Mark Twain
SAMUEL LANGHORNE CLEMENS
1835 - 1910
Born near Hannibal, Missouri
American humorist, writer, and lecturer who became famous worldwide with his novels, THE ADVENTURES OF TOM SAWYER (1876) and THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN (1884).
"Substitute 'damn' every time your're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be."
"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect."
"Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And ain't that a big enough majority in any town?"
THE ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN
And if you want more cynicism, read:
"LETTERS FROM THE EARTH"
"Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed." "The more I know about people, the better I like my dog."
"The past does repeat itself, but it rhymes."
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
"[The Bible] is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies."
LETTERS FROM THE EARTH
"I didn't have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead."
"I have never taken exercise except sleeping and resting."
POSTSCRIPT
"I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults of the first."
BENJAMIN FRANKLIN
NEXT AUTHOR PAGE = PAUL VERLAINE

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