We all know how Cinderella wanted to go to the ball but her wicked
stepmother wouldn't let her and then the fairy godmother pops up and gives
Cinderella some good news: The fairy godmother tells Cinderella that she
will provide for her everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on 2
conditions. Cinderella asks what she needs to do and the fairy godmother
replies, "First, you must wear a diaphragm." Cinderella's mouth drops open
and says, "You must be crazy! I'm on the pill, and I don't need to wear a
diaphragm." The fairy godmother reminds Cinderella about all the handsome
princes that will be attending the ball that night, and Cinderella agrees
to wear a diaphragm. "Well, what's the second condition?" Cinderella asked.
The fairy godmother replies, "You must be back home by 2:00 AM. Well,
Cinderella explains that if she's gonna go party with the princes, she wants to be out
all night long. The fairy godmother tells Cinderella that if she's not
home by 2AM, then her diaphragm will turn into a pumpkin and reminds her that at
least she'll be with the princes most of the evening, so Cinderella agrees
to be home at 2AM... At 2AM, Cinderella doesn't show up...3AM, no
Cinderella...4AM, no Cinderella...finally, at 5AM, Cinderella shows up at
the door with a huge grin on her face. The fairy godmother stands up and looks
at Cinderella and says, "Where the hell have you been? Your diaphragm was
supposed to turn into a pumpkin 3 hours ago!!!" Cinderella tells the fairy
godmother that she met a prince and he took care of it for her. The fairy
godmother wonders about a prince with this type of power and asks
Cinderella his name to which she replies, "I can't remember, but it was Peter Peter
something or other...."