Never Say Never

Author : haruka

Pairing : tetsu x hyde

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Author's notes :

The very first fanfic done by Haruka (former haido~~ x^^)...i guess i was being a little akuma when i was writing this fic..gomen ne, tetsu and hyde san!!

 

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"What are you saying? Are you trying to break up with me? " a short man shouted out with a thrust in his voice.

" I'm sorry, but I have no choice. "a taller man replied trying not to look at the other man.

" How can you do this? After all of the things that we had been through together and now you say you don't want to be with me anymore? " holding and shaking the other man's shoulders, the shorter man is desperate for an answer.

" I just can't do it anymore!! All the media and people around me are driving me insane! It's too much pressure being with you, Hyde! You know, we aren't supposed to be together. Not you and me. I just can't take it anymore! " Tetsu answered, an answer Hyde is too afraid to hear.

" What do you mean you can't take it anymore? You think it's any easier for me! You are just being so selfish. Well, if that's the reason why you have to break up with me, I'm telling you, it's just too lame an excuse!! " Hyde is trying to calm himself with a cigarette.

" It's not just an excuse, Hyde. Listening to me, we can't be together because we are two guys! You see, guys aren't supposed to be together. Especially when we are those people who simply just can't get any privacy! Love is not supposed to be like this, love should be simple. " tetsu managed to get those words out of his mouth for a long time already, but he couldn't do it because he didn't want to hurt hyde in anyway. God knows how much he wants to tell hyde that all the things he said aren't true. Still, tetsu has no choice but to say it.

" Simple?!?! Love can never be simple, not with you and me. Unless you are saying that you don't love me anymore. Tetsu, don't you love me anymore? " hyde stared at tetsu with his deep eyes which are already filled with tears. The cigarette doesn't seem to give him any comfort, especially when the idea of tetsu doesn't love him anymore enter his mind.

Tetsu tried to avoid hyde's stare and couldn't answer the harsh question. << how can he ask me this, how can hyde even doubt my love for him! >>

He stands up, walking towards the window. His mind was already determined. Of course tetsu is still deeply in love with hyde, even more in love when he first started his crush on him. But tonight, tetsu has to tell the worst lie that he can ever tell in his entire life.

" I.....yes, I don't love you anymore......"

Follow by a long moment of silence, tetsu walks towards hyde.

" Don't you think it's easier for both you and me." That was the best words that were able to come out of tetsu's mouth.

" You big liar. " hyde said with a hurting tone in his voice. Cuddling in the sofa, hyde looks totally helpless.

Tetsu just wants to hold hyde in his arms, kiss all of his tears away and tell him that everything are gonna be alright. But he can't. If he does, all of the attempts would be useless.

Tetsu trys not to look at hyde, the person that he loves the most in his entire life. He has to get away, anywhere but here because he doesn't want to see hyde crying or anything. So he quickly grabs his coat.

" I have to go now....." without waiting for a reply, he walks out of the door and disappears in hyde's sight.

 

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- Tokyo is pouring rain right now. -

After walking out of hyde's apartment, all parts of tetsu's body crashed down. He can't imagine what hyde would be doing at this moment. He had done such a terrible thing, telling his lover the worst lie. Tetsu feels so miserable.

<< I'm selfish.... .>> he thought.

With no umbrella with him, tetsu let the rain pour on him. although he has his car, but he just doesn't feel like driving right now. So he started walking.

To where? he doesn't know.

The night is quiet except for the sound of the rain.

<< Singin' in the Rain... >> tetsu thought.

A million different thoughts rush into his brain right now.

<< how can I ever tell ken and yukkie for what I had done to hyde..... >>....... Tetsu feels so annoyed by himself.

He wants things to be normal and simple. That's what he told hyde, he wants a simple life. His selfish thought makes tetsu really hates himself. But after a long period of hiding and lying to other people, tetsu felt so tired. He can't keep a relationship with anyone when he feels so pressured. Although tetsu still loves hyde, but trying to ignore his feeling, he thinks that it will go away one day.

 

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Hyde is still sitting in the sofa after tetsu had left.

For how long? he doesn't know.

The cigarette in his hand had already burnt out but hyde feels too miserable to get rid of it. He is too miserable to do anything, even to cry. The tears on his delicate face had already dried and he has no more tears. It is a weird feeling but hyde didn't try to stop tetsu walking away from him.

<< Why ?? >> hyde thought.

There are too many questions that needed to be answered but his mind is too numb to even think for any possibility. He closed his eyes, forcing himself to fall asleep. But the more he tries, the more sober he feels.

<< tetsu doesn't love me anymore!?!?!>> this thought is scaring him.

Without his love, how can hyde carry on? Tetsu has always be the one for him, no matter how the stupid media was trying to hook hyde on with some stupid girls. Hyde can still remember the first time that tetsu told him that he likes him. It all seems that it just happened yesterday, yet so far away from him.

All the memories rush into hyde's mind. The sweet moments that would still make hyde smiles.

<< does he still remember ......... >>

 

 

--------------- to be continue ---------------