My Poetry
Here is my stuff....
Would anyone care
Would
anyone care if I was gone? For good?
Would anyone care if I left the world or at least this area?
Would anyone care if my life were not around?
Would anyone care if I cried myself to death?
Would anyone one care if I fell asleep and never woke up?
Would you?
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My future......
I'm so
lonely I wish I had someone who cared for me.
Who was there for me. I have discovered that I miss having
someone
whom can talk to me and me alone for awhile. I miss the comfort
and the
closeness. I miss someone being there for me first. It might
sound greedy but
I have discovered I miss it. I wish for someone but it will never
happen.
Solo is the only way for me.
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Endless
The days
you want to cry are the worst
They seem to never end. They seem to drag on forever.
the tears you want to pour are an endless river.
The hurt you feel does not seem to end.
The answers to your questions never come.
Thje questions never stop. It is a never endless cycle.
It drags on and will never end. Forever more.
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Kill.......Self
I want to
stab you in the head and watch you bleed
I want to see your veins burst like broken dams
I want to make your skin shredded like string meat
I want to I want to crush your eyes liek wineries crush grapes
I want to burn you alive and then saw you into pieces.
Because your name is...........self
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Missed Path
I miss you
when you leave me
I miss you when you are gone
I miss you when things get messed up
But I know things will never be the way
I would like them to be. For life has
drawn a map for us never to be on th same path.
You are a ray of sunshine in a world of darkness.
I wish things would be different but I would rather
have you in my world than gone forever.
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Overlooked
Why do I
always get overlooked, not taken for real, passed over for
something supposedly better
Why do I feel unappreciated. I try hard to do what i can but I
can only do what I can. I only seem
to be filling time until somthing better comes along. Why do I
feel like I am always in the way or an outsider.
For I want to be someone who is considered first and someone
people are glad to be with. Not the one that fills in the gaps.
But never shall it be. For I wish to be the first choice instead
of the backup to the backup. Why am I the one always ovrelooked.
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Nothingness
For mine
my life is at a dead end. Direction I have no where to go. Why I
cannot be more what people like, love, want, I do not know. I
have no knowledge
of any way to be of any use to anyone. I feel like nothing coz I
can do nothing for anyone
I feel useless. I wonder why people want me around. Why they
bother with me. I haev nothing to offer
It is just useless. I should move to the woods and become a
hermit. Forever to make people miserable.
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My New Fear
I have
discovered when it boils down to it, I do have one fear. Never
having a real fear
it is something I do not know what to do with or about. Something
that I have grown to have
without realizing. Something that shows I have a "chip"
in the armor. Something I can't avoid or
make go away. My New Fear is something that has been staying with
me and it won't go away.
I do not know how to get rid of this kind of fear. God forbid it
come to realitycoz I hav no idea how to surpass it.
Man I am in trouble with this new fear.
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Ode to Prince........
Everyone
get down, LET'S GO CRAZY, party like its 1999 while we drive in
the LIL RED CORVETTE.
You can wear the RASPBERRY BERET that you love so much. You know
I am down wth you coz IF I WAS YOUR GIRLFRIEND, we would be
joined at the hip. When the PURPLE RAIN falls, it is all about
the replenishing of the soul.
I hope you TAKE ME WITH YOU and we go places where no one will
ever find us. Baby I WOULD DIE 4 U and that would be WHEN DOVES
CRY. BABY, I'M A STAR because of you but would be COMPUTER BLUE
if you left me.
We would be SCANDALOUS. After all U MAKE MY SUN SHINE.
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Questions of the mind 7/11/04
As I walk
through the my life, I find many things along the side. Broken
Dreams,
broken lives, lost hearts, lost loves. I wonder why it is to be
that love is so complicated.
It should be simple. It should be just like living life. But all
I see are the pieces of hearts
from people's past. I wonder why those who are damaged so much
keep seeking out the same thing
Is it fear of loneliness? Is it fear of being forgotten? I wonder
why some make love so hard.
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The Sea of Dread 7/10/04
Where for
thou is the one whom I shall call upon to save me?
Drowning on the sea of dread. There shall be no one to save me,
to even throw me a life preserver. I shall be doomed to eternally
wallow on the depth
not dead but just forever churning in the sea of dread. Ths is my
destiny. This is my end
to never but forevre churning.
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Find the Flame 7/10/04
Find Me,
Find where I have fallen
The dark recesses of life have lost me and I do not know where
I have been led to. The light I once had has been extinguished by
one who
was the keeper of the flame. Now I dwell in darkness nevre to
have
the flame brightened again. Can I be found? Can I be lifted?
Only the one whose destiny it is can be the cause of this.
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Never again 7/06/04
Never
again shall the light of day enter my realm
Having been banished from human existance
I am destined to live among the edges, known only to those
fellow lepers whom have been duly banished
Why have I been given this destiny?
That is for those whom detemine the hands of fate to know
and for I live. Never again shall I live among the life dwellers
For my doomed life only shall bring pain and suffering.
For all the more of time. Only to be relieved by death
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Forever Doomed 7/06/04
Forever
Doomed to live a life of solitude
to never enter the realm of light and enjoy the pleasures of
persons unknown
My destiny states that my existence is determined to be one of a
lone wolf
Always seeking others but never finding anyone.
Forever Doomed to seek solace but never find peace of mind
Finding some peace only in the deaht of my body but
never in the life of my soul.
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Reality 9/12 posted 8/6/02
Reality has a way
of snapping us back
To think that what happens in one city does not
matter to you is absurd. If you have the idea we are an island
unto ourselves, then you are dead wrong.
Life makes a duty of taking your comforted life and slapping you
back down.
Never underestimate the power of reality, the pull of life or
father time.
Life as we know it will never been the same.
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The chain 8/15 posted 8/6/02
The depth of your
soul determines your humanity to fellow man
Your lack of a soul detemines the evil within
Your mind determines the control over both
Your emotions create the outlet for the mind
Your actions determine the judgement of the emotions
You determine the truth in your actions .
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Why? 9/12 posted 12/7/01
Senseless violence
makes one ask why
Nameless faces makes one wonder whom.
Tragedy makes one wonder for what good reason.
The answers are not too easy to find sometimes.
However, they are there.
The answers give is reasons, even though sometimes those
reasons still do not answer the one question nor heal the hurt.
Why? The question that will be uttered and answered but
will have no effect of the healing
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Path of Life 7/1 posted 12/7/01
The clouds thicken
as the grey rains comes
They bring the faint scent of ominous events.
What will happen, what will go on. No one knows
The only way to know is to let destiny run it's course.
The sky cast a shadow over the land and the people cast
a shadow over their thoughts. What will happen, what will go on
no knows. You just have to let fate's hand issue the verdict for
the time.
Life is not a known commodity. As much as you try to direct your
path,
there will always be things to throw you. It is how you deal
with these obstacles that create the strength you succeed or fail
with.
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Dream Away 3/12 posted 12.7.01
When you dream you
dream of the good things
Money fame, fortune, beauty
Dream Away
When you dream you dream of the things you want
Love passion desire
Dream Away
When you dream dream of the things you like
People places things
Dream Away
For our dreams are what no one can take from us
Our dreams keep us alive and
If we try hard enough our dreams come true
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Dark Side 3/14 posted 12/7/01
Passion is my love,
people I enjoy
but I have a dark side
Happiness is what I seek, Success I strive for
but I have a dark side
Fortune I hope for, Ambition I have
but I have a dark side
Love I seek, Affection I adore
but I have a dark side
What is the dark side in me?
It is the one that says you are not worthy
You have no reason for happiness
The dark side tells me your life is boring
Directionless. Does that stop me?
No but it does hamper myself.
All I can do is fight the dark side
To the end.
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To the victims of 9/11 - 9/12/01
You are in
your thoughts and minds.
If you were a survivor, our wishes are with you
Our thoughts for healing are hopeful for you.
For those whom passed, our emotions mourn you
Our tears are dedicated to you. Our sorrow is with you.
For those whom are victims of any other way, our minds are here
for you
our arms are around you and our words need not be spoken.
In fact, this has made us all a victim of some sort,
whether be it a loss of a friend or family or the loss of
security
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Dark Edge 4/8 posted 8/24/01
We all try our ebst
for happy lives.
We all try to love and be loved
We all make the effort to do the right thing in our lives
However despite all these efforts, \par we all have the Dark Edge
We all try to deny it, to suppress it to control it \par But we
eventually discover it
The question is what do we do with it?
Do we let it consume us and indulge in the dark edge?
Do we let it dwell jsut under the surface suing it only in dire
need?
Do we try to keep it out of our being?
The idea of the dark edges excites and scares all.
You decide for yourself where the Dark Edges will live.
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Wondering 8/23 posted 8/24/01
Have you ever
wondered why people seek deep intimate relationships?
Is it the fact that some people feel a hole in their lives?
Is it the fact that they fear growing old alone?
Is it the fact that they are brought that that is a goal of life?
Have you ever wondered why the best relationships are among
friends?
Is is true that friends are the best option since the hear is not
invested and there is no fear of collision?
Have you ever wondered the depths people will go to have a
significant other?
Have you ever wondered if your best friend is actually the best
relationship you will ever have?
Have you ever wondered if that is all you would need to begin
with?
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Time 5/14 posted 7/22.01
Time waits for no
one
Time makes amends to no one.
Time creates chances and takes them away.
The idea of time draws everyone to the realization
our time is short in comparison to the how the time of existence
is
When we are gone, time goes on and we are but a trivial
existance.
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Soul Spirit 3/24 posted 7/22/01
The skies open, the
rain falls
The Thunder rumbles and the lightning strikes
Why? This is the mourning of a lost soul.
The passing of one into the realm of the inbetween.
THe spirit is guided from the world of the living to the
realm of the in between. When the storms rush through,
that tells me the soul is in much turmoil. Only
when the rainbow appears can that say that the soul is now a
spirit.
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Our Hope 2/23 posted 4/14/01
Sitting on top of
the edge of the world staring down,
I see a mix of love and hate. I see the pain and suffering
and wonder how we can survive the strife that lives. But then
I see her and everything fades. The pain escapes and the
suffering ends.
Perhaps it was just my own pain. None the matter, she is my
Hope, my joy, my light. She is the world and I am her human.
In the world of Pandors's Box, she is hope. The depth of her soul
is the center of the universe. The level of her being is the core
of my existence. When she reaches out,
the world reaches for her.
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Fate 2/23 posted 4/14/01
The rain and wind
howl. The dark city is wet
with the stench of foulness. The storm clouds overhead
Bear the ominous mood of the city. The sirens are heard.
The cries sound the pain of the people. Who is causing the pain?
Tis the dark hand of fate. Fate is the thing the lives and die
with us.
Fate drives us and leads us. Fate gives us life and kills us. The
twisted souls we are handed
are the ones live with every day.
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Dark Destiny 2/17 psoted 3/26/01
Where does life
lead us?
Where do we go?
Do we lead to the white light we are told to?
Or do we take the dark path that we see?
The choice is ours but affected
By our life experience.
Therefore, whether we choose the
Light or the Dark, we make that choice.
How we implement that choice will affect how
Our lives will be.
Our goals, aspirations, dreams are all
Affected by our choice. Look inside
To see your path.
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Crow 2/17 posted 3/26/01
As the sky clears,
The crow soars to his perch atop
The trees. He stands looking over
The Blue sky. The sun casts a light
Over the land. The warmth of the glow seems
To bring out life. The crow, however,
does not see this. Some believe the crow
carries lost souls whom ahve unfinished
business. Does the crow carry someone
I know? Does the crow carry someone you know?
Neither of us shall know for the crow
Chooses not to speak.
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One....Two 2/7 posted 3/10/01
One person makes life.
Two people make living.
Together as we stroll along the
the path of life.
We fight all obstacles together.
We unite to make our lives
and those around us better.
Tis a beter to have fallen in love and lost
then not ever know love
Wihtout love one goes through
without emotion. Without emotion life is robotic.
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Spring Love 1/27 posted 3/10/01
Spring brings new days
Spring brings new beginnings
Flowers bloom, animals awake
People get out and associate
The sun lightens the way
as the rain makes thigns bloom
Love grows all for you
Hearts quicken as two people
Come together sharing each love.
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Deep Passion 1/20 posted 3/3/01
Give me your hand and Il'll
take you away
To a place where love grow without delay
Your company I pleasure, your love I treasure
When I look into your eyes I see my light
I wonder how my world would be without you.
I wonder how our future will be together
Shouting from the highest monutain to
the lowest valley for all the world to hear
No matter where I go, you live inside of me
My heart beats for you. my soul lives for you.
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Loss 1/18 posted 3/3/01
Loss, whether be it a
friend, lover or family,
hurts. Whether that person passes or leaves your life, it hurts
Loss is only healed by time. Loss is one of life's little
realities.
Loss varies in the degree of pain. It can range from mild to much
painful, causing one to fear falling in love or venturing out.
Loss is the one thing we cannot change but we can learn from it.
Especially if we can learn a positive lesson that will help
in the next step of life.
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Seek and Ye shall find 12/10 psoted 2/23/01
Seek and ye shall find what
you are looking for
It may take time. It may takes months or years
But be patient and do not settle for what's on the vine.
Do not settle for Mr/Mrs Right Now
For doing that will only create a distraction and put you in a
bind.
Seek and Ye shall find all in due time.
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Wish 2/7 posted 2/23/01
I see your sadness in your
tears.
I wish I could kiss them away.
I see the hurt in your eyes.
I wish to kiss your tears away.
I hope I bring you comfort and relief.
Your sadness makes me sad too.
I hope my hugs will ease your pain.
I hope my love will help your burden.
When you get down, I hope you think of me.
I think of you and wish to be with you always.
You are the sunshine of my life.
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Dark Angel 2/10 posted 2/23/01
I am walking in the rain,
A thunderstorm. Cutting alleys
and short paths. Thinking what
lies in the future for me. What love
has in store for me. I think possibly
my time has gone for love. Then I hear a sound and stop.
A streetlight illuminates the side of a building.
I hear a whispering,a voice perhaps.
The voice says "I am with you"
I turn toward it but nothing.
I turn toward the lit wall and see a shadow
that stands tall. I hear again,
"I am with you". I turn again to see the voice
but it is gone. Who is it that speaks?
Who is it that seeks me? \par The Dark Angel seeks me.
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Valentines 2/14/ posted 2/15/01
Valentines is not
the greetings cards, the merchandise in the store or the sales
they have.
It is the love between two people. You do not get the person a
card because you have to.
You do it because you like them and value their friendship. You
do it coz you value their love.
Valentines is every day in reality. It is the surprise rose on
the work desk. It is the card of I
love you in the book bag/briefcase. It is the little love notes
on the fridge. Valentines gives
us a day to make suer we do this but we should do all of this all
the time. The red is a color of
passion and pain. Sometimes the two mix. But love is any color
you wish it to be. Love knows no
color. Love know no bounds. Love knows no time. Love only knows
the emotions and heart poured in
by two people. Love is not chains that shackle. Love is the
string that loosely holds together
able to be broken at anytime but never broken because of love.
Love is the words that flow freely
without need for prompting. Love is the actions you show every
day. Love is love regardless of
the day. Love your family, friends, and your special one. For
time can make you regret not doing
it.
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Whose to say 1/11 psoted 2/15/01
Hearts are made for love
Hearts are made for pain.
Whose to say they are not one and the same.
Love, pain it is all in the game of life.
Fear, Strength are two pawns in the deck of life.
Whose to say that the cards are not fixed.
Lies, truth is it all the same words.
Time is your best friend, time is your worst enemy.
Money, power we all end up in the ground.
Whose to say that you are better than me.
Friend, enemy they both get you in the end.
Family, stranger trust is nothing
Whose to say that you know either.
Sex, love are the same and different
God, Devil they feel no different
Whose to say one is better than the other.
They say times heals all wounds
But is that the truth?
Whose to say they do not lie.
The heart feels no pain, the heart feels all pain.
Love feels good, Love hurts bad.
Whose to say I do not feel the pain.
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Ode to a Wall 1/14 posted 2/5/01
Wall, you wall Someome had
decorated you in a nature scene
Which to me is an oddity. Anyone care to lend me a museum piece?
Wall, you wall. I wish the fools had not decorated you
and made you into scene of rot. Now I do not know what to do
for you have I have not a clue. I shall work aroud you
and think maybe blue? Wall you wall, One day you will peel and
then
youll get to feel how tough it is to deal.
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Come with me 1/27 posted 2/5/01
Give me your hand and I'll
take you far away
To a place where love grow without delay.
Your company I pleasure, your love I treasure
When I look in your eyes, I see my light
I wonder how my world would be without you.
I wonder how our future will be together.
Shoutting from the highest mountain to
the lowest valley for all the world to hear.
No matter where I go, your love is inside of me.
My heart beats for you, my soul lives for you.
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The butterfly 1/16 posted 1/27/01
A butterfly starts in a
cocoon and grows. It spins a wonderful web of silk and beauty.
The beauty continues into the development of a very colorful and
lovely design. The butterfly breaks out of the cocoon and begins
its journey to where it goes. Does it make it? Perhaps Does it
perish? Perhaps. But for all the beauty it is a lonely soul
flying around looking for the hopes and dreams it seeks. Will it
find it?
Who knows but in the very least it will die trying.
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Dedication 1/9 posted 1/27/01
We are have something we
are dedicated to.
Whether we dedicate ourselves to our careers or our loves,
it instills in us a desire to do our best. We can love with our
passions. We can truly be dedicate to more than one thing. This
\par is how we try to live our lives. But we must be careful to
not
stretch ourselves too thin and thus lose our dedication. Always
keep in mind dedication is truly a honorable quality
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Pain 12/27 posted 1/27/01
My pain is sad. I feel the
loneliness. I feel the hurt.
I want to give myself to someone but no one seems to want me.
My life has gotten to a point where I am willing to me with
someone.
But no one seems to want me. I feel the pain. My heart hurts. I
ask myself why am I so lonely now?
It is because I left myself too wide open. The one thing that
helped me is the one that had hurt me. Lately I wonder if anyone
will ever love me. The raven flies in peace, the water runs in
silemce but my heart
aches with pain for the one I really care about. I hope one day
she will see I am good enough to open her life to, to give
herself a chance to join me. But, alas I fear it may never happen
for my soul is scarred and healing is hard.
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The four elements 12/31 posted 1/18/01
The four elments of life
consists of:
Earth - The solid foundation from which we all draw our final
resting place.
Wind - The breeze that we feel when one's past soul is talking to
us.
Fire - The heat that is generated to create some life forces and
destroy others.
Water - The susbtance that we need to sustain our physical being.
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How 12/31 posted 1/18/01
How do I make through the
night..
My heart cries, my soul hurts
I feel my emotions draining.
A verse goes "leave like bleeding in my hands"
That describes this night. Being alone is one thing.
Being lonely is another. How do I make through this night?
Do I just suffer? Do I self medicate? Do I put myself to sleep?
Tell me me how do I make through the night.
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We all find it 1/07 posted 1/11/01
We all find it.
What it is depends in your search.
Love, fame fortune, it all can be found within yourself.
How is up to you. We all find the way to create our own little
worlds.
Whether it is true or imagined, it is the place we go when we try
to
Get away from the world. When we try to escape, the reality hits
us.
That is when we need to find strength within to make it.
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Insignificant 12/31 posted 1/11/01
If I were to get hurt, no
one would heal.
If I were to suffer, no one would hear my cries.
If I were to be sad, no one would cheer me up.
If I were to cry, no one would wipe away my tears.
If I were to lose, everyone wins.
If I were to fall, no one would catch me.
If I were to die, no one would shed a tear.
Why? Because no one cares. No one wants to care
Why? Because I am Insignificant.
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She 12/23 posted 1/5/01
She walks softly in the
darkness.
She flows like a lost breeze. Her gentle demeanor
Reflects the quiet manner in which she lives here life with.
But do not mistake that for being bland. For inside
Lies a Passion that is waiting to come out for the right person.
She has been hurt times before but she still holds out hope.
The love she can give is true, the life she leads is her own.
She glides across the room toward the one she loves. Could it be
me?
I would be so lucky. She has her love all for herself .
She walks into the light with her love shining bright.
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The Rock 12/31 posted 1/5/01
I stand up on the rock of
life.
I see nothing but wide open spaces.
In the distance I see another rock with
someone else. Is it my true love
or a mirage? I do not know.
I begin step down and walk toward the rock.
Then things that I never saw before appear.
Obstacles that are huge. Mountains, oceans and
Deserts. But I march on. Nothing can stop me from my true love.
I climb the mountains, with breath to spare.
I swim the oceans, fighting off the attacking predators.
I walk the desert fighting off the lack of water.
I arrive at where my true love is. Alas
no one is there. It was a mirage.
Thus I am at the rock again.
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Miss 12/13 posted 12/29/00
When you walk away, I miss
you
When you hang up, I miss you.
When you go to work, I miss you.
When you go to school, I miss you.
When you look in my direction,
I look at you and see the love that
burns inside of me. The passion that makes
me wanna be with you anytime.
The love that brings my mind to a stop.
When you come to me, the world is right.
Nothing can end the feeling. Pain may happen and hurt
may occur but the love in there in there somewhere.
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Adrift on a mind cloud 12/15 posted 12/29/00
Adrift on a mind cloud, I
fly around...
I see one cloud and see peace and harmony.
I fly around to another and see strife.
The clouds seem to blend in colors. Red, Blue,
White and other colors. Each color represents
an emotion. What do the colors represent to you?
Tell the world, tell yourself.
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Empty 12/21 posted 12/23/00
My soul feels empty, my
mind is hollow.
I feel as if I will never follow anyone
To the land of happiness. I feel the sea of love
Is something I shall never experience.
Empty is the feeling I get when I see the
Love between two people but I feel that no one
will love me in that way. Empty is the idea I get when people
Think of me as a soulmate.
I think what about me? What about me?
But then I realize, I am not
Good enough for passion. Perhaps
I am not destined for love. Perhaps
Love is not for me. Where do I find the answers?
I do not know.
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Lost time 11/13 posted 12/23/00
Lost time is something that
we all regret.
Whether it be lost in pain or in love, we do lose time.
Lost time is the only factor irreplaceable in the annals of life.
Since we cannot turn back the hands of time,
we cannot reclaim lost time.
Lost time is gone forever.
A time machine would not make lost time replaceable.
Lovers lose time in quarrels.
Families lose time in problems.
In the end, we all lose to Father Time.
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Love Jones 12/7 posted 12/19/00
When you feel the need to
call that person at 5 am
but not to come over, just to talk, that is a love jones.
When you want to see that person more than make money
or hang with the posse, that is a love jones.
When you feel nothing can conquer your feelings
despite what they do, that is a love jones.
When you feel sad because they have to go away
that is a love jones.
When you want to be there on the bed and not just have to have
sexual relations, that is a love jones.
When your write things only for them,
that is a love jones.
When the thought of them keeps you from
really concentrating on anything else any time of day,
that is a love jones.
A real Love Jones is not only sexual.
That is only a part of the need. But the love jones
means you are willing to try anything with them.
But express your fears before and after and know
they will feel your fears.
That my reader, is a love jones
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The Seed 12/13 posted 12/19/00
We plant the seed.
What will come up?
Will it be the sweet smell of love?
Will it be the the nice texture of friendship?
Will it be gentleness of relationship?
Or the sour berry of disdain?
Whatever comes up,
if you do not plan the seed it will not start
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Sometime 12/5 posted 12/14/00
Sometime, it matters what you say, what
you do.
The little things make the biggest difference.
Whether be it, the surprise bottle of champagne for no reason
Or the bouquet of flowers at work on no occasion.
Sometimes the difference is not in the gift but the thought
behind it.
Sometimes, the hand of the loved or the touch of sympathy
Is enough to tame the wild beast.
Sometimes in the end, the best time is the quiet time in the end.
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How to tell where you are going 12/8 posted 12/14/00
Find the location you want to end up.
Search for the directions to the location.
Gather the roads that lead to the location.
Sort the obstacles to the location.
Go out and seek the actual route ot the location.
Make you way along the chosen path to the location.
Stop at the location.
You are at the location.
This is how to tell where you are going.
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Verses 11/13 posted 12/7/00
Verses can flow like wine.
Verses can run like water.
It is a matter of how one takes it.
Verses can create depth or cause pain.
Which verses are these that run through my mind?
That I cannot answer. My verses have intricate details.
Sometimes I have no idea what they really mean.
But verses can flow like wine.
But verses can run like water.
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Truth 11/13 posted 12/7/00
We all believe in the truth.
But how many actually use the truth.
We say little white lies do not hurt.
But is that truthful or wishful thinking.
The truth shall set your free they say.
But can it repair the damage done?
Some people even lie to themselves.
But are they really lying or is just their version of the truth?
Who speaks the truth? The general public or the one person who
disagrees?
What is the truth? Do we all have different truths or are there
certain truths we all have.