Inner Turmoil
by Juliet Benson
What REALLY is running through the Newsies minds during the rally
Jack: I sure hope this works. Otherwise I’ll look like an idiot.
Snitch: Geez, Jack looks like an idiot with that shirt. Doesn’t match his shoes.
Sarah: Is my hat on straight? I should have gone for navy bows!
David: I don’t like the way Sarah’s eyeing Jack. Maybe I should try to communicate my strong dislike through the ever effective squinting of the eyes.
Les: Where’s the candy? This joint sucks.
Sarah: David’s glaring at me. What’s wrong?
Jack: Boy, do I look hot tonight.
Skittery: This is stupid. *yawn*
Racetrack: Let’s see; five cents times twenty…
Sarah: Do I have something in my teeth? No, that would warrant a more desperate gesture.
Racetrack: Times five…
Jack: Yep, yep, yep, I am one hot stud.
Spot: Does this shirt make me look fat?
Skittery: Stupid, stupor, stupid, stooped, stupid…
Sarah: Is my dress askew?
David: She’s not getting it.
Racetrack: Plus thirty…
Sarah: No, dress straight, hair in place, teeth clean and gunk free.
Racetrack: Divided by seven…
David: Oh no! Now she’s turning on Major Lamb’s Eyes! Watch out Jack!
Jack: And boy, am I glad there’s a mirror in the back wall so I can see my good-looking form through out this whole rally.
Skittery: Stupid, vapid, dull, insipid, moronic, tedious…
Sarah: Oh good! Jack’s looking this way!
Racetrack: Subtract fifty…
Jack: Well, hello there, handsome, what’s your name? Jack, you say? Forgive me for being too blase, but you have fabulous skin!0
Racetrack: Jack’s skin looks really good in this light.
Sarah: Oh, boy, is his skin gorgeous.
Les: When I grow up, I want skin like Jack’s.
Skittery: Though Jack’s skin does looks healthy here, it’s still a stupid place.
Snitch: Matching shirt or not, Jack does have great skin.
Spot: I may be the leader of Brooklyn, but I’ll never have skin like Jack’s.
Racetrack: Time three…
The majority of the newsies: Where’s Medda?
Random Newsie Named Bobo: I hope we don’t burst out into song or anything.
*music starts up*
Jack: Here we go!
Spot: Here we go!
David: Here we go!
Bobo: Oh, great.