"People who cannot find time for recreation are obliged sooner or later to find time for illness."
-- John Wanamaker
01/12/00 Licenced to Kill
Monica lost her driver's licence.
I'm not sure when....seems like forever. I don't know how. Maybe she took it out so "the check-out lady" at the grocery store could verify her identity. Maybe it fell out while she was fumbling for her debit card. Regardless of how it happened, the fact remained... Monica didn't have her driver's licence.

Who would think that a stupid little laminated piece of paper would be such a problem.
Granted, I do most of the driving, so that's only part of the issue. It's all of the other things you need photo ID for in this life.

Things like:
Writing and Cashing Checks
Even though most of her fears of check writing can be addressed by the use of the debit card, and that little machine that verifies your check at the checkstand, Monica still always made me write the check at all times just to avoid being being put on the spot.

Renting Movies
Just to get a membership at Blockbuster you have to prove that you are who you seem to be.

Getting into the Nike Employee Store
May not sound too important, but you do need to present "valid photo I.D." to be let through the "Fort Knox" like secuity and into the land of wholesale shoes. On more than one ocassion Monica has attempted to use an expired COSTCO card as proof of identity. Usually the 'girl behind the desk' would say, "This ain't I.D., this is a COSTCO card."
Monica would have to explain in embarassed, hushed tones that it did have her photo so it should be valid. The photo on a COSTCO membership card (if you have never seen one), looks remarkably like they stuck your head in a photocopier, then reduced the image to the size of a postage stamp, before printing it onto the plastic card with an old 'piece of crap' dot matrix printer. The fuzzy image looks more like the 'Shroud of Turin' than Monica.

Getting into a courtroom.
This is the piece of necesity that finally got Monica into the DMV after months of saying, "I gotta go get my licence replaced one of these days." Tommorow we have a court appearance to finalize the bancruptcy we have been persuing.
Monica went into the DMV and told them that she had misplaced her driver's licence a few months back. The helpful state employee informed Monica that it must have been a little more than "a few months"...her misplaced card had expired over three years ago.
And she says I procrastinate.

Licensed to Ill.

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