Going to college can sometimes be hard on kids and their parents. That separation can cause anxiety, depression, or even pure joy. In any case, if any of you college kids want to write home at any time, here is something you can print out to make writing home easy.
Date:_____________
Dear Parent(s),
I am too busy to write, but this checklist covers most of the topics of interest to both of us.
Please send:
___Money (Cash!) Amount:____________
___Food (Cookies!) Dozens:_______
___Clean clothes!
Relationships:
___What?
___I am in love with myself
___I am in love!
___I am engaged
___I got married last weekend
My Roommate:
___Worships the ground I walk on
___Gave me a black eye
___Committed suicide and left a note saying I was the reason
___Is afraid of the dark and wants to sleep with me in my bed??
___Has fleas
My Professors Are:
___Sadistic water walkers
___Mental institution escapees
___Brain dead nerds
___Super oxygen thieves
Latest news:
___I wrecked the car
___I can't use your credit card because I have exceeded the credit limit
___You are going to have a grandchild
___False alarm - you are NOT going to have a grandchild
Food:
___Is great!
___Even makes me appreciate your cooking
___I have had pizzas for the last eleven meals
Grades:
___I am making all A's
___I am not being properly challenged
___I will be home after this semester
I study:
___Night and day
___All the time
___Only on Sunday afternoons
___None of the above
Daily Devotions:
___I read my Bible every day
___I can't read
___Someone stole my Bible while I was at the bar
On my last visit home, I left:
___My glasses
___My paper that was due yesterday
___The clothes you washed for me
___My (girlfriend's) birth control pills
___The check to cover my deliquent tuition payment
___Other___________________
Please send above items by Federal Express (Priority One) or UPS (Blue)
Laundry:
___My underwear is now___________
___I am saving money by not using detergent
___Don't worry, I washed my clothes last semester
___I hang my clothes out the window when it rains
My room:
___Can pass your "white glove" test
___Is only____% full
___Could not be located last Saturday night
___Was rented by the ROTC for hazardous terrain training
Parties:
___I don't inhale
___I only go to meet people
___Haven't been to one since this morning
Hope you:
___Miss me
___Can live without me
___Are not overdoing the celebration of my absence
Salutation:
___Your Daughter,
___Your son,
___Yours,
Signature (Scribble if Pre-Med or Pre-Law)___________________________