Once upon a time... there was an aspiring poet named Froot Loop. She really loved to read the poetry of all the great poets like... the Gummie Bear King and the Super Lasagna. One day she was walking down a lovely dirt path in the woods looking for inspiration when... a cute little furry squirrel jumped out in front of her. She said, "Oh, what a cute little squirrel." The squirrel stood on its hind legs and started screeching at her so she... threw her MaJik jellybeans at it. These were no ordinary MaJik jellybeans. They were the "special" MaJik jellybeans and when they hit the ground in front of that seemingly cute squirrel... a huge giant squirrel appeared in front of the little psycho squirrel. The little squirrel quaked in fear. "Wh-wh-what do you want???" stammered the furry forest creature... the giant squirrel grinned a giant grin, and swished his giant tail, all the while his giant squirrel eyebrows were flaring. "I want you to call a meeting of the IFSL (inter forest squirrel league) and tell them to... assist poor Froot Loop in writing a poem glorifying squirrels everywhere and informing the world that they will be assimilated into the great Squirrel culture. When Froot Loop heard this, she... was enthralled, but wary of the frightening little wretch. He HAD, after all, screeched at her. So keeping her distance, she followed the crabby rodent into his hollow, deep in the woods, little did she know... that she was being transported into the evil Squirrel Empire. When they came upon the Squirrelly Gates, she saw a sight that horrified her... it was her bestest friend in the world, dressed up as a squirrel and tied to a stake in the ground. She'd heard about these squirrel sacrifices before: if they couldnt find a volunteer, they had to find an innocent. Froot Loop took out the MaJik spatula the sweet and lovably faery (*G*) had given her and... pointed it at the squirrelly gates. She zaPped (is that right?) them and they swung open. The little screechy squirrel warned her not to do anything, but this was her BESTEST friend in the world, so she pointed the spatula at all the demonic little squirrels and... they of course disintigrated. She untied her friend but as she was doing this she realized she had forgotten the most important part of the legends: they must turn the innocent into a squirrel and that was what they had jsut done. Her friend shrunk down and began snapping at Froot Loop's heels as she ran... Froot Loop was quite distressed and racked her brain to try and think of a way to save her friend from the evil Squirrel Legend... so she ran to the little cottage she had passed on her way in. It had that evil wolf (now reformed) that had eaten the grandmother in red riding hood. He racked his extraordinary brain and finally came up with a solution... "EUREKA," the wolf shouted! I've got it! He motioned to Froot Loop and whispered in her ear. "We have to zaP the Giant Squirrel to reverse the legend"... but froot loop had zaPped the giant squirrel before, or so she thought. She went out hunting for the giant squirrel the very next day, with her bestest friend in her backpack... Froot Loop knew there was only one thing to do: Find the Giant Squirrel and beg him to free her friend from the legend. And if that didn't work... then Froot Loop would have to destroy her friend. She couldnt have her making another evil squirrel colony. You might think this impossible since ALL the other squirrels were zaPped but theres always a way... So poor Froot Loop and her squirrelly best friend went in search of the Great Pumpkin to find the way to thwart the Giant Squirrel and get the best friend back to normal. The Great Pumpkin was filled with compassion for the poor little child and told Froot Loop... to zaPp the next mountainous thrankleberry she found and her friend would be back to normal. Now regular thrankleberries are so common, but the mountainous kind, those were rare, and Froot Loop... knew that the only place to find them was atop great Mount Moonshine. So off she and her best friend went to scale the mountain. It was very steep, but Froot Loop was in excellent physical condition. So when she got to the top... she had no problem spotting the thrankleberry (mountainous of course) and would have zaPped the darn thing except her dear little friend scrambled out of the back pack and ate it, as thrankleberries (the mountainous kind) are evil squirrels' favorite food... Froot Loop was devastated. How could she save her best friend now? Those rotten squirrels were going to take over the world and she couldn't stop them. BUT THEN, she had a brilliant idea. She gave her best friend some fragglien juice to make her throw up the thrankleberry... she waited while her squirrel friend retched in the bushed and changed back into human, but it turned out that this as the wrong squirrel... It was the original squirrel who had screeched at her! And she had turned him into the EVIL CP!!! That was enough to make Froot Loop very angry. She aimed her maJik spatula at CP and... zaPped his once squirrely ass. CP (whoever he is) was blown off the mountain by the force but being that he was a squirrel, he decided he as gonna be a flying squirrel and glided to the ground where he... landed next to Froot Loop's poor friend. The evil CP got some evil ideas, but Froot Loop could see him from atop Mount Moonshine so she got out her paragliderthingie and swooped down to where CP was about to strangle her friend and... landed on him. Now Froot Loop (as you said) was in top physical condition, so she drop-kicked the little wretch and grabbed her friend who was sniffing at a little spot of thrankleberry that had gotten on the evil one when he had thrown up but now was on the ground in front of her... so she quickly zaPped the thrankleberry remnant and her friend was immediately restored to human form. Now, as an interesting side effect of the zaPping of the mountainous thrankleberry that the Great Pumpkin had neglected to tell her, the Squirrel Empire was immediately COMBUSTED and the earth was free of them forever! Froot Loop and her best friend went on to become famous poets and heroes of the world for saving it from the clutches of the evil squirrels.

THE END