This section is provided to answer questions about Charleston Lifestyles Club and concerns about the lifestyle choices this type of club provides. The questions come form people that have expressed concerns and questions after visiting our page. These questions are researched and answered as honestly and openly as possible. If you have any questions or concerns, don't be shy! Write to Charleston Lifestyles Questions.
What is Charleston Lifestyles? This is a club made up of couples that are interested in the "Swinger's Lifestyle". In these couples, both spouses have made the decision to engage in activities with other couples that explore sexual satisfaction in the manner agreed upon by all involved. We are not a phone sex or dating club. We invite male/female couples to join us. We do not condone abuse in any way, fashion, or form.
Does Charleston Lifestyles have club meetings? The club has just being started and built. We are scheduling several "planning meetings" that will be held at a local restaurant/club in order that the organization can be built properly. In the future we will have socials and house parties as a club with special themes and activities. If you would like to be involved in the planning stages, please email us at Charleston Lifestyles.
Just what is "Swinging"? There are about as many answers to this as there are couples involved with the lifestyle. Why? Because each couple has their own idea of what to expect from the lifestyle. And believe me...... that eaves a lot of room for a lot of answers. There are more couples involved than you would think. Below are a few general understandings of the lifestyle. Now if you hear them discussed you will know what they are referring to.
- Soft Swing: This type of swinging generally does not include sexual penetration of anyone other than your spouse. Masterbation, oral sex, toys, and fun are the general rules of thumb. Can be accomplished with two or more couples as the involved people prefer. You will find that a lot of women are bi-sexual or bi-curious.
- Swing: This type of swinging is generally entered into after you have been in the lifestyle for a bit or when you are extremely secure in your permenant relationship. Sexual penetration is accepted with someone other than your spouse. This also contains masterbation, oral sex, toys and fun play. Most women in this area are bi-sexual, but it is not a requirement. Whether or not a female is bi-sexual, just curious, or totally against the idea should be discussed prior to any encounter.
- Bondage and Domination (B&D): This has really been given a bad name by extremists. There are levels where this can be made fun and not go overboard with it. Many people have fantasies of being led around, told what to do, being blindfolded during sex. In other words...being submissive. Others have fantasies about being in control of things. Being the one to direct activities.... being Dominant. This is where it can be explored in fun. You can and will see this in both hard core and soft swing. Just be careful, be safe, and don't be abussive.
- Swapping: In this area you will find usually that neither female nor male is bi-sexual and do not wish to have a group encounter. It is strictly swapping spouses for the encounter. It can be in the same room or in different areas.
- Threesomes: here the choice of having an extra male or female in the encounter is your choice. Generally it is sex in all forms between three consenting people.
Are all of the women in swinging bi-sexual? The choice to be bi-sexual is a personal choice. It does not mean your weird to be bi-sexual or even to be curious. Through our research we have found that most women in the lifestyle enjoy being bi-sexual where the men do not. This is a question that needs to be discussed openly before an encounter with another couple.
What should we do when we find a couple we are interested in? It is best to exchange information whether by phone or by email before you meet in person. Be sure that you send pics or information to explain your likes, dislikes, what you look like, ages, smokers...non-smokers, and so on. Then if you decide to meet in person choose a neutral location such as a small club or restaurant so that you can talk and enjoy each other without pressure. Where you go from there is your own business. Just be careful and be safe! Never take the same car with the couple you are agreeing to meet. Take your own in case things don't work out. You must have a way to leave.
I am so nervous about meeting others. Is this normal? This is very normal. Everyone involved in nervous at a first meeting. Hopefully there is one of the people that can carry a conversation well. It can be difficult to get conversations going when you first meet. After you have been together a bit, it tends to ease and get more comfortable. Just remember that you are all there for the same reason and probably have some of the same questions about the others. Talk openly. Don't drink too much alcohol for very obvious reasons!
What do I do if I want to introduce my partner to swinging? First and foremost you must have an open enough relationship to be able to discuss this type thing with your partner. It is VERY important that before you even entertain the idea of this type lifestyle that you discuss it fully with your partner. It can be both enjoyable as well as tune you in on each others desires. You must be very secure in your relationship in order that he/she not think that you are just looking for a way to fool around and them know about it or you may be looking for a way to replace them. This MUST BE a MUTUAL decision. If your partner is not interested then you shouldn't be either! Never force nor surprise a partner with this idea.
What kind of people do you find in a Swingers Club? Swingers come in all shapes and sizes. They come from all walks of life and income levels. You would probably be very surprised to know who all are involved in the Swing community.
What should we expect from a social or house party? Be prepared for a more open environment than you have probably ever been in before. It is really quite exhilerating. Women have a tendency to loose outerwear from time to time. Especially when there is a theme party of sexy lingerie! Socials and house parties are usually open or by invitation. Either way you will be expected to either bring a covered dish/snack and BYOB. There will be times that this will be replaced with an addmission fee to cover expenses. It is up to the hosts.
- Club Social: Usually held at a hotel/motel in a group room where dancing and such takes place. You are invited to secure your own overnight room so that you do not drink and drive or you can enjoy the lifestyle. Your choice! This would be under the heading of carrying an addmission fee and orientation prior to going to the social. Outerwear and/or coverup is required for anywhere else other than the social room. These activities will be publicized in order that as many as possible may attend.
- House Party: This is usually by invitation. It can either be held at a couples home or at another location where several couples are invited to attend. It depends on how many and how experienced the couples are whether or not a discussion or orientation should take place. If not all of the couples know each other it is best to have a get aquainted time prior to real party activities. If you would like to have a house party and would like for us to announce it....we would be glad to do so. It is best to have an R.S.V.P. policy in order to know how many people to plan on as far as space.
If you have any questions that you would like us to answer for you, please write to Charleston Lifestyles
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