If you are obsessive complusive:
If you are co-dependent:
If you have multiple personalities:
If you are paranoid delusional:
If you are Schizophrenic:
If you are depressed:
Please press 1 repeatedly, now.
Please ask someone to press 2, now.
Please press 3, 4, 5 and 6, now.
We know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call!
Listen very carefully...a small voice will tell you which number to press.
It doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.