On Friday night last week I received a sms from a schoolmate asking me about Dr Mahathir's resignation just a few minutes after his announcement at PWTC. I believed he  was also watching the TV like me. He needed confirmation - may be becuase it was unexpected or he did not believe it. Immediatelly I replied "yes" before another announcement came back with the news that Dr Mahathir's withdrawal of his intended resignation. Honestly, I don't believe that Dr Mahathir will eat back his own words in front of thousands of UMNO delegates and millions of Malaysians.

Over the weekend, I met a few of my friends. Some said it was only a drama, some believe it, some don't believe anything until it really happens. When I heard that Dr Mahathir left to Naples,Italy for a holiday with a government jet, then I made up my mind that he will continue for a few months and will definitely resigns because he already said so. Otherwise ,where is his credibility? (This view was written on my online diary on 24/06/2002 at http://www.livejournal.com/users/berisman ).It is very unfair for some UMNO members to insist him to stay for he is already 77 years old and he needs his own private time and space. I do respect that. As an UMNO member myself since I was 20 years old , I believe every leader has to do his job during his time and the next leader has to take over and continue with the next phase of leadership. Generally,good leaders know when to retire to enable the next leader to take over.The task of nation building is not one man's job; it is the job of every citizens guided by their national leaders from time to time. Datuk Seri Abdullah Badawi needs not  create another vision;the Vision 2020 is more than adequate. I would be very happy to live and see the successful completion that vison in the year 2020,insyaAllah.

From my personal experience , I am already tired of doing business since 1989. That is only 13 years ago. In Dr Mahathir's case, it is almost 21 years. Let's give him a break and honestly I have indicated to my fellow director to take over my business leadership in a few months time when I reach 50! Dr Mahathir's holiday in Naples reminds me to visit St Marks Square in Venice, Italy for a cup of real Italian cappucino with accompanying music there. The  last time I was there was in 1987.

Dr Mahathir is a Malaysian leader  for the last 21 years. Everyone has his or her own judgement of his leadership. We all know what he had done, have not done or could have done in our own versions. I may have my own opinion on Dr Mahathir's leadership but I pefer not to make judgement. I think history is a better judge for that. Most of us prefer to ask what others could do for us, but most of the time we failed to ask ourselves. As Malaysians, we also need to ask ourselves what we have done as followers (citizens) at family level,community level,departmental level,organisational level as well as national level? What have we done to contribute to others as well as to the nation  and our family? At the same time ,we are also leaders in our own way. As a leader ,we need to know something, to do something and to be something. What do you know,? What do you do? And what are you? Honestly, it is not easy to be a leader. That is why I would rather be a follower and yet remain independent to lead my own life...( that is being a follower and a leader at the same time-another paradox that I have to live with.If you wish to know more on how to live with many paradoxes of life,please read a book by Charles Handy entitled The Empty Raincoat).

A few days preceeding the UMNO Annual Delegates conference last week, I read his interview which Dr Mahathir  admitted that he had failed to change the Malays. At the UMNO conference, he apologised that he got to tell/remind the Malays what everybody already knew  about the Malays. As a student on leadership and management, I will be going to bookshops to buy books on what Dr Mahathir has written and compared that what he has done and what we had achieved so far.The answer I will be looking for is the reasons for Dr Mahathir's admission that he had failed to change the Malays or the failures of the Malays to change themselves.

On personal note,as a Malay , I just wondered what I have done to change myself. How about you??