts.
"After our last fight ended in a draw, I trained myself
to be faster, just to make sure that wouldn't happen
again." A slight frown appeared on his face. "But it
seems that you've been training, too..."
Ranma let a bit of a smile appear on his face. So, not
as confident as you seem, huh? he thought. Maybe I can
work that to my advantage. Ranma frowned. Now, if I
could only figure out how he's moving around so fast...
Ranma was so caught up in his thoughts that he wasn't
paying attention to where he was stepping. His foot
slipped on a soapy puddle, which sent him falling
heavily to the ground.
"Damn! Stupid slippery floor!" he snarled. Then Ranma
stared at the wet tiles beneath him. That's it! he
thought. That's how Sanzenin's moving so fast! Thoughts
flew through his mind: how easily Mikado moved across
the floor, his swift attacks, and the Dance of Death.
How could I be so blind? /He's sliding around the wet
floor just like he's skating on an ice rink!/
He had just realized this when it suddenly also occurred
to Ranma that Mikado was launching another attack. He
managed to roll away just as a flying kick soared above
Ranma, barely missing him. Instead, Mikado's kick struck
a faucet behind him, knocking off the tap. A jet of
water shot out, hitting Ranma dead on.
"Hey! That's cold!" Cold? Oh no... Ranma-chan stood up,
wiping water from her face. She glared defiantly at
Mikado. Mikado stared at her. His eyes narrowed.
"Don't think that I will go any easier on you, just
because you're a woman, now," he said quietly. "I know
you're really a man."
"I wouldn't have it any other way." Ranma-chan smirked.
Perhaps this could work to her advantage after all. At
any rate, at least she knew how he was attacking her,
and could think up a countermeasure.
The fight started up again. Ranma-chan had to admit she
was impressed by Mikado's self control: Despite the fact
that he avoided looking at her bare chest, he indeed
didn't seem to back down; if anything, he fought even
harder! He must be *really* ticked off, Ranma-chan
thought wryly. At least she was faster as a girl, and
could now keep up with him better. She wondered if she
should try sliding around the floor like Mikado was
doing. Nah, thought Ranma-chan. She hated to admit it,
but she wasn't a very good skater. If only I could get
him off this slippery surface! Then I could have the
advantage! Finally, she got an idea.
Ranma-chan narrowly dodged one of Mikado's spinning
punches and scaled the bathhouse wall. Grabbing the top
of it, she balanced herself, then turned around and made
a face at him. "Catch me if you can!" Mikado lifted an
eyebrow.
"To think, I thought you were above such cowardice."
Ranma-chan bristled at the word 'cowardice', but bit her
tongue. "Very well." Mikado dashed across the wet floor
like a speed skater, then launched himself at the wall.
Sucker! thought Ranma-chan. She bounced off the wall,
towards the airbourne Mikado. As she soon as she got
close enough, she grabbed him with one hand, and drew
back the other. "Katchou tenshin ameguriken!"
Caught off guard, Mikado gasped. Instinctively, he tried
to twist away from the attack. But Ranma-chan was was
holding him, and he only succeeded in sending them into
a descending spiral to the floor as she pounded at his
chest. He tried to block the punches, but by then it was
too late...
They hit the ground with a thud. Ranma-chan was not
above using Mikado to break her fall, especially after
that "cowardice" remark. She got to her feet as Mikado
lay on the floor, the wind knocked out of him.
"Huh. Well, that'll show him." The watching bathers
clapped appreciatively. She heard a moan behind her, and
was surprised to see Mikado sitting up, rubbing the back
of his head.
"Yes, I quite agree," he said, surprising her even more.
"Perhaps I was wrong." Ranma-chan crossed her arms in
front of her.
"About...?"
"About my kissing you and how it was your fault," Mikado
said quite calmly. "Perhaps it was mine, after all." He
looked at her. "I guess was so upset at the thought of
kissing another man, I couldn't think clearly. And I
apologize for attacking you." At his admission of guilt,
Ranma-chan suddenly felt bad about her attitude.
"Ah, ferget about it," she murmured. "You didn't know
I was a guy. And I don't blame you for attacking
me; I can't say I was too happy about your kissing me,
either." Mikado stood up and walked over towards her.
"Then shall we call a truce?" Mikado held out a hand
towards Ranma-chan. She stared at it for a moment, then
shrugged.
"Yeah, whatever." She put her hand in his, in a firm
handshake. Mikado smiled at Ranma-chan. Then he leaned
down and...
Fortunately, she saw it coming this time.
-=-
Azusa Shiratori skated morosely around the ice. She was
supposed to be practicing with Mikado, but he had left
early, complaining of a headache. Azusa pouted. On top
of that, she couldn't find anything that was cute. This
was because most of the people at the rink knew about
Azusa's little obsession, and kept their personal
objects, as well as themselves, at a distance.
Preferrably a large distance.
All of a sudden, there was a loud crash from the
direction of the men's baths. There was a sound as if
something was sailing over the rink; then that something
smashed through the dome of the ice rink. Mikado landed
with an unusual, if understandable, lack of grace on the
ice. It cracked beneath him. Azusa skated up to her
prone partner.
"San-chan...?" she inquired, looking down at him.
Suddenly, Azusa's eyes lit up. She let out a squeal of
delight.
"Ooo! Lysander! How cuuuuuuuute!" Mikado's eyes snapped
open, a look of horror beginning to creep onto his face.
-=-
Ranma sat quietly in a hot bath. He decided to change
back to his boy-form; he was getting far too many odd
looks for his liking. Besides, after what that pervert
tried to do... *Again*... Despite the steam rising from the
water, Ranma shivered. That guy was a kissaholic! Good
thing I booted him before he could try it, the jerk...
His train of thought was interrupted by two people
arguing at the tops of their voices.
"No, Azusa, you *cannot* have it!" There was a desperate
edge to the speaker's voice.
"But San-chan, it's so cute! Lysander! Lysander!"
"I said no!"
"I want it! I want it!"
There was the sound of somebody stamping their foot on
the ice, then a pained scream, as might be made by
someone whose bare foot was stomped on by somebody
wearing ice skates. Then there was a giggle of triumph.
"Lysander! Hee hee!"
"YOU WHINING BRAT!! COME BACK HERE WITH MY TOWEL!!"
"Hey, isn't that Mikado Sanzenin?"
"And he's got no clothes on!"
"Eeeeeeeeeeeeek!"
"Get him!"
"Wait! Ladies! You don't understand-- ARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!"
"Hmph. I always knew that guy was a pervert."
"I dunno, I think he's kind of cute..."
Huh, thought Ranma, tuning out the rest. Serves him
right. Lousy jerk... He sank into the hot bath, with the
supreme comfort of someone not receiving the pain... For
once.
END
-=-
Okay, I have to say this because I have the sneaking
suspicion somebody will think otherwise... Lysander
is the towel, okay? So there. Nyah. ^_~ (If it wasn't,
Azusa wouldn't have run off with the towel, now would
she?) Incidently, "Lysander" is the title character
from the novel "The Man Who Made Husbands Jealous",
a title which sort of reminds me of Mikado... ^_^
-=-
Copyright, Cherryne Edejer 1998. Ranma 1/2 characters
created by Rumiko Takahashi and used without permission.
(
geocities.com/colosseum/arena) (
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