these items appear in order of submissions.
From
Valkryie
SoHo/Coffeehouse/6404
When I die, i want to go painlessly, in my sleep, like Grandpa;
not screaming and carrying on the like other passengers in the car.
Submitted by Nullmodem
SoHo/Cafe/7179
A local business was looking for office help.
They put a sign in the window, stating the following: "HELP WANTED.
Must be able to
type, must be good with a computer and must be bilingual.
We
are an Equal Opportunity Employer."
A short time afterwards, a dog trotted up to the window,
saw the
sign and went inside.
He looked at the receptionist and wagged
his tail,
then walked over to the sign, looked at it and whined.
Getting the idea, the receptionist got the office manager.
The office
manager looked at the dog and was surprised,
to say the least.
However, the dog looked determined,
so he lead him into the office.
Inside, the dog jumped up on the chair and stared at the manager.
The manager said "I can't hire you. The sign says
you have to be
able to type." The dog jumped down,
went to the typewriter and
proceeded to type out a perfect letter.
He took out the page and
trotted over to the manager
and gave it to him, then jumped back
on the chair.
The manager was stunned, but then told the dog
"the sign says
you have to be good with a computer."
The dog jumped down
again and went to the computer.
The dog proceeded to enter and
execute a perfect program,
that worked flawlessly the first time.
By this time the manager was totally dumb-founded!
He looked at
the dog and said
"I realize that you are a very intelligent dog and
have some interesting abilities.
However, I *still* can't give you the
job."
The dog jumped down and went to a copy of the sign and put his
paw
on the sentences that told about being an Equal Opportunity
Employer.
The manager said "yes, but the sign *also* says that
you have to be bilingual."
The dog looked at the manager calmly and said, "Meow!"
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send it to Valkryie@iname.com with your name, and your url.
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