This lady surprised a burglar in her kitchen.  He was all loaded down
with the things he was going to steal. She had no weapon and was all
alone.  The only thing that she could think to do was quote scripture.

So,  she holds up a hand and says:  "ACTS 2:38!!!"

The burglar quakes in fear and then freezes to the point that she is
able to get to the phone and call 911 for the cops.  When the cops
arrive, the burglar is still frozen in place.  They are very much
surprised that a woman alone with no weapon could do this.  One of them
asked the lady: "How did you do this?"

The woman replied:  "I quoted scripture."

The cop turned the burglar:  "What was it about the scripture that had
such an effect on you?"

The burglar replied: "Scripture!  What scripture?

I thought she said she had an ax and two 38's."