Alabama:
      At Least We're not Mississippi

      Alaska:
      11,623 Eskimos Can't be Wrong!

      Arizona:
      But It's a Dry Heat

      Arkansas:
      Litterasy Ain't Everthing

      California:
      As Seen on TV

      Colorado:
      If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother

      Connecticut:
      Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character

      Delaware:
      We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water

      Florida:
      Ask Us About Our Grandkids

      Georgia:
      We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism

      Hawaii:
      Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru
      (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

      Idaho:
      More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We're Not, But The
Potatoes Sure Are Real Good!!

      Illinois:
      Please Don't Pronounce the "S"

      Indiana:
      2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

      Iowa:
      We Do Amazing Things With Corn

      Kansas:
      First Of The Rectangle States

      Kentucky:
      Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

      Louisiana:
      We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign

      Maine:
      We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

      Maryland:
      A Thinking Man's Delaware

      Massachusetts:
      Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

      Michigan:
      First Line of Defense From the Canadians

      Minnesota:
      "10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes"

      Mississippi:
      Come Feel Better About Your Own State

      Missouri:
      Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work

      Montana:
      Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, and Very Little Else

      Nebraska:
      Ask About Our State Motto Contest

      Nevada:
      Whores and Poker!

      New Hampshire:
      Go Away and Leave Us Alone

      New Jersey:
      Ya Wanna ##$%##% Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##% Motto Right Here!

      New Mexico:
      Lizards Make Excellent Pets

      New York:
      You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney...

      North Carolina:
      Tobacco is a Vegetable

      North Dakota:
      We Really are One of the 50 States!

      Ohio:
      We Wish We Were In Michigan

      Oklahoma:
      Like the Play, only No Singing

      Oregon:
      Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner

      Pennsylvania:
      Cook With Coal

      Rhode Island:
      We're Not REALLY An Island

      South Carolina:
      Remember the Civil War?  We Didn't Actually Surrender.

      South Dakota:
      Closer Than North Dakota

      Tennessee:
      The Educashun State

      Texas:
      Si' Hablo Ing'les
      (Yes, I speak English)

      Utah:
      Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus.

      Vermont:
      Yep

      Virginia:
      Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

      Washington:
      Help! We're Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!

      Washington, D.C.:
      Wanna Be Mayor?

      West Virginia:
      One Big Happy Family -- Really!

      Wisconsin:
      Eat Cheese or Die

      Wyoming:
      Wynot?