She falls
6/3- You quench my fears and calm my tremors
6/6- "These days it fells like I'm fading."
"Do you see yourself in me?"
6/7- Washing all of you from me.
where is she where is that little girl?
lost inside me I suppose
She's mighty lost.
6/9- She is cotton candy lonely
she is candy apple grey
she is kindly waiting for you
In a solitary way
6/13- Sorry baby she's just not in the mood tonight
6/24- It's a dark night
of no light
Beautiful none the less
a peaceful kind of night
6/26- She is slowly melting for you
baby she's all runny
can't help the waves of hope that keep washing over me
I'm drowning in it.
6/28- I love to bring you gifts of sugar and cream
I love to see you smile
You may have been him when we started
but you where someone else when we left.
6/29- "Let's go chasing dragons in the snow."
"And I don't want to go home right now."
"Life shouldn't need a narrator."
The jubilant angels danced lightly together, hand in hand, heart to heart.
7/3- If she's your fashion goddess
and she's your wonderful fun friend
then what part do I play in the drama that is that is you.
The phycho problematic girl that calls all the time?
7/5- she's the real girl and she's losing it all
"Even if you're on the rigth track, you'll get hit if you're standing still."- Will Rogers
7/6- "We're here and now will we ever be again?"
7/9- "I'm not the toughest girl in the world since you tore me apart."
I feel like I'm not really a part of you.
Like I've been replaced,
or traded in for a better model.
7/12- Almost As Blue
Roll With It Baby
You don't know how hard it is to watch you drive away.
7/15- "What if there's no air there?"
7/19- And then there's him.
He's everywhere
touching, holding
We always just will be.
7/20- The world turned upside down today
I lost it today
7/22- A wispy willow thought of you
a memory that got lost on the way through
GOD sometimes you just don't come through.
7/23- Somewhere skies are blue
but not here sweet heart
nothing but black tonight
but somewhere skies are blue
maybe with you.
7/25- I'm trying not to move it's just your ghost passing through
said I'm trying not to move it's just your ghost passing through
and now I'm quite sure there's a light in your platoon
never seen a light move like yours can do to me
so know I'm wishing for my best impression.
7/28- for her and her and him and all of those who will never take you away from me
just a bit of a shadow girl tonight
I'm afraid.
7/30- The ghost in you she don't fade away
7/31- It's hard or it's hardly at all
and in the end it's not what you can do for her it's the times that you can reach her
I'm too young for this
I'm too old for this
I'm too tired for this
I'll do it all tomorrow
8/1- Try not to hurt me ok
Why can't the moon shine down on me
you can kill my heart but not my soul
but let's try and keep the executions down to a minimum ok?
Now everybody all hold hands and spin around
The End
8/3- It's a big big world and I'm currently all alone
even the mom is suggesting I run to you
But I don't want to run to anyone
I just don't want to be where I am
I am smarter then this is lending me to be.
8/4- Promises you'll never keep surround me like cobwebs I'm trying to brush away
"And the stars fell down laughing when they heard her hoping that she would be the only ocean he'd shine upon."
Isn't my blue water ocean enough?
8/5- This is not about then this is just about now.
If I where your September oh the things that I would do
Tragic and hopeless you be a movie star too
then you won't be so sad when I have to leave
YOU
8/12- You make me want to stay for awhile you make me want to spend forever in your arms
'cuz I know that you feel me somehow
I'm afraid of carnies, nomads, smell like cabbage, tiny hands.
8/13- Wild boy I worry about you
and your future
and what you are going to do with your life
you are so full of good intentions
Like no other boy I know
I hope she's your dream girl
I hope she's your soulmate
I hope her boyfriend doesn't mind.
you give nice hugs
8/15- I understand where you are coming from
sometimes you just need to let it out.
but seriously are you so oblivious that you don't realize
inconsiderate male
I guess you apoligized
I guess that's great
I guess you'll call
yippee Skippee
fucking world
8/17- My head hurts and my wrists hurt and my eyes burn because it's lateand i've been crying too much and holding it back too much
and how come just when I get close to you you get ripped away
and I'll never sleep tonight with all these unnessary angels keeping me thinking of you
Sometimes my soul doesn't whisper
sometimes it screams and hits car windows
and drives away in a slow silent numbness
sometimes I scream
8/18- "They dress you up in white satin
and they give you your very own pair of wings
in August and everything after
I'm after everything."
8/19- January Girl by the woods patiently impatiently waiting
why do I let my exspectations get so high
why won't you let me try
things just won't be as they were
Why do I build myself up to be dissapointed
why do I left myself be carried away by you
8/23- a letter
you know who you are
overcome this
drown me
take me away
just let me lay here
wash over me
come back to me
don't leave me
watch me fall as you walk away
burn me
leave me
don't look back
Just Breathe
9/1- God it's been a long today, and you're not even over 9/2- Too bad you have to be this way 9/4- I love to roll around and revial in moments 9/7- I want most of all just to get lost in you 9/8- Deep thoughts, scarey thoughts i am never going to be one of your fans 9/10- I'm sorry you feel that way 9/11- I know you're going back to her Why don't you go meet yourself a reall NICE girl I'd rather have these things weigh on my mind 9/17- To be the one you're with and not the one you want leaves me in a black pool of loneliness 9/20- I want a palace 9/24- The colored lights sweep you across my mind 9/29- You leave me in the dust sometimes 10/16- You never give me as much as I give you 10/26- The way he loves her is beautiful, but obscene, mostly obscene because I'm not the one he loves 11/5- I'm in a place I can't be your "little Cutie" What is she worth to you? This is the place I am 11/17- Welcome to the "Rose Colored Times" he said, holding out his hand 12/8- I want you to want to see me I don't want to be something to do if there is nothing else I only wish you would treat me like you treat the others I want to be loved, 12/9- She justifies 12/11- And you just won;t let me be her 12/14- Being that girl 12/15- and who I am is not beautiful or wonderful to you 1/2- It's a new year but life doesn't change just like that 1/6- "We laughed 'cause the world is Absurd and Beautiful and small" 2/22- "Maybe I on;y have a minute before I have to go 3/6- I'm trying not to let you get to me 3/16- he said he'd remember but he'd already forgot 3/24- She twinkles and she doesn't even know it 4/5- So I'll put on my raincoat ad jump throught the puddles of our memories 4/10- We fight too much Click On on the Doorway to Return to the Main Page
we are like a roller coaster up and down
stop this
shut up
but oh, don't don't leave
'cause nobody wants to be alone
you hurt me
probably more then I hurt myself
I know you think you can't help me
but you can
all I ask is that you don't treat me like I'm broken
or stupid
I know who I am
I don't think you do
I think maybe you don't want to bother yourself with figuring it out
I'm not the person I was when I left you
I just think you haven't taken the time to notice
you have to know I've slapped some more walls up
i've locked you out
I think it is some sort of surival technique
I wish you would see
I know that you don't
And even if you do you'll pretend that you don't
I think it is some sort of survival technique
to savor and enjoy seconds that may never happen again
sometimes I feel very safe
and never found.
Clouding my judgement but making me think
Your words can burn me deep
sometimes you scald me.
I'm sorry you treat me that way
you don't respect me
sometimes you don't respect me
sometimes you hurt me.
I can feel you leave
i can see you turning around
turning your back on me
I can see me falling falling falling down.
I want a prince
I want to leave all of this
unveil me from the shrouds of mystery
robe me in lonliness
but mearly love me
I want only to spend forever in this place
and you would drag me away so quickly
little of this do I understand.
leaving me tired
and lonely
and wanting
not that I don't understand
because it's all about the breathing
and who falls first
stuck in this web of lies
and lying to you
Where's the respect?
Is this really Heathy?
a place you won't go
a place you ask about
I'm lost in thought and so are you
What if nothing is wrong?
What if this is exactly how I am?
I can't be everything for you.
I am being who I think you want me to be,
it's not
"this is cooling"
And what am I worth to you?
Why do you ask me to come out and play and then leave just as I'm coming out the door?
Pause a second,
Tarry a minute,
let this all go for a bit
and only hold me like you haven't done in days.
"This Is Cooling"
take me home now
only, come along please,
goodnight
"this is cooling"
She stepped back and feel
That girl was always falling down
I don't want to be your sometimes girl, or your burden
I want you to miss me when I'm not there and love to see me when I am
I want you to think of me fondly and find me cute and charming
or your bit of something to pass the time.
no, I don't want to be your everything
but I want to be your something
Why can't you make plans with me
Why am I your non-plans
Not sorta liked on the weekends
I think he knows and doesn't mind
she's making herself be
not necessarily making the most wise decisions
I can only hope that there is an understanding with-in us
and I don't even know if I want to
and still...
and he won't let
and he won't let
and he won't let me be
I can never be her
It is something you see beyond
honestly, you make me feel transparent at times
like you can see right through me
like I can see right through me too1999
Happy New Year
Stop Screwing up
Happy New Year
stop lying to everyone
(Exspecially yourself)
Happy New Year
get your life in order
happy New year
Start living
happy new year
just breathe
happy new year
don't be stupid
happy new year
"I love you"
hardly
happy new year
A minute is all my life has ever allowed
let's grow old and die together
let's do it know
he just tries my patience
Some of them warm me
some cover me all over
but the last ones will give me a cold
you where so cold at the end
I think I should go back inside
Do you think this is what I want
do you think I enjoy it when you raise your voice at me
This is not what I wanted at all