.

Hunter turned slowly, numbly, and walked towards the door. The doors slid open, only sensing that there was movement in front of their sensors.

Hunter felt the warm air across his face, in contrast with the cold air inside the hospital. Once Hunter cleared the doors, he broke into a run. He didn't know where he was going, but he had to get away from the hospital. He ran and ran until he was out of breath. He stopped, gasping and looked around. He sensed the trees overhead and the grass beneath his feet. He looked across the street that was to his left and saw his school. Then he realized that he was in the same spot that he and Mckensie had eaten lunch that one day, a few weeks ago. He thought back to that day when things had changed.

'If only I had said something different. If only I hadn't brought up Mckensie's dad. If only…' Hunter stopped and thought of the worthlessness of 'If Onlys.' A piece of white paper caught his eye and he stooped to grab the little triangular piece of worn, folded paper. There was dirt caked on one side, but then he realized that it was his drawing of Cindy. It was then that Hunter collapsed in the dirt and cried. Clutching the tattered, torn, dirty piece of paper to his chest, he sobbed and sobbed. He cried out at losing his friend, at having to go to school and face all his and Mckensie's friends, at Mckensie and Ms. Jane's situation, and the unfairness of his situation.

'Why did this have to happen to me and Mckensie?' he thought. 'Why my friend, why the people I know?' Hunter cried until he could cry no more. He was so empty at that point that all he could do was shake. He tucked the piece of paper into his chest shirt pocket and slowly trudged the few blocks to his house. His mom and his grandmom were still at the hospital. Hunter entered the house and flipped on a few lights. He walked numbly upstairs and went into Mckensie's room. Her bookbag lay on the floor next to the dresser as if nothing had happened. Her suitcase, still packed sat in front of the closet. Out of the corner of his eye, on the bedstand, Hunter saw a worn, thoroughly read book. It's green cover complimented the gold embossing that proclaimed the title, "Poems of Love and Such." Hunter picked up the book and curled up on Mckensie's bed. He lay and started to cry again. He cried until he fell asleep.

About fifteen minutes later he awoke with a start.

"Mckensie!" he said outloud. With the same urgency that he had when he left the hospital, he dashed out of the house, and back up the few blocks that led to the hospital. He ran in the ER and looked around frantically. He ran over to the desk clerk and leaned over the counter.

"I need to see my friend Mckensie!" he gasped.

"Excuse me?" The startled clerk looked up at the harried boy who was leaning over her counter.

"My friend, she came in, and she- she's sick. What do I do? Who do I see?" Hunter asked hurriedly.

"Oh, the girl with the drug overdose," nodded the clerk.

"Not a drug overdose," Hunter began. "She had-,"

"Go down the hall and turn left, and if anyone gives you a hard time, tell them you are seeing, ah," she checked her records, "Mckensie Burr."

Hunter pushed through the double doors and at the end of the hall turned left. 'Now what?' he thought.

"Excuse me, sir?" he said to a big attendant.

"Sorry kid, go wait in the waiting room." The attendant shrugged and walked away.

Down the hall, Hunter saw his mom and his grandmom come out of a room.

"Mom!" he cried. He ran down the hall to his mom.

"Hi Hunter," said his mom softly.

Hunter looked through the window and saw Mckensie lying in a hospital bed.

"I'll meet you two at home," said Hunter, slowly pushing open the door to Mckensie's room.

"Okay, Hunter." His mom said as she and her mother walked down the hall.

The door closed behind Hunter as he stood staring at Mckensie. She lay in a simple hospital bed. She had been moved from ICU to a room that was just so her friends and family could say good-bye to her. Hunter slowly moved over to her side. Her dark hair fanned out on the pillow around her head. Her face was ghostly pale, except around her mouth. Her skin was stained black from where she had thrown up the charcoal solution they made her swallow in hopes that she would throw up the pills she had taken.

Hunter reached out and smoothed Mckensie's hair off her face. He awkwardly stood next to her. He had never dealt with emotion that was so deep as what he felt now. Hunter hadn't dealt with the death of his father, so as he dealt with Mckensie's death the emotion he had shoved down inside of him, when his father died, came to the surface. There were so many things Hunter wanted to say to Mckensie. But he couldn't find a way to talk without sobbing.

"Mckensie…" he said softly. "Mckenise." He stood silent for minutes. "You know, my house is going to be awfully lonely without you. I'm going to miss you so much. I wish I could have said good-bye…" Hunter looked out the windows in the swinging doors of the ICU room. He reached down and softly held Mckensie's hand. As he did so, he noticed a silver ring on her hand. He had never seen it before. She must have put it on right before she committed suicide. He slid it off her finger and looked at it carefully. It looked like a new ring. As he tilted it, he saw an engraving on the inside of it. The engraving said: MSR & HLB. Hunter and her initials. Hunter collapsed on the floor of the ICU room and sobbed. He cried until he could cry no more. Slowly, he rose from the floor and bent over Mckensie. "Mckenise," he whispered, "you're my best friend. I will never forget you. I will always have a special place for you in my heart…" Hunter stood over the shell of a girl who used to be so vibrant and full of life. He stood over her and whispered every cliched saying he could think of. Then, he turned and walked out of the ICU room, saying good-bye to his best friend. He left with half a heart. The other half was gone the instant Mckensie took her last breath.

"Hunter?" Sarah called to her husband who was in the kitchen. "Could you make some popcorn? I can never watch a movie without popcorn."

"Sure, Sarah. Be right there in, ohhh… about two and a half minutes." Hunter called from the kitchen. Sarah heard the microwave kick into action.

"Mommmmyyyy…" little Caitlin called from the doorway.

"Yes, darling, love of my life?" Sarah said.

"Are you going to watch a movie?" Caitlin walked over to where her mother was curled up on the couch.

"Yep. And you're just in time. How do you feel about Homeward Bound?" Sarah grinned.

"Yey!!" Caitlin jumped onto the couch. "I love that movie!"

Hunter Burr married Sarah Ferguson when he was thirty and she was twenty-nine. Two years later they had Caitlin Burr, who was now six. They both lived in the suburbs of New York in a big apartment. Hunter was a successful business man who had a good marriage and loved his little girl Caitlin. Twenty-two years had passed since that fateful day in Manhattan, and not a day went by when Hunter didn't raise his head to the sky and think of Mckensie. One time, Caitlin asked him what he was looking for, and he smiled a private smile and said, "Caitlin, I'm looking for an angel."

"Popcorn's ready!" Hunter said, coming into the living room carrying a fresh bag of popcorn and two sodas. "Oh, I see we have a visitor."

Caitlin grinned. "I couldn't sleep, daddy." Hunter sat on the couch next to his wife and his little girl. Caitlin immediately climbed into his lap. She leaned against his chest and ate some popcorn. "Ow, daddy. Something's hurting me." Caitlin reached behind her and into Hunter's shirt. She pulled out a silver ring on a chain. "Oh," she said. "It was just your ring."

"Do you know where I got that ring, Caitlin?" Hunter asked.

"No," said the little girl, shaking her head.

"An angel gave it to me. It fell from Heaven." Hunter said.

"Wow," said Caitlin in awe. Just then, the movie started.

"Ooh, look Caitlin, the movie's starting," said Sarah. Hunter hugged his daughter, put his arm around his wife and settled back to enjoy the movie.

Katie McCarty
kmccarty@crosslink.net
-1997-1998-

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