WILDERNESS

AS PLAYED BY SIMON'S GRANDPA

A SPOOKY GAME FOR ALL THE FAMILY!!!

Here is a spooky game that anyone can play... AS LONG AS THEY'RE BRAVE ENOUGH!

How many can play WILDERNESS???

As many as you want! But it must involve at least ONE.

Where do you play WILDERNESS???

WILDERNESS is best played in a car, as night, but you could also play wherever there is a window which looks out into the empty DARKNESS OF NIGHT-TIME!

The countryside is a good place! Or why not play WILDERNESS while driving along an empty motorway or country lane!

Remember, if you're in a car the driver can't play! They have to keep their eyes on the road! But you... you can look out into... the WILDERNESS!!! (Unless 'you' are the driver, in which case you can't play either.)

How to play WILDERNESS!

Press you face close to the window or rear window of the car and look back into the empty DARKNESS OF NIGHT-TIME! Then slowly and spookily chant the words 'WILDERNESS, WILDERNESS!!' over and over and over again! Not too loud, not too quiet! But with a deep voice like a GHOST!!!

How do you win WILDERNESS???

It is impossible to win at WILDERNESS because it is not that type of game! It's just SPOOKY fun!!! But for those of you who have to be so flippin' competitive all the time, why not play like this:

A Until nobody can stand playing it any longer - the last one to keep chanting WILDERNESS is the winner!

B Until the driver of the car goes mad because they are sick of hearing everyone else chant WILDERNESS while they have to be all boring and responsible!

C Until something leaps out of the WILDERNESS and frightens everyone to bits! In this case the THING that leaps out of the WILDERNESS is the winner!

D Until your heads explode!

E Until it's daylight!

Have fun!!!