"I'd like to help you out, Arnie," Mr. Gray said, dumping catsup all over the underside of his burger, "But the market's been pretty slack these days."
"I know," I admitted, "Things weren't that great when I left, either."
"You look great, though," Mr. Gray beamed, "Your time away has really done wonders for you."
I smiled at the old man across from me in this booth at the Good Food Diner. There was something he had not said, and if I knew Mr. Gray -- which I did -- he would soon say it.
Mr. Gray put down the ketchup purposefully and looked at me piercingly. "Can I be honest with you, Arnie?"
"You always have, Mr. Gray."
"You look like crap, boy."
I nodded, taking a sip from my water glass.
"I mean, look at you: your hair's long and stringy, you're twenty pounds underweight, I can't begin to talk about your complexion..."
I put my glass down. "Well, that's your opinion, Mr. Gray --"
"Damn straight it is! And I make opinion in this business. Now, with you looking like this, how could I possibly get you any assignments?"
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Mr. Gray."
"Not in the fashion industry!" My old agent was getting mighty excited, "And -- well, yes, you're right. Beauty's in the eye of the beholder, and, as a model, the beholder's eye is mine, and -- clean yourself up, man!"
"I'd like to," I replied, "But I need a stake to started, do you think...?"
He shook his head violently, "To be even franker, you weren't such hot stuff before you disappeared. Your look was getting played out."
I tried to contain my bemusement. This was all news to me. "How does a foot model get played out?"
"Oh, you know," Mr. Gray said, "Feet... Look, it's been great seeing you again, Arnie, and, if you fix yourself up, let m know. Maybe we can get you some work in some of the third place markets."
He stood up, put on his hat, and scarf, and put his hand out. I didn't shake it at first, a little upset at this turn of events. I was not the golden boy I used to be. Where was the Jolly Rogers now?
"Well, thanks for your time, Mr. Gray," I finally said, putting my hand out to my old boss. "I'll get back to you as soon as I can."
` "You do that, boy," he said, and, now that I was standing, had brought his portly body across the booth closer to mine, "I want to tell you something, because I've always liked you so much, and this is something my mentor told me when I was a lad. I hope you don't think it presumptuous of me to share it with you."
"Not at all, sir. Every little bit helps."
"Listen to me, then," he moved his face close enough to mine so that no hidden tape recorders could sneak on his secret advice, then, with a final glance askance, said, "Presentation is important."
He nodded sagely, looking at me from the corner of his eye, and walked out of the restaurant. Just as Mr. Gray walked past the front glass door, GiGi Malmsteen did not glide to my table.
"Anything else?" she didn't ask, because, of course, GiGi was working a different set of tables. The waitress before me was one I hadn't seen before, and believe me I'd remember.
Big, blonde and beautiful, she reminded me of... no, that wasn't it. She was like no one I'd ever seen before. Gorgeous. Her name tag read Adrianna. I have no idea how I didn't notice her before, when she brought Mr. Gray his food and me my water. I must have been involved in the desperation of the moment. Now, I was desperately in love.
I stumbled off towards the bathroom instead of answering her.
"GiGi," I found, right near the washroom, "Who is she?"
"She? Her? Your waitress? Adrianna. She's signed on since you've been gone."
"You can tell me more than that," I chided, "What's she like? Is she married? Gay? Otherwise taken? Jewish? Porcine? What's her secret identity? Can I borrow her for a few hours?"
GiGi laughed. She likes me, despire being the only long-running Good Food waitress I haven't hit on -- or perhaps because of it. I mean, no offense to Ms. Malmsteen, she's a pretty cool lady and all, but the fact that she's great-godmother of one of my old girlfriends kind of puts me off a little bit.
"You'll get in trouble, little boy," GiGi said to me.
"No information?"
"She'll break your heart in a thousand places."
"Just so long as she takes me to a thousand places with it."
She grinned along with me. This was not the first time I'd enlisted GiGi in my love-making escapades.
"I'll see what I can do," she said.
"Me, too," I said, returning to my table. She was standing right there, Adrianna was, picking up Mr. Gray's dishes.
"Don't do that!" I called, before I could help myself.
She was surprised, turning to me as she hastily put the plate back down.
"Sorry," she said, "But when you walked off, after the other guy, I assumed you were done."
"Well," I said, sitting back down, "Just give me a minute more with this plate, then it's all yours."
She shrugged, walked off, but was shaking her head in a curious way. I didn't like the looks of it, despite the looks of her.
I gobbled down the burger, trying to catch Adrianna's eye to smile wryly at her. She totally avoided my gaze.
As I pondered this, someone entered the Good Food Diner. This occasion is rare enough to merit mentioning. I checked to see if I'd recognize the person. Odds, if the person was a regular of long standing, I'd know him. If it was a recent regular, I'd probably have no knowledge of her. Why someone would be a new regular, though, was totally beyond me.
Strangely, I did recognize the new-comer, though he wasn't a regular.
"Hey, Juan," I waved, "Pull up a chair."
"Arnie, right?" He said, coming over to the booth. I never knew him too well, but John had introduced me to his gangland friend years ago. I figured he'd be good for another meal, maybe even a drink.
"Bingo," I gestured to the seat across, "Join me."
"Sure," he shrugged, and sat.
"Get you anything?" Adrianna said, suddenly upon us. My heart gave a start, as much at the surprise as her astounding beauty.
"Nah," he said, and waved her off. She left, I noticed, without once looking at me.
"Back in town?" I said.
"Yeah," Juan looked back at the door, "A little business." His gaze returned to me. "You know where John is? I called his mom; she said she kicked him out."
"Go figure," I said, "You hungry? My treat."
A safe move, since he'd already refused the incredible Adrianna.
"No thanks," Juan replied. "I just wanna catch John. Haven't heard from him in the last month."
"No? Well, he's staying over at Steve's, whining about something or someone." I laughed, "Same old John, huh?"
"Yeh," Juan let out a tight, slim smile, "Same old John. At Steve's, huh? OK. Thanks, Arnie." He patted my shoulder and stood up. Then Juan, all strength and purpose, strode out the door as if he'd never come in.
"What's he doing back?" GiGi asked, immediately at my side. Before Pittsburgh, I'd never have been so surprised by so many waitresses.
"Dunno," I asked, as Juan faded across the street, "What's up with the chick? Have I stiffed her? Gray did pay the bill before he left, didn't he?"
"Yep," GiGi said, also shaking her head, "And you ate the rest of his food."
Oh. I guess that doesn't look all that good, eating off of other people's plates like that. Still, she must understand that not everyone has those high-paying waitress jobs, with free meals, to get through the day. Some people had to struggle. Me, I needed to stockpile on blubber, a commodity I severely lacked. If she didn't understand hard times, maybe she just wasn't the babe for me. Or maybe I'd radically change my life to have a chance with her. This rut would have to end. I would have to do something to get out of these dire straits.
GiGi peered at me.
"What?" I asked.
She dabbed at my face with a wipe cloth.
"You've got something on your cheek."
Oh. That.

"I dunno, Arnie," Steve said, after polishing his mocha soda, "I think he might be telling the truth."
"Number one," I said, "John is a fool. Number two, He lies to himself almost as much as he lies to his friends --"
"-- He doesn't lie, per se --"
"-- Another lie --"
"-- So much as recreate reality to fit his desires."
I let that distinction lie.
"Number three, there's no evidence of John being anywhere near right about any of this."
Steve said, "You're being pretty hard on John here."
"Maybe I am," I admitted. Maybe I was jealous. It did bother me that John was getting help from Steve so readily. He was so upset because of this break-up thing, and Steve was being supportive. It's sickening, really. I mean, where was the support for me? Did I have to do something like John, and ask for it? Some people have no sense of deceit or manipulation whatsoever.
"Yeah, could be," I said, "Course, you've been pretty soft on John. Just yesterday, you were going to steam him to death, and now you're his best friend."
"Well, he's going through a tough time now. I mean, I feel for him. He's just broken up -- or thinks he has -- and I'm not too far from a break-up myself."
"Try again?" I said. What was he talking about?
"Well, it's been a little over a month since JJ and I split. I know what's up with John."
"You and JJ broke up." I repeated. "Damn, man! Why didn't you tell me about it?"
Steve arched an eyebrow. "You didn't know?"
"I was outta town, Steve!"
Steve shook his head, obviously annoyed. "You've been back for a while or so now, and you haven't wondered why JJ hasn't been constantly around me, as per usual?"
I think Steve winced as he said that.
"I'm sorry, boy," I said, "I didn't know."
"Whatever." Steve shrugged, and tried to get Adrianna's eye. She was still not giving me the time of day, but right now, it didn't seem to matter.
I am a really lousy friend. Incredibly self-involved. I should have noticed that Steve hadn't mentioned the former love of his life over and over and over in every conversation. I should have realized that Steve couldn't have John in the house if JJ was practically living there. I've been so wrapped up in my own homelessness, unemployment and general bad-luckedness that I was totally oblivious to Steve's pain. I have to stop being so insensitive. Some day soon.
Trying to change the subject, I said, "So, was John surprised when Juan stopped by?"
Steve laughed. "John would be! Juan didn't come over; he's in prison in Baltimore."
"No..." I said slowly, "Juan's in town. I saw him yesterday. Right here. He said John's mom had kicked him out."
"I wonder why Juan's in town." Steve said uncertainly.

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