A full life..or A fool's life?

Problematic teenagers are really 'hell' to parents.It is the age of growing pains
for them as well as for some parents.Thank God,I am blessed with three kids(all boys), age  ranging from 18+ to 10+ years old with little problems- so far.All of them are staying with me now and I see,talk and live with them everyday, except when I am out-stations/overseas.Looking at their ages,they will leave us in five to ten years from now.They are my kids, but by then,they don't belong to me anymore.They belong to themselves and their wives and their own kids.By that time,insyaAllah, my wife and me will be grandparents.This will remind me the day when my wife and me left our  parent's house  some 23 years ago.In not too distant future, it will be my  turn :-((.The cycle goes on...
 

Now,it is also the time for most parents at my age(40++) are at the top of their carriers/business ventures.They are always busy with meetings,functions, projects,trips away from home etc,etc.Most of them do not have adequate quality time with kids,especially during their kids  formative years.I pray to Allah  that I would not be like those who joined the rat race and neglected  their family life.If they ever win the rat race,they will still remain a rat!!The Winner- Big Fat Rat who does not even know their own  kids and family members.I happen to know personally two guys who could not afford time to visit their  dying relative. What a "successful ' life...God forbids.
 

I believe the next  10 years of my life is very important to my kids,wife and me.We should live as a happy family EVERYDAY of the rest of our life.There is NOT a DAY to waste.It is also my opportunity to teach them religous obligations and good values of  family life and at  the same time for my wife and me to enjoy living with our kids before they are on their own.From my observation,most parents missed this opportunity.Some don't even think about it.It is not that they wanted to miss,but they got carried away and lost their  sense of this valuable time.They got lost in the traffic looking for bigger material wealth.However,I don't blame some of  them-sometimes it is a matter of survival.By the time they retired and have the time and money to enjoy,most of their kids are gone.They are only left by themselves-older,lonelier and sometimes sick! When the 'kids' then start building own their carriers,they often forget to care for their parents. Now,it is the parents turn to reap the harvest they have sown  earlier...

Last month,I have the opportunity to talk to someone who had just retired.It is
my habit to make friends and discuss issues with someone who is at least five years older than me.That way,I can learn from them beforehand and I should avoid mistakes they have done earlier.By thinking I am ten years older than my real age,I will have the time to do what I should have done before I actually comes to that age.Our conversation started on what we are going to do with the rest of our life.The distance to travel  is going to be shorter than we have travelled.He confided to me that he had not lived life to the full.Honestly,I don't know what he meant by that,but I feel that he had missed something personally.I believed he had a good successful professional carrier and family life.What I think that were missing were his personal life  and social life.?I don't think anyone will achieve 100% full life,but I would  be happy with 80% of it.The question that bugged me (even at my age) was that what is a full life?That is what we all must find out first,otherwise how would we know whether we live X% of a full life.

As I grow older,the time seems to be moving faster than my watch.Another Ramadhan had just passed by(8/1/2000);soon another one will come by 27th Nov.,2000.Year in and year out-I just wonder what I have done with my life?Did I live  a full life so far?More questions than answers.Honestly,everyone will have their own answers-most likely will be different from yours and mine.

Basically,our life is made of our family,our work and society we live in.I addition to that,we have our own personal and spiritual life.Most often neglected and/or deferred are our personal/spiritual life.By the time we realised that we missed something or we should have done something,it is too late.We all must define and set goals,otherwise we are just adding years to our life every year.It should be we are adding  life to our years,every year!

In the real world,we must make our own life and at the same time we must make  our own living.Sometimes,the two did not match with one another.The only way the two parts can be intergarted is to make a living out of something we enjoy doing.For this detailed discussion,please visit a website by Dr. Mark Albion.

The other aspect I am working on(before it is too late) is to lead a simple life.One of the principles of Simple Life is just having what I  really need,and enrich them with what really matters to me and my family.

In the final analysis,we have only ONE life,there is NO second chance.So,let's make the best of it-for here and the hereafter.It is our choice-to live a FULL life or a FOOL's life?
 

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