World Cup Follies
Recently, I was watching The World Cup. Let me tell you, for me, an uneducated, lazy American, it was like a geography lesson for me. "The Kingdom of Wutan vs. Shala Shala Bing Bang"...
This skit takes place in a commentary box at The World Cup soccer game.
Ronny:Well Mike, this is going to be an interesting match between the Kingdom of Wutan and Shala Shala Bing Bang.
Mike:You're right Ron. The Kingdom of Wutan is known for their great soccer players, but when you're playing Shala Shala Bing Bang, you have to take into consideration their prime striker, Freddy Gooding(pronounced E-Bolo-Cha-Kang-Ka-Nig-Gits).
Ronny:Good point Mike. Well, it looks like they are going through the pre-game ceremonoies. Yes, the Wutanans are bringing out the virgin, and here comes their priest with the sacrificial dagger. He's raising his dagger above his head, and now he pulls out the cheese. Okay, he just cut the cheese, and we're ready to get started here.
Mike:You can tell that the Wutanans are serious about soccer when they have a ceremony like that.
Ronny:You're right Mike. Well, the Bangians are lining up for the start of the game. Freddy Smith is taking the kick, and his wing man John Smith(pronounced Jo-hn Smith) is setting up along side of him. Here's the kick to John Smith, Freddy is streaking up field, passed three midfielders, John kicks the ball downfield to Freddy, Freddy's got it. He dribbles pass the defenders, passed the sweeper just him and the goal keeper, he shoots...off the wood!
Mike:You know Ron, sometimes a goalie's wood is his best friend.
Ronny:Yes. Well, the ball recovered by Wutanans. They are pushing up the field. They are really running circles around the Bangians. The ball is in the open field, the Wutanan striker has the ball, he shoots, passed the Bangian goal keeper, and they score!
Mike:That was a lovely show of inertia by the Bangian goal keeper.
Ronny:Did I give you permission to talk?
Mike:(Submissivly)No master.
Ronny:You are forgiven. This section of the World Cup brought to you commercial free by the makers of Junky. Junky has a million uses, from rat poisioning to margariane subsitute. Buy your Junky today.
Mike:Well, they are setting up for the kick off, and with the score 1-0, we will suddenly stop the game.