Words For The Wise

Greetings,

In case you haven’t noticed...it has been awhile since I put a letter together. Things have been pretty busy and since this is a self- published venture it takes awhile to put it all together. As always, I hope this finds you well; and I hope you will find the things contained herein useful. I have been sending these letters out for 12 years if you can believe it. Someday I may put them all in a book. May your holidays be filled with joy and love.

Travel Schedule

I will be in New York and Dallas, TX. In December. If you or a friend would like to schedule an appointment you can call Claudia in New York or Hope in Dallas and they will be glad to set something up and answer any questions you may have. The rates are still $125.oo for an hour, $65.oo for a half hour. As always, I do appreciate your referrals and your confidence in my work. I recommend booking your appointment as early as possible.

New York December 10-19 Contact: Claudia Frank 212-426-0596 Dallas Dec 22,23, 27 Contact: Hope Fitzgerald 214-826-2106

Gift Certificates

Every year clients ask if gift certificates are available. The answer is yes. You can either call or contact me by mail, or print one right off this site. Click here.Gift certificates are of course pre-paid and are sent to your friends or family and redeemable for 18 months.

Spirituality As the Context of Life

I know that I think of myself as a spiritual being. However, when the circumstances of life seem to close in and “stress” for my attention, I can get overwhelmed and easily lose track of that spiritual center, and, even lose track of God.

Think about your life for a second. You have all your hopes- security, success, love, money; and then all your fears- security, success, love, money. Sometimes the hope and fear seem to be at war with one another and fear may actually seem to have the upper hand. The more fear rules the less patience we have, the more we feel attacked, the more personally we take things and the more out of control things can appear.

Since we think of ourselves as “God- centered” spiritual beings to begin with- we might actually, in the overwhelm, slip into a denial of the situation- that the circumstances are running our lives, that life has us rather than the other way around. It will continue that way until something jars us out of the inertia of the pattern. Jolted awake, we may start to question the reality and the world around us. You may judge yourself, thinking “I thought I learned all this before” or you may simply feel “lost”.

What exactly then IS a spiritual life? Does is mean renouncing the “real” world in favor of retreating to a monastic existence? Does it mean walking around in a constant state of prayer? Or, does it mean expanding your perceptions to include a spiritual perspective without denying the event and circumstances all the while staying aware of the power and the spirit that exists within?

I have often said that it is not so much what happens in our lives that matters, as much as it is our response to it. Our first response is liable to be our feelings. If pain is present we may jump immediately to the mind to find reasons for the pain and take appropriate measures to fix it- rather than just accepting it and allowing the feelings to lead us ever onward in self-discovery. I know I figure that my mind can save me from the pain if I can only figure out what it is. If anything, if I figure out the source of the pain I can keep it from happening again. But, what if the pain and emotion itself was there to take me to the source? If I tried to stuff it or deny it I would short circuit the process. Sometimes we think that a spiritual life can lead to a pain free existence. Pain, emotion, joy, anger, contentment- all feelings are spiritual. And, all feelings are human. And we since we literally occupy the space between heaven and earth we are “designed” to be both spiritual and sentient beings.

Can your spirit then too be in pain as much as you body can be? Yes. How often when you are sad does your hand go to your heart? When there is pain present, it is there to get our attention so the healing process can begin.

Here’s how I see it. I begin in contact with my vision, my power to create and God. I set foot on the journey. Along the way there are things that appear as obstacles, opportunities, bumps in the road, smooth sailing and even wisdom. I started out in a “holy” place of clarity, knowing my purpose and mission but in the process of living may have gotten bogged down in the circumstances. I may have been seduced by my own power or other people giving me their power. Or, I may have made a choice- conscious or unconscious to invest my power and the approval for my existence in someone or something only to be disappointed. Eventually, if this has happened, I will come to the discovery that I am not really happy. There exists a set of fears for my “validation” seemingly running things from the unconscious. In short, it seems that I am Involved rather than Evolving. Believe it or not, in all the years I have been working with people this seems to be the “human” way. We get involved in something, become attached to it, give our power away to it and then upon that discovery we begin to EVOLVE out of the situation taking our lessons and moving again into that larger holy place with grand perspective.

The question I propose to you is this. If we KNOW that this is the pattern, is it possible to expand to a larger place maintaining a “mindful” awareness of the process? If so, then we have the process, it does not have us. Although I have yet to achieve this kind of balance on a consistent basis, I truly believe that it is possible and like meditation or working out takes some commitment and discipline. Indeed, there is no way to avoid learning. I also think that there is no way to avoid pain. I do however, and I am repeating myself here, believe, that we are large enough to hold the experiences of our lives- our joy and sorrow, our pain and our ecstasy. It is how we support and nurture ourselves during the process that may determine the overall quality of our lives.

When Stevie Wonder sang “Just go have a talk with God” he wasn’t kidding. I think time needs to be made for that conversation, no matter what is going on in your life, good or bad. Some form or prayer and meditation is as important to your well being as eating and sleeping. It may very well be that this can make the difference between reacting to something and responding (response ability). Disengaging from the “day to day” will allow you to get that spiritual perspective. There are ways we try to disengage. We come home from a hard day and plop in front of the TV, or we eat a lot or smoke or drink. Here again is a chance for mindful awareness. Turn off the TV- get quiet, write in a journal, check in with yourself to see where you are, how you feel, and what you need. Find something that inspires you- a book, music. Parent yourself- drop the judgments out and ask yourself what choices you can make from a powerful centered place.

The People in Your Life

The Holidays are really about the people in our lives. It is the one time of year we stop and evaluate our relationships. This may even be done on an unconscious level. If someone has been kind to us throughout the year we want to give the a special gift that reflects how much we value them. In another case you may think- “well, I really didn’t have much to do with so and so this year but I feel I should give them something”. The gifting process is, believe it or not, an evaluation of your relationships. Even if you can’t afford the lush gift you would like to give- the process is still there. And in a way, it is a process about counting your blessings allowing you to slow the pace of life for a moment and see what you have. Especially at THANKSGIVING. I always make a list around this time of year of things for which I am thankful. That list leads right into thinking about what I have accomplished in the last year. So many times I am focused on what I am not doing and what I haven’t accomplished that I forget to look at what I have and the lessons I have learned.

Barbara Bush in addressing a graduating class at Wellesley said that at the end of your life it won’t be that business deal that didn’t go through or that missed opportunity. It will really be about the people in your life. Relationships are the primary way we learn about ourselves. Our interactions, our posturing, our vulnerability, our cooperation. When you are “shopping” this year take the opportunity to look and see what kind of relationships you have created.

An On-going Coaching Program

Often when it comes to serving my clients, I take my cue from you. When client Joanne Quintana called to say that she wanted me to read her over the phone eleven years ago, that is how phone readings began. Now some 75-80% of my work is done over the phone. Last year Georgina Phillips asked me to begin working with her on a regular basis as “psychic coach” as she called it. She was really ready to do some major work to complete several life patterns and move on. I let her devise the schedule, which turned out to be monthly for a half hour or sometimes an hour. Between meetings she had “homework” to do. Watching her movement and the results these sessions produced led me to believe that Georgina probably wasn’t the only client desiring a structured “coaching” environment. I asked Georgina to write of her experience for this letter.

Last spring, I acknowledged the fact that I was dying-- emotionally, intellectually, creatively and spiritually. I decided that I needed many changes in my life. In the past. I had always acted impulsively with little or no foresight. My attitude whenever I reached this point had always been “Get me out of here, now!” For some reason, this time I said, “Time to stop. No short cuts. I want to do this slowly and completely.” I made a commitment not to “screw it up” as I did before.

I asked Brian to help me make sure that I stayed on track. At the time, I had no idea what I was getting into, but I did know I wanted total honesty on both our parts. I started to see Brian every 2-3 weeks. He provided a very safe environment where I could express myself, push my boarders to their limits and in a sense breakdown in order to break through.

Each session consisted of different exercises all designed to help me get at the core of the situation. For example, in one exercise which I refer to as the “Statement Barrage”, Brian would say “I’m afraid of...” and my response would be “...Losing my mind.” He would continue at a rapid-fire pace so I was unable to think about my answer. When I got emotional, which I did often, I was instructed to breathe and keep on moving forward. After the statement period, there was an evaluation period of what transpired and where I was at the moment. The exchange was exhausting and enlightening.

Brian often gave me “homework” and whether it was a writing exercise, a new meditation technique or a physical exercise, I did it all religiously. This enabled me to continue the work on my own time. It also helped me to focus when I was overwhelmed with anxiety because of the changes that were so rapidly taking place.

One of the most important parts of the sessions was Brian’s constant reminder to not judge myself, my process or my feelings. To actually be neutral. By not giving things value, good or bad, I was able to move through things much more quickly and have a greater understanding of myself and the world around me.

As I come to the end of my transition and begin to take my next step, I am astounded by the progress we’ve made in such a short span of time. Bravo to the both of us for such great work!

Georgina Phillips

I believe the operative word in Georgina’s experience is commitment. She was committed to her growth and decided to be at the source of it rather than at the effect of it. As her “facilitator” I merely “enrolled” in her commitment. If you think a committed coaching is something you would benefit from, call me and we’ll discuss it. It can be done in person or over the phone. The rates for on going work are substantially lower than regular session fees.

Via the Internet Technogeek that I have become you can now contact me through e-mail at peaceful@ix.netcom.com. If you would like, you can also receive the newsletter via e-mail. This means that even when letters go out to other cities, you can receive them. They won’t be quite as fancy but the text will be there. I also hope to have a website in 97 where you will be able to read past letters, writings etc.

Books for You! I’d like to recommend the following books. “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsch (Putnam, 1996) If you Have read “A Course in Miracles” or Jane Roberts materials, or Emannuels books this may be a review but w wonderful review it is. “How to think like a CEO” by D..A. Benton (Warner Books, 1996) Who would think business could be SUCH a spiritual thing. A brilliant book on how to be centered and powerful in your life- even if you’re not planning on being a CEO!

Thanks for reading and HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

BRIAN