Who the Backstreet Boys *Really* Are
 


Brian

Brian is practically the lead singer or the part-hogger of the group and he's so perfect that sometimes you wonder if he and his Keebler Elf face and melting blue eyes are for real.  They apparently are.  he tries to garner sympathy with that congenital heart defect that radio hosts use as BSB Trivia and no doubt, it's worked.  Just check out that Brian Littrell Foundation (or something along those lines).  Gospel Boy's also got some other condition that causes him to wave or say "Hello" very spontaneously and he loves pulling fish faces.  Rumor has it that he used to be a really short fish with gorgeous cheekbones in his previous life.  The root of his basketball obsession hasn't yet been found though but he does drag around a basketball like his life depended on it.  Call him B-Rok 'cause he'll "be rocking your house", not Gary Barlow.  Oh yeah, he used to make some mean hushpuppies too.


Nick

Part hogger #2 is Nick.  Or Nick-ay, as he probably loves calling himself in his ghetto-Ebonic way.  And all he has to do is give his crooked little smile before zillions of teenyboppers coming swarming.... and then he escapes with his bodyguard, Randy.  Ironic, ain't it?  He may be the youngest but he's the tallest at 6'2" and got the most fans, probably making all the other Boys jealous as hell.  Plus, the baggy clothes he wear... you could fit him and all his 5 sibs in there!  He still can't seem to figure out which way to wear that cool Kangol hat of his.  So far, he's only got it one way - wrong.  Brian and Nick are thistight and they mention is about 6368 times per interview that they, as Frick and Frack respectively, are each others' best friends on the road.  Don't worry, guys, we won't forget that!  It's either Brian being his best friend or his Nintendo.  The poor boy has an affair with that electronic thing, that probably sits on top of his Ebonics dictionary that should be burned, or at least hidden for an eternity.


AJ

This funkmeister goes through hair color changes an anerage of every 4.629 days.  So far, he's been a blond, a redhead, a bluehead (Papa Smurf), had yankable dreads, and a fro that gave him some height to his 5'10" frame.  He's the bad boy who's 3rd in line in terms of singing parts and he's just about the only one in the group who can pull off the rapping parts without sounding like a complete dufus (or "dufo").  No one can understand how he can live off Micky D's and still keep sooooo thin.  Which explains his nickname : Bone.  It's either that or the fact that he likes fast women.  He played Dopey in Snow White and the Seven Dwarves when he was 7.  Actually, he hasn't changed much since then.  He's still kinda a dwarf compared to Nick and Kevin and he's kinda a klutz.


Kevin

They sure love stealing parts and solos from poor Kevvy Kev and as big and old as he is, why does he let 'em?!  Maybe he could try scaring them away with those eyebrows he probably mows weekly.  It takes him about that long to complete a full sentence in his cute Kentucky accent, at the rate he t-a-l-k-s.  He acts like the big daddy in the group and


Howie

Howie's got gorgeous Latin looks but when it comes to those brown eyes, the right eye's perfectly normal and the left eye's suffering from a serious nervous twitch that causes him to wink with every word outta his mouth, including the 37543 "stuff like that"'s per sentence.  It's either that or he can't get his right eye to blink along with the left.  There's also something about his long noodle-like hair that could be mistaken for Ramen cup-o'-noodles.  At least he doesn't have those Jheri curls anymore!  Thank god for his 6-pack otherwise uncool is a word that would be associated with Howie A LOT!