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All of these where written within 1 year... enjoy




“To Santa”


Dear Santa Claus I know that I’ve been kinda bad this year
I know that I could have been better since last year is what I feared
I didn’t mean to cause trouble or hurt anyone that I knew
I’m writing this letter and I feel bad that I misbehave too
I can understand why I didn’t make a Christmas list to you
I didn’t mean to lie to Mommy, its just that I was in trouble
I kept the truth in the closet, didn’t want to burst the bubble
Wanted things to be ok, so a little white lie was in a good cause
I know looking back, losing respect from my mom was the cost
I’ve been punished, and I’ve been grounded for not believing in her
I’ve learn my lesson yet I still feel sad, but I’m not really sure
If I really deserve anything on this special Christmas holiday
Because I didn’t listen to daddy either in what he had to say
I was hurt, I didn’t want to hear what I did wrong so I ran away
Wanted to be by myself, and it was hurting me when I stayed
So if I don’t get nothing this year, my heart would really understand
I know that next Christmas I’ll try to be better, I know I can
I’m just a child that didn’t know better, and young, nevertheless
If I don’t get nothing just please give my parent a hug for forgiveness


“Your Heart”


In my life, I fear only death and nothing less
I accepted other things such as pain and the sadness
I have received love joy and the happiness
I take advantage of other things such thing I won’t confess
Dealt with participant I’ve encounter and all that I see
Sometime I go along with the flow, and other things just stop
Whether or not I admit to myself I rather it just be not
I am filled with feelings and yet it can soon disappear
I can no longer beat no more with only my single fear
I’m in the center of my life, where it all starts with me
Other things stay, some just forget and become a lost memory
I sometime cause myself to cry, and easily I can form a tear
I can merely stand in front of you, and know I’m not really here
I can hide and act a certain way, and it won’t be no bother
I let you think things are better when one thing is another
I’m scared to lose things, yet I can’t wait to get rid of some
I get high adrenaline but then sometimes I’m cold and numb
I’m inside and I’m surrounded by movements and emotions
I can lie to hide the truth, and show some strong devotion
I’m every bit and unique, and I’m always playing a special part
I am one with you, I’m one with me, I am your heart


“Her Comfort”


She lies awake at night, flashes of memories she once knew
Why a man sometimes hurt a heart when they don’t mean to
A prayer is said, a moment spent, while time just fly by
So she sits alone in the dark, knowing that she just can’t cry
Knowing no one can hurt her now, she’s by herself once again
She don’t want to be, so she uses things to comfort her poor soul
She once told me not to give up, she’s already given in to the pain
She look and stare at the wall, knowing inside her nothing change
She smiles with sincere, yet she still feel like she’s all alone
Can’t complain to the world outside, seeing her life is her own
So she tries to cry inside, hiding her pride, wanting to just die
Knowing she feels so alone, her comfort is to care for other things
She gains from what gives, finding the little joy in what it brings
She’s been through everything, and nothing can compare to her defeat
Though in the end she didn’t give up totally, just fell on her feet
Got back up and took the world by storm, and live another day
Push her memories aside, swallowed her pride in her own comfort way


“A Better Place”


Where you think no one can bother you, and silence is around you
Where you can think clearly and look back what you went through
A better place to be is sometime alone, just to look and reflect on us
While sometime things seem blurred, but the picture isn’t out of focus
Look within yourself and listen to your heart of those better days
So you walk alone, think alone, and just be alone in an isolated place
A time to feel what you are feeling, where’s there’s no distraction
Where there’s less chaos, and problems that can be part of the complication
I know that I can think better if the world wasn’t on my back
If I can just look at the whole picture and see what it really lacks
A place that’s better than in a crowded house where your mind goes blank
Where I can jot down my feeling on paper until my pen runs out of ink
Where I can reflect on my life and then focus on your side of the story
I’m not really selfish if I look at the problem and see what’s in it for me
I rather be happy then feeling like I’m empty, so I only choose the right path
I know that I can let the road close where I can sit alone with no smile or laugh
I hide into this dark cubbyhole and picture a state of mind I’m always in
And see how I can change my views, where I can believe I’m happy again
So until I can see clearly and smile at the vision of us being together
I can only see myself think in a lonely place where I can think better


“Her Place”


You’re afraid to feel love, or to recieve someone’s special attention
Scared to let go of the past you had knowing its really hard to mention
You fear saying I love you and just thinking that it’ll never be that part
Of giving someone’s everything they own just by giving their heart
Now you tend to say nothing but yet your eyes tells me what I knew
Persistent caring and loving affection to show what I’m going through
All I’m asking is that you understand that I can’t stop my feelings
I’m only hopeless when you look at me and understand the Card I’m dealing
Its written in the future where we are suppose to change what we have
Its only written in my heart that you have a place where its more than half
A whole undivided attention I have for you, the world seems to disappear
A soft hug squeezing tightly to show that I thank God that you are here
I fear only losing you, the complication are just obstacle we have to overcome
Would be more miserable being without you, and cry in the night of lonesome
A slow kiss on your lip to enjoy the moment when I’m looking at your beautiful face
A long passionate kiss on your lips to show that in my heart you have found a place
A gentle touch upon your cheek to make sure you’re real and you’re in my life
A smile on my face to make me realize I’m luckiest man alive to look into your eyes
Then I close my eyes and imagine how it would be if nothing stand in our way
Where the feelings inside me would show you how much you mean to me each day
The place in my heart where you’ve touched me with your wonderful presence
I can’t tell you what will lie in the future but that my heart is pretty much convince
That I would never hurt you, never mistreat your heart, and just be there for you
So I hold on to you so tight that I don’t want to let go of what I once knew
Where I’m not afraid of falling for someone and accept what I’ve been dealt
The Cards just finally told me to open up and realize how much I’ve felt
So I will just hold you in the middle of the night and kiss you on the cheek
Knowing that you are terrified to love someone, just realize with you I’m weak
I’m vulnerable and I’m hopeless yet I know how I feel just don’t want to lose you
So just know that the place where you are is sacre and that it doesn’t want to end this too


“The Storm”


She rescue me from the storm, and my roots are strengthen to love again
She saved me from the days of darkness where light shine on this man
When I am with her she bandage my wounds from the past of being hurt
She wraps the bruise of sadness and with her smile the healing sure works
Was waking up and dreaded to be alive, and wanted my heart to be sacrifice
I was wanting it to end, but she helped me when she came into my life
Saved me from the future, of what I thought would happen to me soon or later
Where I thought I would never feel like this, but I guess I was the one that save her
She said I saved her from what she thought was fine and was ok with it
Where she felt safe and happy, or was she afraid of not really admitting it
She said I rescued her, when all I wanted to do was to be the one she loved
Wanted to change what we had because my feel grew strong of the one I think of
Her past was troubled but she changing as days go by only for the better half
I’m saving something I adore being with of someone that makes me smile and laugh
Hear light whisper in the night, eyes of appreciation, and smiles of soft affection
She the reason the storm ended and the rainbow shine on her like a rainbow after the rain
She’s the treasure I keep close to my heart, and the past is lost with the aching pain
So I close my eyes, and if I saved her its because I just wanted to be with someone I love
And if she rescued me was her loving arms and warm smile because to be it was enough


“Fighting”


Quickly I drop my chin, as my heart sags to the ground
Nervously thinking what went wrong when confusion is around
Was it my imagination, did my eyes deceive me in what I saw
Knew how it would all played out, knew it was a restricted law
Never fight with your heart, denying it only become torture
Won’t be reveal but it always comes out soon in the future
It’s a useless battle when fighting your heart, only in due time
The truth will come out and then you have to make up your mind
Pushed it aside, ignoring what I knew was eventually hard to hide
Whether to tell you where I stand for me was really hard to decide
Understand it was only for the best so I keep this on the down low
No one will find out not even you, so no one will ever know
A fear of rejection, know you could of end up breaking my heart
So I took a step forward, think straight and I played it smart
Lying to myself, I’m lying to my heart, and eventually to you
World apart, no one will get hurt, if I make this lie seem to be true
So I stray away my feeling then I stopped and act sometime different
Thinking carefully the words I chosen, since it seem to be apparent
Fighting with my heart, and so I know what I have to choose
Cuz sooner or later, a lie will be revealed, so in the end I still lose


“What You Bring”


What you brought me and the thing you continuelly to bring
Wouldn’t really matter if I didn’t receive one important thing
The love you give, makes everything else you give mean something
And without it, in my heart would be empty and there would be nothing
When you come to me and bring a smile upon your pretty face
It completes my day, then I’m nervous and helpless into a daze
You’re shown that you can be happy and feel safe in your life
I can’t give you the world, but you enjoy at all my tries
You bring me your laughter, a sound of being happy with me
Make me smile to hear you, knowing inside my heart feels helplessly
Brought me a reason I can laugh in to the night, stare at the sky
Thank God that you came into my life, you’re the sparkle of my eye
You bring me the feeling of wanting to be ok, get settle down
Rearrange my life to yours, a wonderful person that I’m glad I found
You seem to be willing to care, bring a calm peace when I’m in your arm
Never thought I would feel so safe, and you bring me no harm
Time to let it go of the old, and with you comes with the new
My love, my compassion, and my understanding to what we got
Just hope that you’ll appreciate to whatever its I bring means a lot


‘War Zone”


Over and over, bashing in with the inflicted old pain
Wounded soul trying to survive, and try to live again
Damage control, now my heart beat at a steady rate
The ability to feel love, my heart can only anticipate
It’s a war zone and my soul has been injured this night
Can’t fight the memories when I held you really tight
Trying to stand tall, and be brave when I’m with others
Try to hold the memory close, because I know I still love her
She broke my heart, and se use me as a substitute for pain
Hurting someone else, made her feel she’s living again
She lied but I accepted that I’m the one that was always wrong
Why would I still love her, when I know that’s not where I belong
But she meant a lot to me, so I was hurt when she said goodbye
A little smile on her face knowing that she saw this man cry
Stomping on a battleground, I’m fighting the pain all on my own
Giving everything I’ve got, but I’ll die alone in her war zone
It made her feel strong and powerful that she had a control over me
Made me feel weak and vulnerable, something I didn’t want to be
Her pleasure to hurt someone when she’s been hurting all her life
Though I believe in her, I seen she was lying in those blue eyes
Give benefit of the doubt, because she was the one I love
Knowing I would of lost her in the first place, wouldn’t be so tough
She ply her game, and she had what she wanted, and be on top
While the loser watches her glow, only wishing the pain would stop
War zone of deadly tactics, she shot me and I bleed in fiercely pain
Over and over, the memory hurting, to get rid of it, its hard like stain


“Kill’n Time”


Kill’n time, sharpening the edge of my deep depth
Switching minds as I’m cherishing each of my last breath
Times a ticking and a chance I have to know what to do
Or a choice that I have to pay when all of this is through
Agony of defeat, why am I living this sad poor old life
No one care, no one loves me, a twinkle of a sharp edge knife
Pondering why I can’t and thinking why am I still living
When other keep on pushing when all I keep doing is giving
Appreciate my heart for it beats to love and not even hate
My life is dull so the thought of not living I contiplate
Sharp memories the days seems like it would never end
With a twitch, it’ll be over, and I’ll be gone, my friend
Sit and unrelax, but I become restless that I want to slice
Why am I’m hurting so much when I want love in my life
Time is kill’n me as I hold the sharp tool in my hand
If you have love me you’ll understand why you can’t stop my plan
So if I’m not happy than I’m not ok, so something is wrong
But lease remember that I am not love, so I’m just better off gone!


“A Sad Story”


My heart always feels a little pain, only because of the memories
Chapters of my life, a sad soul just happens to wander in stories
Don’t judge this book by my cover with rough little edges end
Been ruin pages of the mind, wish the heart didn’t comprehend
Safe to say that once upon a time, I felt peace within me
But as you read on, you’ll find out what my life came to be
Stranded at an abandon place, wanting for help or to see a sign
Wondering why I feel so hurt, many times I lose my mind
Can’t stop the sadness inside my lonely heart that hates to beat
No love to comfort it, so my life has always feel incomplete
I can try to erase the past, or act like I don’t even remember
It hurts worse when I do recall, so this is why I’m cold in December
So I picture the future so I can see my whole story soon unfold
Wish it would be a happy ending so my life isn’t shattered when told
Embarrass for the chapters of failure is a reminder of all the lost hope
I can’t win at love so the memories of young I only have to cope
They say lifes goes on, but the pages is just blank and unwritten
All my life being all alone, so in the future wouldn’t it be also fitting
The book of my life is sums up maybe in few or less sad line
If it wasn’t for disadvantage I would want you to only be mine
But you can close my heart, and forget what I just wrote
You can know how I feel and you can jot down all you notes
But you’ll won’t understand me completely even though you might
You can relate to my stories but only I know what I felt when I write
I’m an author of pain, and you read something of a repeated history
But the pain will always be a part of me til the end of my sad story


“Ugly”


I feel so unattractive, misplace parts upon my face
I think everyone would dislike my looks, in so many ways
Maybe I don’t have a nice smile that can brighten up someone’s day
Can’t stand to gaze into the mirror, so once in awhile I look away
I wish I was good looking but I’m just average is all that I see
Other outkast my appearance so obviously they must not like me
Maybe if I had nice eyes, someone would like to look into them
I can finally grab some attention and get notice too my problem
But I’m ugly, my smile and eyes aren’t not even good enough
Look doesn’t matter, but to me is why I think I’m not in love
You have to be attractive to have a person interested in you
Well I know what my face looks like, so now I’m hopeless too
I’m ugly and others sometimes don’t want to even get close
If I was a model or a rock star, I would look better, who knows?
Am I too sick to look at do I need to hide my unattractive face
Is this why I’m alone, why no one want to be in my place
Don’t you want to be my friend, I swear I won’t even touch
Can’t we just talk, don’t you know name calling hurt so much
I didn’t do nothing, I was born this way, and I’m really sorry
If it helps any, I’ll turn away so you won’t look at me, don’t worry
Its not your problem, just feels like my heart isn’t good enough
Is this why I’m alone, cuz I’m ugly, and just can’t be love


“When She’s Away”


She’s away from me, it tears me up inside when she doesn’t have to be
When silence fills the thin air, and the lonely and empty view is all I see
Sometimes I feel she ignores me, and she doesn’t pay no mind or attention
Where I wish she would just look at me, and say those words I often mention
Her mind is always pre-occupied and always busy with some other thing
When she’s away from me, my insecurity grows, and I’m always thinking
Always for the worse, I feel unsafe without her at the drop of a lonely tear
ThatI would see her walk away and realize that for awhile she won’t be here
I know that I would wish for her to come back right away and come back fast
Wish I could spend time with her and hold her while I get lost in her eyes
But see, I expect that, but its hard to accept that, so hear my lonely cries
I’m just terrible at waiting for her, every time I find her away from me
Because I rather hold her, she’s the reason I’m happy is the main key
Sometimes she doesn’t say much, and its hard to know how she real feel
When she tells me something secretive, I hush, for these lips are seal
It’s tough when I wish I knew what else she felt deep down inside
When I’m the open book you read, and my insecurity is the thing to hide
I act if I’m ok when she’s away, and then notice that I’m lost and sad
When she’s away and she has a chance to be with me that hurt worse
I don’t expect every single second of the day, but time away still hurts