The Rush Rules
(version 3)

1) Rush is the greatest band on the planet and anyone who puts them down in any way gets their ass kicked.

2) Anyone who makes fun of Geddy gets a foot shoved so far up their ass it will impale their tonsils.

3) Anyone who says Rush is just a Canadian band that’s managed to stay together and stay away from the big time gets a five hour comprehensive Rush history

4) Once a Rush song has started you cannot turn it off (exceptions: If you’re sticking in 2112 or any live album you can stop it)

5) The volume on a Rush song can only be turned up, never down. (exception: you can turn it down when you’re in the car for safety’s sake)

6) If you start playing the Rush collection in its entirety, you must complete the endeavor.

7) If you intend to sing along with a Rush song, don’t try to match Geddy’s range on any albums before GUP

8) If you intend to sing along with a Rush song, make sure you know ALL the lyrics and not just the chorus.

9) When you buy a new stereo, 2112 must be the first song/album played in it.

10) Anyone who says that Neil’s lyrics suck must be forced to listen to Fly By Night through Test for Echo until they come to realize their mistake.

11) If Rush is on the radio in the car, and you reach your destination, that doesn’t mean that the ride is over and you get out of the car.

12) Never, under any circumstances, make a Rush fan decide between you and seeing Rush live

13) Seeing the Rhythm Method live is better than sex. (If you say different, think about this: Neil plays in a cone of lasers, can you have sex in a cone of lasers? I don’t think so)

14) Having sex during The Rhythm Method live would be the greatest experience of any Rush fan’s life.

15) Ben is not to be interrupted, for any reason, during Geddy’s bass solo in Closer to the heart. (From experience we know he will react violently)

16) Anyone who says that John Rutsey was a better drummer than Neil must listen to Rush and then listen to Fly By Night through Test for Echo and then be given a lecture by Shannon on how cool Neil is until their mind is changed.

17) If the person who says that Rutsey is better still isn’t convinced after that, they are given the extended Rush history by Ben

18) Ben has Geddy Lee printed under his picture in his high school yearbook, and that makes him cooler than any other Rush fan that we know.

19) If you are going to see Rush live, you must refer to it as: Going to worship the Holy Canadian Trinity.

20) You must go to visit Toronto before you die.

21) Addenda to Rule 7: Don’t try to sing along with Geddy if you have a sore throat, or even if you throat isn’t sore for that matter

22) Obsolete, absolute, absolom


Rules Created by: Ben Hambright, Chad Parker, Shannon Clarke, and Shelly Mallazo