Aylith moved her brush across the wooden box slowly, her
hands taking painstaking care to make the strokes perfect. The brush
seemed to be a window to her soul as it's soft hairs gently stroked the
smooth surface of the wood, as the soft colour of the box became buried
beneath the deep violet coat of paint, the smell of the wood mixing
with the smell of the paint. The smell intoxicated Aylith, she could
almost close her eyes and still hold her hand steady. How lovely the
smell was. Her eyes gently caressed the box she held lovingly in her
hand as she continued to paint. Yet the eyes themselves seemed empty,
how very empty indeed. But her work held such life, the colours
vividly leaping from the box as she set it down, cleaning her brush in
the water, marvelling in the colour, the smell, the true beauty of her
work.
Aylith smiled to herself as she worked the water from the brush
between her fingers, sliding the brush back into it's case. She stared
at the box a moment, wishing she could speed the drying process of the
paint. She wished she could return to her work of beauty and peace,
yet her thoughts would not bring the paint to dry any faster.
She stood, rising from the cushion she had set upon the floor to
sit on. To any looking upon her at that moment she would have appeared
a goddess. Her long brunette hair hung in soft wisps around her face,
the hairs having fallen from the tightly braided coil of hair pinned
atop her head. She wiped her hands off on a small towel, her deep
brown eyes, the colour of the earth itself watched intently as she
wiped gently to remove the stains of paint that soiled her hands.
Finally she pulled the oversized black t-shirt up over her head,
glancing carefully at the spatters of paint that graced it's surface.
The spatters seeming to be a work of art themselves as she tossed it
toward her hamper. Her body held the fine grace of a woman, yet it was
youthful as she shivered in the slight chill of the room. She reached
down to a dresser drawer, and discovered it empty save for a few pairs
of socks, her pajamas and a few intimate items.
"Great, I forgot the laundry in the living room again." she
muttered slightly under her breath. Some of the peace she felt from
the painting disappearing a bit as she opened her bedroom door and
strolled out into the hallway of the small house, unpinning the coils
of her hair until it tumbled out across her shoulder in a graceful
braid that near touched her waist.
Aylith placed the pins in her jeans pocket, glancing at spatters
of paint on them as well, but decided that it added character to her
jeans and didn't bother to really entertain the idea of changing them
as well. She shrugged inwardly and continued to walk down the hall,
not paying much attention to the posters on the white washed wall.
They were her paintings, she saw them everyday and everyday she went
on, not paying much attention to them at all. She finally reached the
living room, spying her laundry where she had left it, sitting upon the
couch. She reached over and pulled a soft cotton shirt over her head,
smoothing it out against her body gently.
"Um..." A gentle, yet deep voice whispered quietly from behind her
Aylith leaped at the whisper which could easily have been a scream
to her ears which had grown so used to the complete silence.
She turned around, her brown eyes widened and filled with fear, not
knowing whom she would regard as she turned.
She found herself staring at a man of similar age, with thick wavy
blond hair and blue eyes. Perhaps under other circumstances Aylith
would have found him quite handsome. Yet he was a stranger, in her
home and at that moment he only seemed to pose a threat.
"What the hell are you doing in my house?" she asked in what
should have been a raised voice but revealed her fear as it passed by
her lips in a soft whisper.
"I'm a friend of Terra's, I thought maybe I'd find her here and
the door was open. My name is Murray."
Aylith silently cursed herself for leaving the door open and then
muttered slightly to herself about Terra and her friends always coming
and going, before collecting herself.
"Well, I guess you got quite the show then" she said, folding her
arms across her chest self consciously. "But Terra won't get home
until around 11 tonight, she's working the later shift. I'm Aylith,
I'm sure you've heard nothing about me, but that's to be expected. Do
you want me to take a message for Terra before you leave?"
Aylith walked towards the door, hoping the man would follow and
take her que and leave. Today was her day to be alone. She didn't
have any classes, she didn't have to work, there was only her and her
painting. Nothing was going to stop her from enjoying this day of
peace and loneliness.
But alas, he didn't leave. He only continued to speak to her, his
icy blue eyes staring into her eyes intently until she was forced to
turn her gaze to the floor to avoid the stare.
"I feel really bad about walking in here and stuff, really I do.
Let me take you out for supper, well it's 8 pm, you've probably already
eaten haven't you? Well then let me take you out for dessert or
something and I can meet Terra after she's done her shift." He said,
babbling on, half to himself, half to Aylith
"Your right, I have eaten" She said, ignoring the grumbling in her
stomach which gave away her lie. "But I don't eat dessert. I guess
you'll have to go and wait for Terra alone. That's too bad, really it
is, maybe some other time" She smiled sweetly and opened the door,
beckoning him out.
"Come on, I really want to do something for you after walking in
on you so rudely like that. Coffee then?"
"I don't drink coffee."
"Tea?"
"Not that either"
"Juice? Beer? Water??? Good Lord woman what do you drink?"
"Nothing, good night. Really it's fine, no offense taken over
the little incident, really. Please, I think it's time for you to go"
Murray sighed and looked at her as he spoke
"Big date tonight then huh? You must be waiting for someone. A
woman as pretty as you sure wouldn't be staying home on a friday night
all alone. Guess I should have known. Well, um I guess I should go
then, I know how it is. Just in case you and your date get bored I'll
be down at the club Terra works at, you know maybe we could all get
together or something hey?"
"Yeah, sure. Sounds great. I guess I should, um, go get ready
now. I'll see you around i'm sure."
"Guess so. See you around then" And with that Murray left.
Aylith shut the door soundly behind him.
"Finally" she whispered to herself.
What a lie it had been, the date, the supper. Simple excuses that
had gotten her out of so many similar situations. Why would anyone in
their right minds seek large groups of other people when they weren't
forced to? Would they not embrace the chance to be alone as well? Yet
it seemed to Aylith as though many of them did not.
She leaned with her back to the door a moment, recovering from her
slight fright as she stared into the kitchen.
The kitchen that Aylith and Terra shared was kept miraculously
clean, painted in a light shade of blue. Aylith smiled to herself as
she remembered the day she had painted it. She had just recently
aquired the house, it was still late when she was painting, as dark
outside as it was at that moment. She glanced up at the graceful
feathering of white brush strokes that bordered the ceiling of the
room, allowing her gaze to move out across the room, passing by the
small rectangular table, it's surface oh so smooth, shining so brightly
you could almost see your reflection in it. The stove stood proud and
tall nearby, keeping a silent watch across the room. Beside it, the
fridge, graced with tiny works of art, small painted magnets as well as
the cheap plastic magnets with funny sayings that Terra insisted on.
The peaceful room soon calmed her nerves and she moved away from the
door, walking through the living room again and out down the hallway
back to her bedroom where the small wooden box sat, the paint having
dried in the time she had spent quibbling with the fellow who waltzed
into her home.
Aylith looked down at the little violet coloured box, sitting out
amongst other small painted boxes, graced with images of delicate
ballerinas, flowers, graceful swirls and intertwining leaves, each box
held a new delight to the eye. Pieces of paper were scattered across
the floor near the boxes showing peaceful renditions of lovely
sceneries, a peaceful lake amongst the vast giants of mountains, a
tranquil clearing among a forest. She smiled to herself, looking at
the fragments of her soul that lay before her, the only peace and love
she felt in her life.
Aylith sat down on her cushion and picked up the box, forgetting
why she had gotten up earlier and changed her shirt as she looked at
it, running her fingertips across the lid. She picked up her brush and
dipped it into a pale pink colour and began to work it across the lid.
The picture developed ever so slowly as she watched the brush become an
extension of her soul, a small, delicate rose appearing in the soft
petals created by the brush. A delighted look took to her face as she
rinsed her brush, dipping it in green, working with more intensity and
passion than her eyes would ever reveal. At that moment the sky could
have fallen and Aylith would have never known it, she was too involved
in her world of beauty.
As she finished her painting and wiped her hands clean she looked
at the clock. Two hours had passed since her strange visitor had
arrived and Terra would be back in an hour, no time for her to begin
another project. She stood up from the floor and yawned to herself as
she wandered to her kitchen, pulling half of a vegetarian sandwich she
had made earlier from one of the shelves. She bit into it, the hunger
in her stomach subsiding as she walked over to a radio that sat atop
the refrigerator and flicked it on. She nearly chocked as the Jewel's
soft voice echoed across the room, singing the sweet chorus of "You
Were Meant For Me". She sighed and shut it off. Was there no escape
from this world that was so obsessed with love? Was there no way to
avoid this pain that the radio, the television kept throwing at her?
She set down the sandwich, leaving it on the counter as she no longer
had any appetite for it. She grabbed a light jacket and slipped
outside, locking the door behind her as the night air nipped at her
cheeks, making them flush a gentle shade of pink, the same colour of
the soft rose petals as she walked out into the cold. She slid her
arms into the warm jacket and buttoned it up to her neck, sticking her
hands in the pockets.
Aylith wasn't quite sure where she was going, the noises of the
city echoed around her ears but it was if they weren't really there.
She just needed to get away from the assaults of the radio and
television, to breathe the cool night air that matched the temperature
of her heart before she made the attempt to sleep that night. The
thought of sleep made her tremble slightly as she walked. For so many
nights the nightmares had assaulted her. She was unable to remember
them, but she remembered how afraid they made her, how she would sit up
in the night, terrified of what she had seen in her subconscious. But
had the dreams not always troubled her? She couldn't remember for
sure. It seemed that these days the only thing that could take her
away was her painting, at least there she had the peace and beauty that
she never was able to see in the real world. And of course her
paintings never screamed words of love to her, simply peace, and
escape. She heard enough talk of love without seeing it through her
paintings.
She walked, deep in thought for a long time, her thick braid
bouncing upon her back. Never once did she fear the dangers of the
night. For surely what would anyone want with her? Her feet thumped
softly against the pavement of the sidewalk, the cars on the street
rushing about around her. It seemed as if the traffic never stopped.
She passed by dark boutiques and bowling alleys, restaurants and
daycares. The streets now only lit by the lights from the clubs, the
bars and the disgusting halls where women willingly exposed themselves
for the lust and the money of the even more filthy men that were
patrons of such buildings. She found herself standing outside the club
where Terra worked, it had only been a twenty minute walk yet she was
so deep in thought that it felt like hours. "Evening's Paradise" the
sign read in bright neon letters. She sighed to herself and walked
inside, wondering how her room mate could work in such a loud
environment.
Aylith stood in the doorway, her cheeks were flushed from the cold
air, her trim jacket hugged snuggly to her as she walked in a few
steps, looking for an empty table to seat herself at.
"Aylith?" A male voice called
Aylith turned around towards the voice, her thick braid flopping
down to lay across her shoulder as her head turned, her eyes regarding
the man she had seen earlier, Murray. She sighed softly at being
recognized and nodded.
"Yeah, it's me," she replied
"Wow, date's over this early huh?"
"You could say that." she replied coldly.
The man looked at her appreciatively for a moment and nodded.
"Well, I'm glad you came anyhow. Why don't you join me at my
table and let me buy you a drink?" he asked
"I don't know, I really wasn't planning on staying very long
and..." she muttered
"Oh come on now." Murray interrupted, cutting her off. "Just half
an hour or so until Terra gets off work. I'm not that bad am I?"
Murray smiled and motioned towards the table.
"Oh alright" Aylith replied grudgingly and followed him over to a
table, sitting down across from him.
The music blared about them, although their table lay farther away
from the others in a more quiet area of the club. The bar was brightly
lit as nightly patrons draped themselves out across the counter with
their drunken pick up lines and bad attempts at flirtation. Couples
danced clumsily on the dance floor, while others sat quietly talking,
or eating at the many tables in the room.
"And for you Ms.?" A voice echoed beside her as she broke her
entrancement with the noises of the room
"Ummm..." she mumbled. "Just a cola please"
The waiter nodded and disappeared as she turned her attention to
Murray who was already sipping what appeared to be an alcoholic drink
from a large glass.
"So," Murray began."Do you work here too then? I haven't seen you
around here before."
"No" she replied, "I work at a small crafting supplies store a
block from here. I take night classes sometimes as well. What about
you?"
"Well I'm a Doctor," he looked up at her, looking for the usual
looks of delight or approval the woman often give, but was met by only
a simple nod. "I work at a small hospital for children with terminal
illnesses."
"Sad work"
"You bet it is, but it's one of the best jobs in the world. You
fall in love with those kids, you really do. It's so great to get to
give them what they want most in the world."
"What do you mean?" Aylith asked with curiosity
"Well we work to give them their 'last wish'. Some of them want
to go to disney land, some of them want to met a celebrity. Others
want more simple things, like to have a poem written with their name in
it, or like a really beautiful picture to look at all the time in their
room, so they always have something beautiful to look at."
"I paint..." Aylith mumbled half to herself, her voice barely
audible.
"What was that?"
"I just said that I paint, pictures and jewelry boxes and
things...nothing much really. They aren't very good."
"I doubt that, people always say their art work isn't very good.
I'm sure it's beautiful. Say, did you do those paintings in your
hallway?" he asked curiously, staring at her with admiration in his
bright blue eyes.
"How many times have you been in my house???"Aylith asked with a
bit of shock
They both laughed a bit before Aylith looked back up at him,
smiling a bit
"Yeah, I did those" she said softly
Murray returned the smile brightly as he spoke. "I don't suppose
I could convince you to bring a few of those to the hospital some day?
It'd really mean a lot to some of those kids."
Aylith smiled again "I think I could do something like that.
Would tomorrow be alright to come by?"
Murray nodded happily "Of course, just let me write down the
address ok?"
Murray pulled a small pad of paper and a pen from his jacket
pocket and scribbled down the address, smiling at her as he pushed it
across the table towards her.
Aylith picked up the paper and folded it carefully as the waiter
walked over to their table and set her cola down beside her. She
tucked the paper carefully into her pocket and nodded.
"I'll be there." she said with a slight smile, taking a sip of the
cola from the glass.
"Do you suppose I could take you out to supper sometime or
something? I'd like to get to know you a bit better." he asked quietly
"Afraid not"
"Why not? Oh, are you worried about Terra? Because if that's
what it is I assure that we are only friends. We dated a few times and
it didn't work out. We decided it was best to just remain friends."
"No that's not it" she replied quietly
"Oh? You're seeing someone then?" he asked, looking a bit
disappointed
"No, not that either"
"Well then what is it? I'm single, you're single, no problem
right? Come on, it's just a little supper, or lunch even, I could take
you out tomorrow after you drop off those paintings"
"You're really pushy aren't you?" Aylith replied a soft smile upon
her lips
"Sorry, I'm really not trying to be. You're just a really
interesting woman, quite attractive as well."
"Glad you think so" she said, her voice completely uninterested.
"Ouch, ok that hurt, I get the hint. I'll back off. Friends
then? Friendly mid afternoon coffee break tomorrow?" He asked,
looking hopefully at her.
"No, afraid not. But I'm sure I'll see you around sometime." she
replied, her voice still not showing any signs of emotion
Murray sighed softly, looking up at her again.
"Just one more thing, and then I swear I'll drop the subject, Do
you have some reason for not wanting to go out with me? Am I that
unattractive or something?" he asked quietly
Aylith chuckled softly before she began to spoke, her voice soft,
revealing a slight tone of sadness to it that became unrecognizable as
it mixed with the noises of the club, "No, no that's not it...it's just
that I...."
Her words were cut off as Terra skipped over to the table, she was
dressed in a short black skirt with a tight white shirt. Her medium
length blonde hair hung in bouncy curls around her face. Her blue eyes
sparkled with joy and delight as she giggled a little, sitting down on
Murray's lap
"See ya met my roomie hey babe? What were you two discussing so
seriously?" she asked with her youthful, bright voice
"Oh nothing," Aylith replied, taking another sip of her soda
before standing up. "I was just going to leave, that's all."
"Oh, Okay, well don't wait up for me tonight, I'm going to be busy
right Mur?" Terra said with a little giggle, kissing Murray on the
cheek.
"Actually, " Murray said, pausing slightly to lift Terra off of
his lap and set her down on a chair before standing up himself. "I was
planning on leaving as well, shall I walk you back to your home Aylith?
My place isn't far from there."
Terra pouted, speaking before Aylith had a chance to answer. "Ok,
well I guess I'll go find Dan or someone else then. You two have fun,
and don't do anything I wouldn't do" She grinned and winked at them
before hopping up out of the chair and disappearing into the throng of
people that had increased as the time had passed.
Murray looked at Aylith, the question still on his face.
"Alright I guess." she replied as she lead the way out of the busy
club.
The noise of the club disappeared behind them as they walked, the
cold night bit at Aylith once more, yet she seemed not to notice it
anymore than she noticed the slight glances Murray was giving her. She
had no place in her life for such trivialities. All that mattered was
to keep living and her painting. There was nothing else to live for
than for those few moments of peace and tranquility she felt in the
silence as she painted.
"You know, I'm sorry about that thing with Terra" he said softly,
looking at her as his breath flooded out into a soft white cloud of
mist around his lips.
"It's alright, she's like that with everyone." Aylith said smiling
politely.
"I know, that's one of the reasons it wouldn't work for us. I
would rather have someone I could love and care about and I would know
that she felt the same way about me."
Aylith's heart contorted in pain, although her face remained
emotionless at the mention of the word "love". Was she not safe from
such a painful emotion even here, in the cold evening streets? Aylith
shrugged slightly in answer, desperately praying that she would reach
her home soon.
"I wouldn't know" she murmured softly.
"What do you mean? You're an attractive woman, surely you've been
involved in some romance of some sort. You must know what you want out
of life. Doesn't everyone want someone to care about, someone who will
love them unconditionally?"
The pain drove into Aylith's heart. Why would he not be silent?
"I don't know, I don't have much use for love. I've had a romance
or two. I guess most everyone has haven't they?"
"No use for love? You must be kidding. Everyone needs to love
and be loved don't they?"
"Can we change the subject?" Aylith asked quietly. Murray looked
at her, staring at her expressionless face. Yet the tone of her voice
warned him not to continue the conversation further.
"Alright, what should we talk about?" he asked
Aylith shrugged and kept walking, what was there to talk about?
He had already ruined her evening, there was really nothing else left
to say. They walked in silence until she reached the front door of the
small house that her and Terra shared.
"So I'll see you tomorrow at the hospital then?" he asked, looking
at her with his bright blue eyes filled with hope.
"I'll be there" she said with a smile, patting her jacket pocket.
Aylith unlocked her door as Murray turned and started off down the
street to his own home. She disappeared inside and locked the door
once again before walking into the kitchen. She picked up her
discarded half a sandwich and threw it in the trash can before walking
into the living room, lying down face down on the couch, her head
buried in her arms. She cried softly for a few moments, the evening
had been far too much for her. Why do people insist on digressing over
the subject of love? She allowed herself to cry for but a moment
before she sat up and wiped away the tears. She reached her hand out
to the remote control but stopped in mid reach. Who knew what sort of
show would taunt her on the television screen should she turn it on.
She sighed softly and walked down the hallway, becoming lost in her own
thoughts. It had been so long since it all happened, why should she
let it bother her now? Yet she could not help feeling the emptiness in
her heart. Love truly did seem far away, a very distant feeling, like
that of an ancient memory.
She padded into her bedroom and reached into her near empty
dresser draw, bringing forth her soft satin pajamas, a small satin
camisole with matching satin shorts. She touched them gingerly, she
had always adored the feeling of satin, and their icy blue colour
seemed to match the feeling in her heart. She shivered a bit as she
removed her clothes, she had never much liked the feeling of being so
exposed, where the cool air could reach her. She quickly slipped into
her satin pajamas, delighting in the feel of them against her skin.
She walked out of her bedroom and began to unbraid her hair as she
walked first to the kitchen, turning out all the lights. She then
moved to the living room, placing the elastic that held her hair around
her wrist, fluffing out her hair a bit so it hung in soft, relaxed
waves across her shoulders down to her waist. She turned out the
living room lights as well and started out down the hallway. She
paused a bit to stop and look at the paintings she had hung in the
hallway. She gave particular attention to the one in the center of the
hallway, a lovely image of a peacock. The peacock had always been her
mothers favorite animal, with it's brilliant colours and stunning
beauty. Aylith sighed heavily and turned into the wash room
Aylith looked herself in the mirror as she brushed out her hair,
watching the waves frame her face in such a way that it softened her
cold features. Her mother had hair like hers when Aylith was a little
girl. How funny that she should remember that now. She set down the
brush and brushed her teeth before she shut off the lights and went
into her bedroom.
As Aylith climbed into her bed and turned off her light. She could
feel the darkness of sleep begin to take her into it's arms. Her heart
filled with fear for only a moment. She worried that perhaps the
nightmares would assault her again. But her worries were short, for
sleep soon overtook her and there was nothing more in the dark abyss
than scattered dreams and images.
When Aylith awoke the next morning she shuddered slightly in
remembrance of the dream of the night before. She had dreamt of
herself, aged and dying. But not only that, she was alone. It was as
if the rest of the world had disappeared and she lay, dying, alone. It
had brought a slight fear to her heart. She shook her head softly,
trying to make herself forget as she got dressed and glanced at the
clock. It was near noon already and she had wanted to get to the
hospital in the early afternoon. She looked at the scattered paintings
that graced her floor and contorted her face in thought as she pulled
on a long, flowing black skirt, printed with small red flowers, before
buttoning up a red short sleeved shirt over her smooth skin. She
finally bent over and selected three of the paintings. The one was of
the tranquil forest, it was one of her favorites it offered such a look
of peace and serenity. Surely it would be welcome in the hospital.
The second was of the lake amongst the towering mountains, indeed the
lake did look inviting, how it's shore called to the viewer, inviting
it to step in and test the water. The trees dotted the horizon the
mountains looming protectively in the background. It looked as if it
were somewhere that would never grow cold. The third was one of her
most amazing works of art. At first one would think it was of a simple
forest clearing, but if one looked closer they could see a young
unicorn peeking out from between the trees, the butterflies spreading
their magic through the skies. You could almost hear the birds within
the picture. So much care and passion had been poured into the
paintings, Aylith felt sure that the children would appreciate them.
After a quick breakfast Aylith braided her hair and pinned it up
in the tight coil once again before bundling up her paintings. She
opened her door and the day was warm so she took only the paper with
the address upon it, and the bundle containing the paintings out with
her. As she closed the door behind her she realized that she had not
seen Terra about the house. But then again, Terra was always coming
and going. She walked to the hospital, her skirt twirling around her
ankles as she walked.
It was a farther walk than she thought it would be, but she
arrived, the sun having warmed her body bringing a slight flush to her
cheeks. She opened the door to the hospital and walked towards the
receptionist's desk.
"I'm here to see Doctor..."she paused a moment, realizing she
didn't know Murray's last name.
"Doctor who Ms.?" the receptionist asked sweetly
"Actually, i don't know his last name. We just met last night.
I'm Aylith and I'm here to see Murray. He does work here doesn't he?"
she asked, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she glanced down at
the written address
The receptionist chuckled slightly "So you're Aylith, Dr. Geran is
expecting you. He should be down in his office right now. First door
on your left."
"Thank you" Aylith said softly, following the receptionist's
directions as she walked down the hallway, knocking on the office door.
"Come in" A voice called.
Aylith opened the door and walked into the office, holding her
bundle gently in her arms.
"Oh, I'm so happy you came. The kids are really looking forward
to the paintings. How many paintings did you bring?" Murray said,
smiling brightly
"Three" Aylith responded
"Perfect", Murray said quietly "We can put them up now while they
are out taking in some of this beautiful sunlight. We can put one in
the main room and there were two little girls that had asked
specifically for the paintings. Does that sound good to you?"
"Sure, I guess. Where do we go?"
"This way, we'll hang the one in the main room first"
Murray lead the way down the hall to a main sitting room, with a
television and some books and toys and things about. The room was
painted a pale shade of pink and Aylith marvelled at it's gentle
colour, it was such a quiet and peaceful colour. She liked the room
already. She sat down in one of the chairs and unwound the bundle,
selecting the painting of the mountains and the lake, because of all
the lovely shades of blue that would compliment the soft pink.
Murray looked down at the painting and took in a sharp breath
"Wow, that's really beautiful. It looks so realistic and
inviting. They're really going to love it."
"Thanks" Aylith said with a smile as she picked it up and hung it
on the centre of an empty wall. She smiled, satisfied that it was
perfect there.
"Where to now?" she asked
"Samantha's room. She's 8 years old, gorgeous kid with these
bright green eyes. It's too bad that things work out the way they do.
She's such a sweet kid. She loves everything that's beautiful."
Murray said, leading the way into a small hospital room. "Get Well
Soon" cards sat upon the night stand beside a small bouquet of flowers.
Aylith shuddered at the coldness of the room, hospitals were always so
cold seeming. She picked up the picture of the tranquil forest and
hung it on the wall near the bed.
"Will she be able to see it good there do you think?"she asked,
looking at Murray.
"Yes, I think so. She'll love it. So one left then. We should
hurry before they get back. Amy's room is next" he said as he began to
lead the way towards a hospital room farther down the hall as he
continued to speak "She's 12 and has cancer. She is so adorable, if
you didn't know any better you would think she was just an ordinary
kid. She never let's on that anything is wrong with her. She always
seems so happy and so bright. It didn't even phase her when we told
her that the therapy she would go through would make her lose her hair.
Her parents bought her a few wigs and now she has a different hair
colour every other day, or she's content to not wear one at all. She's
one strong kid. I wish I had half the strength that she does."
They entered the room, it seemed as if Amy had been there for
awhile, she had a few posters up on the wall, the Get Well Cards had
been replaced by cards from all the different seasons; valentines,
birthday cards, christmas cards, cards for every occassion of the year.
Aylith smiled a bit and picked up the last painting as a small buzzer
beeped
Murray looked down at his pager
"I've got to go for a few moments, I'm sorry. You can hang that
up and wait for me in my office, or the main room or whatever you want.
I'll be back as soon as I can"
Aylith nodded as Murray turned around and disappeared down the
hall. She held the last painting in her hand, touching the unicorn
gently with her finger tips, before finding a clear space of wall to
hang it up upon. Only moments after she finished she was startled by a
young voice behind her.
"Hey, who are you?" said a young girl in a wheelchair being
pushed by a middle aged woman.
Aylith turned and smiled at her. "I'm Aylith, you must be Amy"
The girl nodded as the woman helped her up into bed who quietly
whispered "I'll be back in a few moments" before disappearing out the
door.
The girl smiled at Aylith and started to speak, her bright blue
eyes sparkled happily. Her head was covered by a blue kerchief that
seemed to compliment her beautiful eye colour "Yup I'm Amy. Hey, did
you paint that?" she asked, pointing to the picture with the unicorn
and butterflies.
"Yes" Aylith said smiling
"Cool!" Amy exclaimed "Hey, there's even a unicorn and butterflies
in it! That's really cool. You're really good at it. But how come
you hung it up in here?"
"Murray...I mean Dr. Geran, thought you might like it." Aylith
said, her eyes never leaving the girl, the smile never leaving her
lips, amazed with Amy's brilliant personality.
"Like it? I love it! But I know Samantha really wanted a picture
too. Maybe you should hang this up in her room."
"I already gave her one" Aylith replied with a smile
"Wow, you're really cool. Do you want to sit down for a few
minutes? My Mum should be back soon. She was the one that came in
here with me before."
"I'd love to stay, but I have to work this afternoon"
"Oh" Amy replied, looking a bit disappointed
"I promise I'll come back and visit another day" Aylith said with
a smile
"Okay" Amy said, perking up a little "Have fun at work"
"Thanks, I'll try" Aylith said with a smile before opening the
door to leave the room, offering a smile to Amy's mother as she passed
her and walked out into the hallway.
Aylith walked down the hallway and stopped stopped halfway to the
door as Murray walked up to her.
"So you met Amy eh?"
Aylith nodded "Yeah, I did. She's a real sweetheart. She asked
me to stay but I have to work this afternoon. Do you think I could
come by and see her sometime?"
Murray nodded, smiling at her. "You bet. Visiting hours are from
noon to 7 at night. I'm here most of the time. Speaking of which, are
you sure that you won't let me take you to dinner tonight?"
"Absolutly sure, but it was a nice offer thank you." Aylith said
with a soft smile before walking out the door and down the street to
the craft store where she worked. The sun was still bright as she
walked the short block to her work place and when she arrived she felt
quite at peace for the sunlight and the brief conversation with the
sweet girl.
The hours passed quickly for Aylith as she helped the customers
select just the right colours of paint, or the right sort of pencils to
create their own works of art. She adored her work, if anything came
close to the feeling she felt while painting it was the feeling that in
helping someone she knew they too would feel that same wonderful peace
and tranquility as they worked on their own projects.
When she left the shop the sun was beginning to set and she
started to walk towards her home. She paused to look at the hospital,
thinking of the girl with so much energy and youth. It pained her to
think that such a wonderful person was in the clutches of such a
horrible disease. And there upon the street she vowed that if nothing
else she would make an attempt to get to know this girl, to know one
person in the world truly well before it was too late for her to have
the chance. With renewed strength she walked home, a soft smile upon
her lips.
Before Aylith went to bed that night she realized that she still
hadn't seen Terra around the house. She was sure that Terra was
supposed to have the day off. She shrugged inwardly as she shut off
her light, deciding that Terra must have found someone else to spend
the day with. Or perhaps, as unlikely as it seemed, she had gone to
bed earlier. That night as the thick arms of darkness held Aylith in
their sleep filled embrace she closed her eyes, awaiting the attack of
the dreams. Yet none came, and when she awoke the next morning she
realized that no dreams had come at all, that her sleep had for once
been peaceful.
It was shortly after noon when Aylith awoke, the afternoon sun
shone brightly in her window. She smiled a bit, warmed by the light of
the brilliant star and climbed out of bed, dressing herself in a deep
blue, long denim dress. She braided her hair tightly and pinned it up
in it's usual coil before packing up a few of her older paint brushes,
paints and paper, along with a hard wooden board. She placed the
objects in a large knapsack and walked out into the hallway. She could
hear the radio playing in Terra's room and smiled a bit, happy to know
that she was home and alright. Aylith fixed herself some lunch and
dissappeared out the door, walking to the hospital, delighting in the
brilliant sunlight.
Something seemed different to Aylith that day. Perhaps it was
because her mind wasn't clouded with the images of nightmares from the
night past. Or perhaps it was because of her anticipation at getting
to speak to the brilliant girl again. Everything seemed so much more
clearer, the sunlight seeking out and destroying the dark whever it
hid. Even the noise of the traffic seemed to melt away against the
soft noises of the birds chirping in nearby trees.
By the time Aylith reached the hospital she was feeling happier
than usual, the sun seeming to have warmed her soul slightly. Yet her
heart remained so cold. She felt happy yet truly, deep inside of her
she felt there was no real reason for her to be there, or anywhere.
Yet she pushed that aside and walked up to the receptionist.
"Ah, Aylith right?" The woman asked.
Aylith nodded.
"Looking for Doctor Geran again?" the receptionist asked curiously
"Oh not today. Actually I was hoping to see Amy, is she around at
the moment?"
The receptionist reached out her hand to touch the hand that
Aylith had resting against the counter. "Honey, these kids are around
all the time. But I know what you mean. She's awake and in her room
right now. You can go on down if you like. She'll be happy to have a
visitor I think, her Mother hasn't been around as much any more. She's
been working quite a bit, she has two other children to support other
than Amy and she does it all alone, poor dear. But I suppose I'm
babbling aren't I?" The woman smiled and let go of her hand
"Thank you" Aylith replied quietly for lack of better words and
wandered down the hall to Amy's room, where she poked her head in
slightly.
"Can I come in?" Aylith said with a bit of a smile
Amy looked up from her bed and gently set down a copy of "Little
Women" down on her nightstand and grinned at her.
"Sure come on in. I'm glad you came back to visit."
"I'm glad too, what's that you were reading?" Aylith asked as she
walked into the room, sitting down on a chair beside Amy's bed.
"Little Women, It's really good. I'm just at where Meg gets
married. Are you married?"
"No, I've never been married. I don't know if I ever will be"
Aylith said softly, the talk stabbing repeatedly at her heart. Of
course she'd never be married, a person who has no love in their heart
could possibly ever get married.
"That's too bad" Amy replied. "I'm going to get married someday
and I'll have an enormous wedding with all my friends and family there.
And the dress will be absolutly gorgeous with lots of little pearls and
diamonds and things on it, and a huge train that my bridesmaids will
carry. And of course I'll get married to someone who loves me as much
as Meg's husband loves her."
"That sounds beautiful" Aylith said, not being able to help but
smile, although the words caused her so much pain.
"Have you ever been in love Aylith?"
"Yes...yes...a long time ago though" Aylith returned in a barely
audible whisper
"What's it like?"
"Well...how do I explain? It's one of the best and the worst
things in your entire life. When things are good they are the best and
it feels like nothing could ever go wrong. But when things are bad
you'll never feel worse. It sort of swallows you all up and you can't
think of anything else but the person you're in love with. You think
of them before you fall asleep, and they're the first thing you think
of when you wake up. It's terribly confusing" Aylith said, looking at
the girl as she returned from her brief speech.
"That sounds beautiful" Amy said taking in a deep breath. "But if
you were so in love with someone how come you never got married?"
Aylith smiled a bit at the girl's innocence. What a pity that
most people lose that childlike innocence and delight as they grow
older and their hearts grow colder and more bitter.
"I guess he didn't love me as much as I loved him"
"I bet that wasn't it. I bet he just didn't realize that he loved
you. You're really cool you know? Most grown ups won't talk about
this sort of stuff with me."
Aylith smiled softly as she spoke "You're a special kid"
"Are you just saying that because I'm sick?" Amy asked, looking at
her suspiciously.
"No, I'm saying it because I mean it. If half the adults I knew
were as cheerful as you are I think I could spend the rest of my life
just sitting around listening to them talk. You're really special Amy,
I mean that."
"Thanks!" Amy replied grinning from ear to ear. "I think your
special too. Only special people could paint such cool stuff"
Aylith smiled softly. "Would you like to learn how to paint?"
"Would I ever!"
Aylith smiled brightly again, happy to be able to share some
knowledge and placed the wooden board over Amy's lap, laying a piece of
paper across it as she removed the paints and brushes from the
knapsack, setting them down beside her.
"What do you want to paint?" Aylith asked, looking at Amy.
"Um...how about a picture of a lady in a wedding dress, one just
like the one I told you about before."
Aylith smiled a bit and nodded, putting the paint brush in Amy's
hand, helping her to dip it in the paint and move it across the page in
gentle brush strokes as the picture began to form before them
"Wow, this is SO cool!" Amy exclaimed. "You know something? When
I grow up I'm going to be a painter just like you and I'm going to put
my pictures up all over the world so that everyone can look at them and
be happy at how pretty they are."
Aylith smiled as she helped Amy paint. "That's a beautiful dream
Amy. Your Mother will be really proud of your work. You're a
natural."
Amy beamed up at her, her blue eyes shining with happiness.
"Thanks, You're a really nice person Aylith. Do you see your Mum much?
She must be really proud of the stuff you paint too."
"I don't see my Mother any more. She died 5 years ago."
"Oh I'm sorry. Do you mind if I ask what happened? My
Grandmother died a few years ago because she was really sick. I bet
her and your Mum know each other. I bet they both have really
beautiful sets of angel wings and play music that sparkles in the sky
when they touch their little harps. At least that's what my Mum says.
She says Grandmother is really happy in heaven, that it's the most
beautiful place in the world where everybody is happy and healthy"
Aylith smiled at the Amy's description, there was nothing else she
could do. The pain of the memory seemed to fade a way a bit with the
girl's peaceful description of heaven and she nodded to her.
"She died in a car accident with my Father. I...I'm sure you're
right. I bet they are very happy."
Aylith and Amy finished the painting and they both looked down at
it, admiring the picture. It was obvious that Amy had a natural talent
for it, for Aylith had barely needed to guide her strokes at all after
the first few. Aylith watched as Amy took the brush on her own and
added a set of beautiful white feathered angel wings to the dress.
When she looked up at Aylith she smiled softly.
"They're for me, so I can still get married when I go to heaven."
Aylith looked at her in amazment, stunned. She sat there looking
at her a moment, not quite sure what to say.
"Oh it's OK" Amy said with a little grin. "I know I'm going to
go to heaven soon. And when I go I won't be sick anymore and I'll have
all my hair back. Maybe I'll even get to say hello to your Mum."
Aylith nodded slightly and smiled softly at her.
"You'll make a beautiful angel Amy" she said softly, for a lack of
better words, small tears misted over her eyes at the way the girl
could speak so positively about her own death.
"Thanks" Amy said brightly. "You'll be a beautiful angel someday
too." Amy looked at Aylith a bit, her eyes pausing slightly at the
coiled braid on top of her head. "Would you take your hair down for
me? I bet you look really pretty with your hair down. I love long
hair and yours must be awfully long for you to have it all pinned up
like that."
Aylith nodded
"Sure" she said as she reached up and unpinned her hair, sliding
the pins into her pocket. She slid the elastic off the end of her
braid and unbraided the thick rope of hair until it rippled down her
back in soft brown waves. She placed the elastic in her pocket as well
and ran her fingers through her hair, brushing through it gently as her
hair tumbled over her shoulders to frame her face with the soft waves.
"Wow..." Amy said with a bright smile.
Aylith grinned at Amy as a nurse walked into the room.
"I hate to disturb you two, but it's after seven o'clock and only
family is allowed to stay after visiting hours." the nurse said in a
gentle voice.
"Alright" Aylith said, standing up from her chair as she set the
knapsack down beside Amy's bed. "You can keep the paints and things, I
have plenty more at home."
"Cool! Thanks Aylith! You're the best!" Amy said as she reached
her arms out towards Aylith.
Aylith grinned and leaned over, enclosing the girl in a gentle
embrace before leaving the room, watching the nurse close the door
before she started off down the hallway.
A tiny tear rolled down her cheek as she thought of Amy. A
beautiful girl with a beautiful personality. A girl who was destined
to leave this world without ever growing old enough to know what it's
like to be a woman. The thought made Aylith terribly sad, yet she
couldn't help to think of the things she had said. That perhaps her
beau of long ago had loved her without realizing it, and that perhaps
her parents really were safe in some other plane of beauty, peace and
tranquility. The thoughts seemed to comfort her a bit as she walked
past the receptionists desk, trying to hold back more tears.
"Are you all right dear?" the receptionist asked as Aylith passed
by her and placed her hands upon the door handle
"Yes, I...I...I'm fine.." Aylith stammered slightly as she turned
to leave, pulling open the door.
"Aylith? Aylith? Wait a moment!" a male voice called from down
the hallway
Aylith turned around, another tear streaking her cheek as she saw
Murray hurrying down the hallway towards her.
Murray stopped in front of her and smiled softly.
"You saw Amy again, right?"
Aylith nodded without speaking.
Murray looked at her sympathetically and wiped a tear from her
face.
"Look, my shift is over and you look a little upset. Let me take
you out to dinner so you can calm down a bit before you go home."
Aylith nodded silently, allowing Murray to lead her out to an
older made black oldsmobile. She sat down quietly in the passenger
seat, not speaking as Murray got in beside her and started the vehicle,
driving to a quiet restaurant away from her usual neighborhood.
When they arrived at the restaurant Murray got out and opened the
door for her before leading her inside the quiet restaurant. The
restaurant itself was quite small, it appeared to be family run and
only very quiet, soothing music played in the background, quite the
contrast to "Evening's Paradise". They were seated and ordered their
meals, Aylith speaking ever so quietly as the waiter took her order.
"Are you okay Aylith?" Murray asked gently
Aylith nodded before speaking. "Yes, I think so. I was just
really upset back at the hospital. Why does such a great kid have to
be stuck in such a crummy situation?"
"I know it's really tough. Alot of people can't stand to be
around the hospital. You have to be really strong to do it."
"I can see why. I told her how my parents had died years ago and
she told me how happy they must be in heaven and how she would speak to
them when she got there herself. She's so young. I don't see where
this is fair at all. She knows more than half the adults I know."
Murray nodded. "That's why I wanted you to met her. I wish the
whole world could met her. I wish the world could meet all the kids in
that hospital. I don't know why they're so smart. I think maybe it's
because they fit all the wisdom they would have in their entire lives
into the few years or months they have left."
"How long will Amy...you know.."Aylith asked quietly
"I wish I could give you good news on that one Aylith, but the
truth is Amy is really, really sick at the moment and the treatments
aren't helping her anymore. You'd never know it from her attitude
though. Are you sure you're alright?"
Aylith nodded quietly as the waiter brought their food to the
table, which she poked at quietly at her food.
"Aylith?" Murray asked quietly
"Yes?"
"I want to ask you not to stop visiting her, no matter how painful
it is. The nurse said she really thinks highly of you and you must
really like her too. Right now what Amy needs is someone to be there
with her, someone to care about her. Her mother is there as often as
she can be, but it's hard for her to be there all the time. Please
keep visiting her."
"I never intended to stop"
"You really are a strong person" Murray said with a slight smile.
"I'm not"
"No really, it takes alot of strength to do what you're planning
on doing. And from the sounds of things you haven't ever had a very
easy life have you? You had mentioned your parents dying earlier.
Would you like to talk about it a bit, or is it very personal?"
Aylith shrugged. "I can talk about it I guess. It's been a long
time since I have though. It was 5 years ago, I was 19 at the time.
It was the worst moment in my life. It was a tragic accident. They
were coming home from visiting with friends and were hit by a drunk
driver and were killed almost instantly. I never even knew about it
until the people from the hospital called me. Not only that but only
days before the man I had been dating since we were in high school had
left me. After the accident I felt like I didn't have the strength to
love anyone anymore. See I'm really not as strong as you think I am.
I havn't loved a soul since that day. From what I've seen love only
leads to pain. Everyone I ever loved was taken away from me. For the
longest time I felt I had nothing to live for. I thought about suicide
from time to time, but I never really entertained the idea of actually
doing it. I just wanted to escape from everything I was feeling. And
then I started night classes at the Art School and learned to paint.
It's what I live for and what brings me peace in this chaotic world."
Murray looked at her, his eyes widened slightly, as he paused a
moment, before collecting his words.
"That's one of the saddest tales I have ever heard. You are wrong
on one thing though. Anyone who could have endured all that is
definately a strong person. But I feel badly about asking, surely that
must have hurt somewhat to tell the tale"
"Oddly enough it didn't, It felt quite good to get it all out."
Aylith said looking down slightly with a soft flush to her cheeks.
Murray nodded and smiled softly at her as they finished their food
in silence. As they finished the meal Murray set down his utensils and
looked at Aylith a bit.
"Do you think you will ever love again?"
Aylith shook her head no "No, I don't think so."
Murray nodded, looking a bit dissapointed. "Well then I will
respect that. Friends then?"
"Yes, that would suit me well. I just don't think I could get
involved in a romantic relationship...now, or ever. It's not that
you're not a terrific person, you are. It's just that I couldn't
handle being anything more than friends."
Murray nodded "I can respect that as well."
They got up from the table and paid their bills before walking out
to the car. Murray drove Aylith to her home in silence. As he dropped
her off at her house he spoke for the first time during the drive,
breaking the silence.
"I'll see you around the hospital again then?"
"Of course. Amy is a really special girl"
"She sure is. I'm glad you two met."
Aylith smiled softly and reached over, squeezing Murray's hand
gently.
"I'm glad Amy and I met as well. And I'm glad you and I met also.
Thank you for letting me tell you my story. It's been so long since I
last talked about it and it almost feels as if a great weight has been
lifted from me"
Murray smiled at her. "Of course. I'm glad we're friends. Good
night Aylith"
"Good night"
And with that Aylith got out of the automobile and walked into her
home, finding the door unlocked, silently cursing Terra for not
remembering to lock the door when she went out. She sighed softly to
herself, not able to comprehend how her room mate could stand to have
such a busy life. As she closed the door and locked it behind her she
could hear a soft sobbing coming from farther within the house.
"Terra?" she called out softly.
There was no answer as she walked farther into the house, through
the kitchen and into the living room where she saw Terra lying on the
couch, curled tightly into a ball. Her blond hair had lost it's bounce
as it hung limply around her head, hiding her face which was buried
deep in her arms. A soft sobbing noise came from within the tight
little cocoon that Terra had created of her body.
"Terra?" Aylith whispered softly
Terra looked up a bit and then suddenly covered her face with her
hands, trying to shield her face from Aylith's gaze. But it was
already too late, for Aylith had seen the enourmous purple bruise
across her tear stained face.
"Good Lord Terra, what happened?" Aylith said softly sitting down
beside her.
Terra just looked up at her and dropped her hands, crying softly
as she stammered out her words
"He...he..hit...me" she said with a trembling voice.
Aylith carefully placed an arm around Terra's shoulder, as Terra
leaned against Aylith. Aylith gently reached out and stroked Terra's
hair.
"Who hit you Terra?"
"D..D..D...Dan" Terra replied softly
"Did he have any reason to hit you?"
"Well...um...sort...of..."
"What do you mean?" Aylith asked carefully
"Well..me and him were sort of together, but I met this guy at
work...and I brought him back here...and we were here on the couch and
then...well..you know... and then Dan came in looking for me 'cuz I
forgot to lock the door...and he was angry...real angry..and he yelled
at Mike, the guy I brought back, and threatened to kill him if he
didn't get out...so Mike took off and then Dan hit me really hard right
across the face...he said if I was going to act like a cheap whore he
was gonna treat me like one...and then he left...Oh God he hit me! It
hurt so bad Aylith..." Terra replied between sobs, clinging onto Aylith
Aylith sighed softly and held onto Terra.
"He had every right to be mad you know. But you're right, he had
no right to hit you. Are you going to press charges?"
"N...n..no"
"Why not?"
"He won't do it again...I know him"
"Terra you're just setting yourself up to be the victim again. If
he did it once what's to stop him from doing it again?"
"I..I don't know" Terra stammered, burying her head into Aylith's
shoulder
"Just think it over some more okay? You should probably get some
sleep now"
Terra nodded and Aylith helped her up and lead her to her bedroom.
Aylith sat Terra down on her bed and then got up to return to her own
bedroom, it had been a long day for them both. As she approached the
doorway to Terra's bedroom Terra called out to her quietly.
"Thank you Aylith...I didn't think you gave a damn about what
happened to me." she called after her quietly
Aylith stopped and turned to look at Terra, a bit taken back by
the comment before she began to speak, after a slight pause.
"I guess everyone needs someone to care about them. I'm just glad
you're alright." And with that Aylith left, closing the door behind
her.
Aylith went out upon her nightly ritual of turning of the lights
and brushing out her hair before she went to sleep. That night her
dreams were worse than they had been in weeks. Terrifying images threw
themselve at her and she woke up multiple times in a deathly cold
sweat, taking her near an hour each time just to coax her body back
into sleep.
When Aylith awoke the next morning it was very early, as she had
been awakened by a dream and decided to stay up rather than try to go
back to sleep. She felt shaken by the tormented night, yet she also
felt happier, something about the day before had touched her somehow,
in some way or another. But as she blinked in the morning sunlight her
first real thought was of Amy. She glanced over at her calender and
realized that she had another day off and smiled softly to herself as
she realized that having the day off meant that she could see Amy
again. She quickly got dressed, slipping into a trim white dress with
thin straps, with brilliant flowers embroidered upon it. She was about
to pin up her hair when she remembered how delighted Amy was with her
long hair and simply brushed it until it shone with a soft luster.
Aylith looked at her clock and sighed, realizing she had a full
three hours to wait until visiting hour at the hospital. Aylith stood
in her hallway for a few moments, trying to decide what to do with her
three hours before wandering into the kitchen to fix herself some
breakfast. She turned on the radio as she sat down at her table with a
bowl of cereal. She looked down into her cereal as the soft love songs
played. It tugged at her heart, but she refused to allow herself to
turn off the radio, or allow the tears to fall from her eyes once more.
With the songs to hasten her desire to leave the room she finished her
breakfast quickly and retreated back to her bedroom, leaving the radio
to continue play.
She had almost reached her bedroom door, when she stopped to think
of Terra again. She opened the door to Terra's room and peered in.
Terra was asleep, a journal lay open on the nightstand, the pages on it
were crinkled where salty tears had fallen upon the pages. Aylith
pressed her lips together slightly in thought. She wanted so much to
help Terra, yet Terra was a grown woman and was really the only person
who could do anything about her situation. Suddenly Aylith's lips
parted in a slight smile as she slipped out of the room and into her
own bedroom.
Aylith sat down on the cushion in the middle of her floor and
picked up a fresh sheet of paper and a brush. She worked quickly, her
eyes sparkled with a sort of life that had dissappeared over the years.
Her passion for her work passed through her fingers and into the brush,
and finally out onto the page. The colours she chose lit up the page
in all magnificence, bringing out the colours of a beautiful sunrise
beside a crystal clear lake. The page seemed to pull Aylith into it,
she could almost feel the chill of the air as the sun began to rise
upon the horizon, she could feel the sand between her toes, the water
lapping at her ankles. It felt as if she was there, watching the
beauty of nature it's self.
She was almost dissappointed as she finished the painting,
saddened that she had to come back to reality. She etched the words
"Dare to Dream of a Better Day" at the bottom of the painting and held
it gently on the palms of her hands, rising from the cushion to move
into Terra's room where she placed the painting down over the journal,
covering the tear stained pages, with the beautiful painting. She
smiled softly down at Terra's sleeping figure and walked back out of
Terra's room and into her own.
Aylith glanced at the clock and realized it was time for her to
leave for the hospital so she could be there right when visiting hours
started. She turned to walk out of her room again when suddenly the
small violet coloured box caught her eye. She paused a moment, looking
at it before bending low to scoop it up in her hands. She held it
there for a long moment, staring at the pale pink rose on it's lid and
reached out to touch it gently, her finger tips caressing it's surface,
almost wishing the rose was real so she could feel it's beauty. She
stared at the box intently and then kneeled down, as if in a trance and
carefully wrote the word "Amy" beneath the rose on the lid with the
same pale pink paint as the petals of the flower. She smiled brightly
and carried it carefully in her hands, so as not to muss the paint.
Not even the sounds of the birds were noticable to Aylith at that
time. She thought solely of Amy, of the girl's cheerful little smile,
or how warm her embrace was, of how much beauty Amy held in her heart.
As she neared the hospital her lips were held in a warm smile, holding
the now dry painted box close to her heart as she opened the doors to
the hospital and slipped inside, nodding to the receptionist as she
walked on past, and down the hall to Amy's room.
Aylith peeked inside first before stepping into Amy's room. Amy
was lying on the bed, her eyes half shut. Her skin had grown to a
ghostly pale that frightened Aylith as she called to her softly, not
sure if she was awake.
"Amy?"
Amy's eyelids fluttered open a bit and she smiled a big grin at
Aylith, her voice not as loud as usual but still retaining it's usual
cheerfulness as she spoke
"Hey, come on in"
Aylith smiled to her and sat down in the chair beside her.
"How are you doing Amy?"
"Oh I'm okay. Dr.Geran says I should sleep some today, that I'm
sick or something. I dunno, I feel okay, a little bit sleepy that's
all." she said with a little grin.
"You do look sort of tired, I won't stay long then." Aylith said
softly
"Oh no, it's okay. I'll let you know when I'm too tired to talk
anymore" Amy replied, grinning as she yawned a little yawn.
Aylith nodded and handed her the little painted box
"I made this for you"
"Oh wow!" Amy exclaimed quietly "This is really beautiful, thank
you so much. I'll treasure it forever and ever"
Amy grinned at her as she set it down on the night table, leaning
back into her pillows. She looked so tired that it frightened Aylith,
but the merriment in her voice consoled her somewhat.
"You look afraid" said Amy quietly, glancing at Aylith a bit with
her half closed eyes
"Do I? I was trying to hide it" Aylith said with a soft smile
Amy grinned at her "You shouldn't worry so much. You'll get an
ulcer like my Mum. Besides, I told you I was OK, just tired. And even
if I wasn't alright I'd hate for everyone to be all afraid for me. I'm
going to be really happy when I get to heaven, I just want everyone
else to be happy too. Happy that I'll be happy and not sick anymore."
Aylith smiled softly "You're not afraid at all?"
Amy opened her eyes a bit more and looked lost in thought for a
few seconds. "Nope, not really. I'm a little bit afraid of how Mum
will be without me, but I know I'm gonna go to heaven and that I'm
going to be really happy there. You know, you're the only adult that's
ever asked me that. They don't like to talk about dying around me.
But it's really okay. I know I'm going to die someday and I know that
when I do the angels are going to take my soul and carry me to heaven
where I'll be happy and I'll never ever get sick again."
Aylith nodded a bit and remained silent, not sure what to say.
She glanced at the picture of the wedding dress that she and Amy had
painted together and then back at Amy, not being able to look at her
pale face as she began to speak softly
"Amy, I..." she paused and looked up at Amy's face. She realized
Amy had fallen asleep, her breathing soft, her chest rising ever so
slightly. She looked like a little angel, a saint, as she lay sleeping
in the hospital bed.
Aylith sighed softly and got up from the chair and turned to walk
out of the room. As she was turning the corner to turn down the
hallway her body met with another as she thumped into the woman she had
seen before. She soon realized it was Amy's mother.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention" Aylith said quietly
"It was my fault" the woman replied, glancing at her. "Are you
Aylith?"
Aylith nodded "Yes, that's me"
The woman smiled at her. "My name is Emily, I'm Amy's mum. I
just wanted to thank you for what you've been doing for her. She talks
about you constantly. She admires you. I just can't thank you enough.
I can't be here all the time and I'm just so happy to know that there
is someone else who comes to visit her. This is such a hard time for
us all. How is she today?"
"She's asleep right now. She really doesn't look too well to me.
She said she was just tired, I guess she and Dr. Geran would know more
about it than I do."
Emily nodded. "Well, I'm going to go sit with her now so I'll be
there when she wakes up."
"It was nice to meet you Emily, you have a very special daughter."
"It was nice to meet you as well. And my daughter has a very
special friend" Emily replied before walking into the small hospital
room.
Aylith refused to let herself cry as she left the hospital. The
rest of her day swirled around her. All she could think of all day was
of Amy, of how special she was. Yet worry seemed to eat her alive.
She was so afraid that something would happen to Amy. Aylith spent her
hours pushing the fears from her mind and simply sat around her living
room, replaying the words they had exchanged in her mind. The hours
passed quickly and that night as Aylith slept her horrid dreams were
chased away by bright visions of sun lit paradises.
When Aylith awoke she knew that she had to see Amy again, even if
it meant losing her job because of missed hours. She phoned her
workplace and told them she was taking the day, no the week off and
wouldn't stop to listen to their arguments. She dressed quickly,
leaving her hair down once again. Her outfit another summer dress with
printed flowers upon it.
As she was about to leave the house she noticed a letter addressed
to her, sitting on the table.
"Dear Aylith," it read, "Thank you for everything. I've spent
alot of time thinking about this and I've decided you're right. I
can't let that bastard get away with this. I'm going to give the
police my statement today. In the mean time I will be staying at a
women's shelter where he can't find me. I just want to thank you so
much for everything. Before you came home last night I thought maybe
it would be easier to kill myself than to put up with all the pain I
was going through. And laying there on the couch I thought no one
cared. But then you came home, and you left that painting on my
journal and I realized that you cared, that someone cared enough about
me to think of me and to do something nice enough to try to brighten my
day. I'll never be able to repay this debt to you. I know we havn't
got along so well in the past, but I hope we can fix that. I want to
start over and not get myself into this mess again, but more than
anything I want you as a friend. I want to somehow repay you for
everything. Thank you so much."
The letter was signed by Terra. Aylith held the letter to her
chest for a moment, a small tear rolled down her cheek. She was
incredibly touched by the words Terra had written and vowed that she
too would work to build a friendship between the two of them. She
folded the letter carefully and tucked it into a pocket before leaving
the house to go to the hospital.
It was the brightest day Aylith had ever seen. Which such kind
words held close to her heart and the thoughts of Amy in her head
Aylith felt as if nothing could stop her. She couldn't wait to get to
the hospital to talk to Amy. Surely Amy would be able to talk much
longer after gettting some rest. Aylith felt invisible to the world as
she walked into the hospital, thinking only of Amy.
As she opened the door her good mood crashed suddenly to the
ground as she could see Emily sobbing as Murray had a reassuring hand
layed upon her shoulder. They both looked at the door as she entered.
Aylith stood stunned as she felt her mouth move in stammers.
"No..no...don't tell me something's happened...good Lord no.."
Murray let go of Emily for a moment and placed an arm around
Aylith's shoulder, leading her in.
"I'm afraid so. Come in and sit down." he said quietly, leading
both Aylith and Emily into a waiting room. He held Aylith's hands
gently in his as he spoke
"She died last night, she didn't suffer much as she died in her
sleep."
Aylith nodded numbly, bowing her head slightly as she pulled her
hands away from Murray covering her face as she sobbed. Both her and
Emily cried for a moment before she felt Emily nudge a small object
into Aylith's hands.
"You should keep this." Emily whispered quietly to Aylith
Aylith looked down at the little painted box and ran her
fingertips along the lettering of Amy's name, her tears splashing
against the surface of the box as she lifted it's little lid, finding
inside a few papers folded carefully within it. She pressed her lips
together tightly, trying to hold back the tears as she lifted out the
papers. The first was the painting of the wedding dress that Amy and
Aylith had painted together. She brushed a tear away from her face
gently as she moved the paper to the bottom of the small pile and
looked at the second picture. It was a painting, almost perfectly
done, a near perfect image of Amy with only a few slight changes, she
had a shimmering mane of blond hair and pair of bright, white angel
wings. Aylith reached out and grabbed onto the nearest hand to her,
not sure whether it was Murray's or Emily's, not really caring as she
wept softly, her hand trembling as she reached for the last sheet of
paper. Upon it was the most heart wrenching image. It was a picture
of Aylith, dressed in her button down red shirt with her long brown
hair falling in soft waves around her face, her lips parted in a merry
smile, her eyes twinkling with life, all the worry lines from her face
seemed to have been erased in the portrait.
Aylith dropped the painting to her lap and covered her face with
her hands, crying for a long time before looking up at Murray and
Emily, folding the papers carefully as she replaced them in the box.
Her face was red and tearstained, as was Emily's when she looked at
Emily.
"Thank you. I really...loved...Amy" she whispered, pausing as
she mentioned the word love.
Murray smiled softly at Aylith's words, listening as Emily spoke
to her "I know you did. She loved you too." And with that the two
women embraced, their tears falling freely on each other's shoulders
until it seemed that there were no tears left to cry.
"I want to be alone now." Aylith whispered quietly as she got up
from the chair. Murray and Emily both nodded to her
"Take care of yourself Aylith" Murray said to her softly
Aylith responded with a nod, clutching the box to her chest as she
walked out the door and down the street. Her body felt numb and empty.
She continued to cry as strangers stopped to stare at her as she
passed. Finally her vision cleared enough for her to notice a small
church. She walked towards the church and entered it quietly, brushing
the tears away from her face.
Inside the church only a few people knelt in prayer. Others sat
in pews. Near the alter many candles burned. The people within barely
looked up as Aylith walked down the red carpeted aisle and knelt before
the alter, picking up an unlit candle, lighting it as she whispered
quietly
"For you Amy. You taught me to love again. After 5 years it took
you only 2 days to accomplish what no one else I knew could, not even
myself. I light this candle for you dear Amy, in your memory. And I
will do as you asked. I will be happy that you are safe and happy now
wherever you are. I have so much to thank you for, for the friends I
have made while I've known you, and for the advice you have given me.
Who would have known that a 12 year old girl could no more than people
twice her age. Allow me to grieve dear Amy for I will miss you so, I
feel the ache in my heart terribly. Know that I will never forget you
Amy because deep in my heart I realize that I love you tremendously.
You gave me the greatest gift of all, you gave me love." and with that
Aylith placed the candle amongst the others and bowed her head ever so
slightly in the deepest respect and love.
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