The 9 Types of Web Page Creators
Joe/Jane Average College Student
Traits : Owner of a new university supplied computer account with
http access. Complete lack of originality. Multiple references
to beer/Disney movies. Several photos of Student with college
buddies (high school, if freshman Student).
The Good News : They don't know how to get their page linked to
the outside world, so only they and their friends download their
16.7-million- color pictures from the last party.
The Bad News : They, their friends and their 16.7-million-color
pictures might be on your server.
Mr. "Enhanced For Netscape"
Traits : The second thing you see on his page is a Netscape logo
and a link to an ftp site where you can download Netscape
<BLINK>NOW!</BLINK>. The first thing you see is about 80
different <TITLE>s scrolling back and forth across your screen.
The Good News : You won't have to look at their pages for long,
because there won't be much there to see.
The Bad News : Half of the rest of the people who look at their
pages are going to think "Hey, that's cool!" and copy the
source.
The old-timer
Traits : Pages compatible with HTML 1.0, no graphics and very few
attribute tags. Normal-text-size message at top says "This page
not enhanced for Netscape. Cope, whipper-snapper."
The Good News : He's likely there because he has something of
importance to say.
The Bad News : Whatever it is will likely be boring or far too
technical for you.
The 5-Year-Old
Traits : Pictures of their parents, the family pet, etc. More
data about the daily life of a kindergartner than you thought
possible. Cute "kiddy talk" dialect to the text. <ADDRESS>
contains the note "such-and-such's mother helped her build this
page."
The Good News : The first few of these you see give you a warm,
fuzzy feeling.
The Bad News : The last few dozen of these you see all look the
same.
The Computer Science Major
Traits : Links to the linux FAQ, the Geek Code, Star Wars theme
music and DOOM .wad files. Cautious use of Netscape enhancements.
Picture of Darth Vader instead of personal pictures. HTML 3.0
(Beta) compliant seal-of-approval at bottom of her page.
The Good News : If you're a geek, you'll find what you're looking
for here. Even if you're not, you'll like the page design.
The Bad News : Complete lack of socially redeeming qualities.
Unfortunate tendency to upload specs of their home PC.
The Businessman
Traits : Pages without fancy backgrounds and with only one nice,
clean, image map. Unfortunately, there are no text links for those
using Lynx.
The Good News : You won't go blind staring at his pages.
The Bad News : You might wish you had once you see the prices of
the goods/services he's offering.
The Newbie
Traits : Very little created text on their pages, it's almost all
links to other people's pages. Missing right brackets in <A
HREF>s kill whole lines of information. Several image files are
not able to be loaded. <CENTER>.
The Good News : They'll almost have to get better.
The Bad News : They just might not.
The Egotist
Traits : Large image of themselves greets you when page is loading.
1/2 Meg .au file of him chatting with his dog. Access counts
shown for every page. Several lengthy pages devoted to his
compact disk/Magic card/beer bottle collection. More personal
details than you'd ever want to know.
The Good News : There isn't any.
The Bad News : Frequently friendly with Mr. "Enhanced for
Netscape."
The Maniac
Traits : Last counted 1267 .html files in his public_html
directory and 100+ CGI scripts in his cgi-bin directory. Is known
as a "Close Personal Friend of Bob [Allison]." Thinks the people
at Yahoo! "don't keep up with the Web fast enough." Will be the
first on his block to have an ethernet cable hardwired into his
brain.
The Good News : You could go through all his pages and never find
an error.
The Bad News : You'd never make it through all his pages.
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