(-) If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
(-) Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.
(-) The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.
(-) Diet Tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
(-) A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?
(-) If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. BUT IF YOU CAN'T EAT ALL YOUR CHOCOLATE, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?????
(-) If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
(-) If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don't they actually counteract each other?
(-) Money talks. Chocolate sings.
(-) Chocolates have many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.
(-) Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocolate-alcoholics
Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.
(-) If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated.
(-) Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.