where were you when...
double deaths in my mother's house:5th Dec.,1980

"Adib,let's bring your father back home",said Pak Cik Noor.As the eldest son,I have to make THE DECISION.Never before I have to make this kind of decision.As a young man of 29 years old,it was much easier to make engineering decision at PWD Pasir Mas,Kelantan where I work.However,this is  a matter of life and death for my father.He was in the state of coma after failing to recover from a prostate surgical operation.After consultation with my elders,all of them agreed that it is time to bring my father home after he failed to response to medication. To me,it meant that he will die soon.

As a muslim,I submit to the will of Allah,but what angered me most was that the doctor didnot delivered what was promised to me prior to my father's consent to undergo surgery. From this experience I will always double check even if the opinion comes from the expert or specialist.The medical specialist can be wrong.

Prior to surgery,I asked the physician whether my father can go through the operation because he has a weak heart and diabetes.I was afraid that the surgical cuts may not be cured due to high sugar blood content. However, the specialist doctor assured me that she can bring down the sugar contents.What actually happened was that she had failed to control the sugar contents.The prostate operation was successful,but post surgical complication had led to the death of my father.What ever that means.

The bottom line is:I lost my father.The question haunted me is:Would my father  agreed to the operation if he knew that his diabetic conditions do not allow him to undergo prostate removal operation?I don't know the answer until to-day.If it were to happen in USA,the lawyers would have a field day suing the government doctors.

Back in my mother's house is my granfather was lying ill for some time due to old age.After I brought my father home,my grandpa condition got worse.
I didnot know how my mother feels-in one room,she had a dying husband and in another room of the same house,she had gravely ill father.Until to-day,after 16 years had passed,I dared not ask for fear she may cry out of sadness.I hope she has recovered by now.

After two days back home,there was no improvement.On Thurday's night(malam Jumaat),my grandpa passed away at 12.30am and followed by my father at 6:00am.To the local folks,it was quite a unique event,for two people to die almost together in the same house.I lost my father and grandfather,but my mother lost her husband and her father within 6 hours in her own house!Only Allah knows how she felt on that day.The emotional shock is beyond my comprehension.

It is muslims belief that to die on Friday is a blessing from Allah.Thursday's night is the Friday's night of the Islamic calendar.During the burial at the cemetery,my wife's uncle Ustaz Yusuf Zaki reminded me to say the following prayers:

Ya Allah ya Tuhanku,ampunlah ayahku dan kasihlah beliau sebagaimana beliau mengasihi daku dan tempatkan rohnya di makam yang sesuai dengan amalannya ,Amin.

I said the prayers several times after personally laid him to rest- in full tears.Both of them were buried side by side,leaving a space  just enough for one more person.Only later that I knew the reason for this space.It was instructed by my mother.That empty space is "booked" by her.She also reminded me last month that when she dies,she wanted to be buried between her father's grave and my father's grave.I did not say anything, just noded my head.


For the record,both men started an Islamic religous school in1946.To-day,the school is among the best in Kelantan with 1800 students.My father was the headmaster and my grandpa was the kampung Imam.May Allah bless their souls.