Hello, and welcome to the Humor section of 212 Degrees--Boiling Point, Issue 11! This section is still pretty new, so please let me know what you guys and gals think of it, k? Send me feedback!
I started college just a few weeks ago and one of the classes I'm taking is called "Study Skills for College Success"... We spent the first two weeks working on "self-analysis". You know, taking all those little personality tests and learning style tests and other "self-analyzing" quizzes that take up a bunch of time but end up telling you exactly what you already know about yourself... Yep, those are the ones! (Hey, they can be fun too!!) Anyway, as I filled out these different tests, I came across some interesting or slightly humorous questions. So I thought I'd share some of them here with you all...:)
(Note: Just because I thought some of these were funny doesn't mean I thought they were irrelevant. Some of these I actually did score highly on...after I laughed about them, that is!)
Some Self-Analysis Questions:
***You are uncomfortable in situations in which attention is centered upon yourself. --Okay, I gather that this question is NOT referring to those times when you've gotten yourself into trouble or messed up in some way and you wish you could just disappear from the scene right then and there...
***You feel confident and calm during an exam. --Is there anyone at all out there who can relate to this?? Because I sure can't!!!
***You have adequate time each day to accomplish what you plan. --Ummm...isn't this just a bit unrealistic? Maybe I just plan too much... Yeah, that must be it....:)
***You adapt your test-taking strategy to the kind of test you're taking. --Strategy?? Did I miss something...Oh, maybe that's how some people manage to stay confident and calm during exams... My "strategy" pretty much stays the same--Answer the questions, give the required information, turn in the test paper, and hope for the best!
***When you're in class, you focus you attention. --Sure, I focus my attention during every single class... Oh! You mean focus my attention on what the teacher is saying?? Ohhhhhh...well, why didn't ya say so!
***You are able to predict test questions. --Predict, eh? Yeah, I'm sure...
***You select a reading strategy to fit the type of material you're reading. --There's that talk about strategies again... Don't worry, I think I know what they mean this time. When reading a boring and extremely dry philosophy textbook (yeah, this one is taken from my own personal experience this semester...), use the "skim" and "scan" strategy... When reading your notes from a lecture, use the "decode" and "detect" strategy... When reading the sixty pages of a text fifteen minutes before class is supposed to start, use the "speed read" strategy...
***You have flashes of insight, and solutions to problems appear to you at unusual times. --Let me guess, this one goes along with that predicting test questions one...random answers just pop into your head and you know they'll appear on the next test... Why don't these types of things ever happen to me??
***You can recall information when you're under pressure. --Reminds me of those scenes in movies where the person is tied to a chair and being tortured. When the person catches glimpse of the electric shock tools to be used, he "suddenly" remembers the information that the other guys are looking for. Oh yeah...just took a little bit of pressure to jog that ol' memory. Now I remember...
***You approach courses in mathematics and science with confidence. --That question in itself is a joke! Sorry if I offended anyone out there who might actually like *math*... I admire those of you who can stand these subjects, really! For the rest of you who share my feelings towards *math*...we're now taking applicants for new members into our world-wide S.A.M. (Students Against Math) club. See me for more details on that...
Some questions that didn't quite make it on the tests:
***You tend to be a bit indecisive when it comes to making choices. --Note: If you can't decide if this fits you or not, it probably does!
***You find yourself dreading history assignments, math assignments, english assignments, science assignments, government assignments, etc. etc. But hey, at least you enjoy the art and music part of school. --This one is in honor of my sister who claims this as her motto. *L*
***You believe that sleeping in class is your specific learning style...a sort of gleaning subconsciously what you know you won't grasp while awake and alert!
***You firmly believe in reading your textbooks right before going to bed...as a cure for insomnia.
***Whenever confronted with a scholastic task, your eyes start watering, you start sneezing, and your hands swell to a point where you can't write...in other words, you're allergic to anything schoolwork related.
Note: The first question I used was taken from a paper about Dr. John Holland's Six Personality Types. All the other questions, except the ones that fell in the "didn't quite make it on the tests" list, were taken from Becoming A Master Student by Dave Ellis. And the ones that didn't make it on the tests were my very own ingenious questions! *takes a bow*...Well, actually I had some help from my sister on those ones too...*she takes a bow also*...:)
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