One Sunday morning, a wild hair sprouted in tinker's ass when she left her house frustrated by Mr. tinker's inconsideration. He showed just how inconsiderate he was when he left the kids with her anytime he pleased, went anywhere he pleased, and returned anytime he pleased. Fed up, she told him she needed time by herself. Instead of driving somewhere only to sulk and depress herself further, she decided to rescue her friends from the same torture, for their hubbies took advantage of them as well. She drove to Thumper's house and convinced Mr. Thumper that they were only going to the store. tinker told Thumper her plan of escape for the day, and Thumper was all for it. Thumper had also grown weary of the day to day, same ole same ole stuff. Off they went. Next stop... Wildthang's house.
It couldn't have been a more perfect day for a meeting, for Wildthang was in the mood for a girl's day out too. Her hubby didn't give them as much hesitation as they expected...he even gave her money!! Of course, he didn't realize how long they would be gone. Nevertheless, they were on their way to a day of freedom to do whatever they pleased.
They rode across hills and hollows and smoked until low and behold, they came across Mr. Thumper's boss. The girls told him their frustrations and he took pity on them. He managed to hook them up with some liquor and he told them they could use an empty house that he owned to party in. The house came equipped with stereo, music, playing cards, and furniture. Hell, he even gave them a 4-wheelin' ride in his great BIG truck. Wildthang didn't care for the ride (she gets kinda squirmy about shaking herself up like that). But tinker and Thumper had a ball. After the adventurous ride through the woods, the girls took over Mr. Thumper's boss's house. Mr. Thumper's boss said he had other things to do that evening, but promised he would return later with more liquor. After about 15 minutes, the girls became bored. They decided to get all the women they could find to come with them and have an all girl party. However, the only other girl they could track down was Mr. tinker's best buddy's wife (we will call her "String Bean"). Off they went.
They returned to the empty house. They felt cold, and decided to build a fire in the wood stove. The lack of firewood forced them to go outside and search for some. While they were searching for kindling and wood, they came across a deck of playing cards. As the kindling caught fire and more wood was placed on it, the girls listened to music, played cards, laughed, gossiped about their hubbies, worried about what the hubbies would have to say when they returned home, and smoked (they had drank all the liquor by this point). Failing to keep his promise to the girls, Mr. Thumper's boss did not return and the girls decided to take revenge. They found mustard, ketchup, and mayonaise in the fridge, and using their imagination, they quickly figured out what they could do with the condiments. Upon his return to his vacant "party house", he found no women, but messages written with the condiments. The messages were as follows: "Build a fire next time", "Where's the food?", and "Where were you?". Wonder how mad he got?

written by: tinker