Vaseline!

There's this guy who's in the market for a used motorcycle. Always wanted 
a nice big hog. So he's shopping around, answering ads in the newspaper, 
and not having much luck. One day he comes across a beautiful classic Harley 
with a "for sale" sign on it. Upon inspection, he is amazed to find the 
bike in mint condition. He inquires about it with the owner:

"This bike is beautiful! I'll take it. But you gotta tell me how you keep 
it in such good shape." 

"Well," says the seller, "it's pretty simple. Just make sure that if the 
bike is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It 
protects it from the rain. In fact, since you're buying the bike I won't 
need my tube of Vaseline anymore. Here, you can have it." 

So he hands the buyer a tube of Vaseline.

So the guy buys the bike and off he goes, a happy biker. He takes the 
bike over to show his girlfriend. She's ecstatic (being a Harley fan).

That night, he decides to ride the bike over to his girlfriend's parents' 
house. It's the first time he's going to meet them and figures it will make 
a big impression. When the couple gets to the house, the girlfriend grabs 
her boyfriend's arm.

"Honey," she says, "I gotta tell you something about my parents before we 
go in. When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the person who says 
anything during dinner has to do the dishes."

"No problem," he says. And in they go.

The boyfriend is astounded. Right smack in the middle of the living room 
is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the family room, another huge stack of 
dishes. Piled up the stairs, dirty dishes. In fact, everywhere he looks,
dirty dishes. They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

As dinner progresses, the boyfriend decides to take advantage of the situation. 
So he leans over and kisses his girlfriend. No one says a word. So he decides 
to reach over and fondle her breasts. He looks at her parents, but still they 
keep quiet.

So he stands up, grabs his girlfriend, strips her naked, and they make love 
right on the dinner table. Still, no one says a word.

"Her Mum's kinda cute", he thinks. 

So he grabs his girlfriend's Mum and has his way with her right there on 
the dinner table.

Again, total silence.

Then, a few raindrops hit the window and the boyfriend realizes it's starting 
to rain. He figures he'd better take care of the motorcycle, so he pulls the 
Vaseline from his pocket. 

Suddenly the father stands up and shouts: 

"All right, all right! I'll do the damn dishes."