----- Chapter Four -----

An hour later and we're sitting on my bed, talking. I'm almost totally relaxed and comfortable, even though I've only just decided that Abs is the most perfect guy I've ever met. We've been in this situation plenty of times, just talking, spending the night together…but not in that way, obviously. Snuggled up together and talking: yes. Anything else: no.

Tonight, among other things, Abs has decided to discuss my least favourite topic - Danielle. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I'm not some insanely jealous bitch or something. (Although I can't be too sure of my earlier motives due to my recent realisation.) But, anywayz, I liked Danielle okay until she started messing around on Abs and treating him like shit. He love(s/d) her so much that he'd put up with anything from her. In the end, they split up. It wasn’t that long ago, only around a month and a half, two months ago. I'm not sure what made them split up but I'm pretty sure it wasn’t Abs' doing and that Danielle decided to call it a day.

So here Abs is, pouring his heart out to me and getting all emotional. He still hasn’t told me what the final straw was, so I can't really offer any advice. I don’t even know if he knew that she was cheating on him. I'm not gonna risk it.

"What's going on with you then?" he asks me, seemingly all of a sudden. I can't be too sure cos I'm not listening word for word and I'm kinda deeply involved in my own thoughts. I'm savouring the moment - being here in Abs' arms. It's prolly only a matter of time before he gets together with someone, or even back with Danielle, and it gets serious. And then there'll be no time for little old me. Getting a crush on my best friend has pretty much condemned me to a life of spinsterhood.

"Nothing…" I answer his question in a small voice. He sighs and play pouts at me,

"C'mon - that’s not fair! You always tell me…"

"Sometimes," I stress - if I suddenly decide not to tell him, he's bound to figure it out, "I sometimes tell you."

"Oh yeah? Well name someone you haven't told me about…" he persists.

"Well, if I told you, then you'd know as much as I do! And that’s not a good thing."

He grins at me, "Yea it is, tell me."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just can't."

"Is it someone I know?"

I automatically tense up and Abs notices.

"Ahh…it's one of the boys isn't it?" he guesses.

"No…" I lie.

"It is. Why can't you tell me?" Abs pauses, thinking, "He's got a girlfriend, hasn’t he? That's why!"

"Maybe, sorta. I don’t wanna talk about it!" I mutter, annoyed with myself for letting him get this much information from me. I know which question is coming next - two words, always used between us to sum up our feelings.

Abs sighs, "How serious?"

"Very…" I squeeze my eyes shut before I start crying. Abs is behind me, his arms round me, so he doesn’t notice, "…I think," I gulp, "The way I feel right now, he's one of the most important things in my life - I'd do anything for him."

"You would?" another sigh from Abs, "You got it bad girl…" he hugs me tightly, "Don’t worry - everything's gonna work out ok…" and then, so quiet that its almost to himself, "I hope…"

I turn my head to look at him, tilting up a little. Our faces are so close that it makes my heart skip a beat, "You hope?" I say softly. He nods his head slowly.

"Well, things have a habit of screwing up…" I'm told, "But you deserve better - you deserve to be happy."

"Oh Abs…"I sigh, twisting round a little and sliding my arms round him, "You deserve to be happy too…I mean, look. All this stuff with Danielle. You need someone who treats you better than her…" I raise my eyes for a second to search his but he's looking away, his jaw clenched. His eyes are devoid of emotion - and I can't figure out if that's good or bad. By the time he looks at me, I'm staring at something else. There's a certain tension that's never been there before - but that's due to all this talk of Danielle. Trust me to bring up a difficult subject and put my foot in it. Abs can prolly only talk about her for so long and then snap. I don’t want him to snap; I want him to be mine.

"Do me a favour…" Abs starts sourly, his voice bringing me back to reality. I prepare myself for him telling me to mind my own business, "When you find a guy you feel comfortable with…I mean really relaxed, DON’T let go. If he's a nice guy, treats you right and you like him…please just don’t let go," Abs almost pleads. I smile to myself and nod,

"I won't. Trust me…I won't."