----- Chapter Seventeen -----

"None of your business," Sean growls. Abs reaches back and grabs me.

"This…is my bestest friend in the whole world!" he announces, putting an arm round me, "We've known each other since I was…" he holds his finger and thumb a little way apart, "…this big. And, as most of our hardcore fans will know, she comes almost everywhere with me!"

"Ok…" the interviewer murmurs, scribbling in her notebook frantically, "And…?" she gestures towards Marie.

"That would be my good friend Marie," I explain.

"Oh," the interviewer says with an obviously disappointed air, a little annoyed that we're not any of the boys' girlfriends or anything. She flicks through a list of questions, "Abs. Are you still with Danielle?"

"Yup. I sure am…" he grins and I detach myself from him to rejoin Marie, Rob and Mick.

"What about you other guys?"

"I'm still with Billie," Ritchie says.

"I'm seeing someone…sort of…" Sean admits vaguely.

"I'm still looking…" J adds. Scott sits there silently. The interviewer raises her eyebrows.

"Scott? How about you?"

He shrugs, "I did have a girlfriend - Kerry - but that’s pretty much over now," he pauses, "There is someone I would like to get to know better, though," he steals a glance at Marie and smiles.

"Scott. How did you get that rather nasty looking cut?" the interviewer ploughs ahead. A hush falls on the room.

"I did it," J volunteers, "I thought he needed an image change so I hacked up his face with a knife…"

"No it was a big dog that attacked him," Rich decides. I laugh at how close he is; "It was all teeth and slobber…" he does his best dog growl, "Honest! I saw it."

"No Rich…that was you looking in the mirror in the morning," Abs jokes. Ritchie plays sulking while Scott laughs and takes a deep breath to give his version of events.

"Noooo…it was none of those. What it was, well everyone knows that most of the time I'm not actually a part of this world. So, what is was, aliens came to visit and take me back to my home planet. So before they could take me back, they had to run a few tests. Like they had to have a look in my head…"

"…to see if he has a brain," Abs interrupts.

"…to see if I have a brain, right…"

"…and he failed. The cut's from the test but he failed cos he doesn’t have much of a brain - so the aliens dumped him back in Essex…" Rich elaborates.

"It was Ritchie - he tried to eat Scott!" J claims, then whispers, "And that is the truth!"

"No I did not!" Rich cries indignantly, punching J. It soon escalates into a full-blown play fight, involving cushions and basically anything that comes to hand. The interviewer sits there, not looking very amused that her interview has been stopped. In the end, Rob has to call order, explaining that it's time to go. And so the interview finishes.