How much wood could a woodchuck chuck...

All About Me

he runs because he can... that's why. Alrighty... well, what do you want to know? I suppose I have to tell you something about myself, I just don't know where to start, so if I start to ramble on, bear with me...
    Ok, here goes. My name is Lisa, I now live in Cobourg, Ontario, Canada (no more Hamilton. *sigh*) with my boyfriend of almost 4 years (holy shit that's a long time), Matt, and a bunch of crazy animals... We now have 3 lovely cats named Black (she's black... pretty straightforward) Spliff (don't ask) and Frank (after Zappa, of course), an iguana named Leroy, and 2 gerbils named Billy and Bobby. (real exciting, eh? Hold onto your pants; the fun's just beginning...)
I will be 22(!) in june and to tell you the truth it scares the shit out of me. It's just too weird... wow. how scary...
I finished school at Westdale in Hamilton and have since joined the work force (that's even scarier). I deal drugs for a living. Ha! That woke you up, didn't it! No, but seriously, I'm a pharmacy technician. I like my job and it likes me, I guess, but lately I've been feeling the drag... I need an EXCITING NEW CAREER!!! I'm working on finishing my OACs (If you don't know what those are, you obviously don't live in Ontario, and therefore don't deserve an explanation... read on) and hope to then go to University to be a vet... life-long dream, blah blah blah...
    As for passtimes (pass-times?), well, I don't really do anything extremely productive. Basically, I try my darndest to keep the web page up to date (i'm losing that battle... I'm too damn lazy. In fact this is the first time I have touched this thing in over 2 years) but other than that, I have no hobbies. (It's kind of sad, really) Unless you call getting tattoos a hobby, but I don't think that works... Other than that, I mostly read. My favourite author is KURT VONNEGUT, favourite books include A Clockwork Orange,   SLAUGHTERHOUSE FIVE, The Catcher In the Rye, Trainspotting, 1984, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST, and A PRAYER FOR OWEN MEANY. Read Them!! I also read a lot of non-fiction stuff. I read a lot about cats (favourite animal, dontcha know) and chemistry and other oh-so-important subjects. Ok, I'm a geek... leave me alone.
OR... I clean. Yes, I admit, that sounds strange, but my mother has turned me into a clean freak, and I can't sit down if there are dust bunnies floating around or stuff out of place. oh well... what can you do?
Hmmm... what else do I do? I sit around a lot in my pyjamas. I love pyjamas. When I lived at home with mama and dad, I watched a lot of TV, but things have changed... (holy toledo... who would have thought so much would have changed since I updated this thing last... I've ended up rewriting the whole damn thing. See what I mean about being lazy?) Now we have a crappy TV and we don't subscribe to all the fancy-dancy channels, so if I watch TV at all, it's usually not for very long. I end up watching a lot of entertaining programs... ha! A&E, Discovery Channel, TLC... I'm just full of useless facts. If I can find them, I love LOST IN SPACE, THE AVENGERS, Trauma:Life in the ER (blood and guts!! yum yum!), Monty Python, That '70s show, ER, and oh yeah... I'm a Jeopardy freak. Every night at 7:30. I yell out answers at the TV. Me and ALEX are like this. (Imagine my fingers crossed in front of your face...)
Umm... I hang out with friends...never. Now that I've moved from Hamilton, I don't get to see them that often, so now I hang out with Matt, and sometimes his friends if we go home to Warkworth. (Hicksville. The excitement capital of Ontario.) Anyways, for what it's worth, hello to Margo, Kim Sewer, Sara, Nick, Corissa, Gillian, etc, etc, etc, if they even remember me ha ha ha.
    Actors & Actresses. Love GARY OLDMAN; he plays a great bad guy, and a pretty convincing Sid Vicious. I also like MALCOLM McDOWELL, Mel Gibson, JACK NICHOLSON, Jimmy Stewart, Harrison Ford, Sean Connery (the BEST), ROBERT CARLYLE, EWAN MCGREGOR, PAUL NEWMAN, MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY, Miranda Richardson, Johnny Depp, and umm... who else...I can't think of any more right now, but I know there are some. Oh well. So it goes...
    Favourite movie, you ask? (well, you didn't really, but I'm going to tell you anyway.) A CLOCKWORK ORANGE... no big surprise there, I have a whole page dedicated to that malenky bit of sinny... I like Trainspotting, HARVEY, DR. STRANGELOVE, Braveheart, The Sting, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Cool Hand Luke, Sid & Nancy, Hud, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Dazed and Confused, Cat On a Hot Tin Roof, A Fish Called Wanda, FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF, THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW, and seventies and eighties-style lame-o horror movies like the Blob, the Incredible Melting Man, Halloween, GORGO, and Sleepaway Camp... so funny!! OH!!! I saw Lord of the Rings, and it's AWESOME!!! I can't wait for the next installment...
    As for music, well, I don't think I'm even going to bother... talk about a stupid question, geez!! (PUNK. the Pistols, germs, dead kennedys, the clash, PiL, and so on...) But!! I also like classical (esp. Beethoven & Rossini) and I'm really into Zappa (obviously), and a lot of old classic rock. Don't ask me how that fits, but somehow, it does... it's all my dad's fault... he's a big fan... anyways... this is going nowhere...
    Other things I Love: STAND UP/SKETCH COMEDY (especially MONTY PYTHON, Fawlty Towers, Jimeoin McKeown, Eddie Izzard, Mike MacDonald, Denis Leary, Mike Bullard, Jeremy Hotz, BILLY CONNOLLY!!! and I suppose that's all for now), MAD MAGAZINE, tattoos, Calvin & Hobbes, Chocolate Milk (i once thought I was lactose intolerant. I got these weird pains when i drank milk, but then it went away... weird), Felix the Cat, James Bond, RED MEAT COMICS, sleep, thunder storms, being outside, THE YOUNG ONES, the colour ORANGE, rain and snow, dill pickles, orange sherbet, PEEWEE'S PLAYHOUSE, long car rides, lime Jell-o, the taste of Pepto Bismol (you can get lollipops in Hamilton that taste EXACTLY like it! I don't think they're supposed to, but they are DEElicious... and now that I've moved, i'm completely cut off *sigh*), anything else? I'll keep you posted...
    Things I do not like: people (well, let's just say I'm not a people person. I guess I'm a bit cynical, and well... really sarcastic), 90210 or any other lame-o soap operas, old people chewing gum (I KNOW it's stupid, I don't know why it bothers me so much... ), racism (and all those other "isms" that I am too lazy to list...), waiting in line, those who lack a sense of humour and don't understand the sarcasm that constantly flows from my mouth, stale bread, stepping in cat puke in the middle of the night (it has happened to me MORE THAN ONCE! enough times to warrant a place on this list, anyways), chili, people that make a mess in my apartment, when Matt works nights, talking on the phone and... ummm once again my mind has drawn a blank... I'm sure I can think of a whole bunch of things to hate, but not right now, ok? good. I knew you'd agree...
    Wow, I'm writing a book here... half of you have probably given up long ago, (I bet they'd be kicking themselves if they knew of all the fun WE'RE having, wouldn't they, loyal readers...?) Don't worry, It's almost over.
    Finally, what the hell do I look like, anyway...? I hope to be sticking a picture right in this very spot sometime soon, as soon as I can get one scanned. But for now, you'll have to imagine...
I am 5'5 (I hate being short) with brown eyes and short purple hair (it used to be orange, then it was black, then it was bright red... When I'm not lazy I put it in big porcupine spikes all over my head.); I have 15 (count 'em... 15!) tattoos in various places all over my body. As for piercings, I have my tongue pierced and a labret (for those of you who know nothing, a labret is a stud or ring right under the lower lip, in the middle...) and that's all there is to it. Thank you for bearing with me and being so damn patient; I appreciate it. No really... I do. Now go, have fun, and SIGN MY GUESTBOOK!!

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